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    Old 11-27-2007, 12:00 PM   #31
    captnanny
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    hey Tat, my ancestors are from county cork and mayo. I don't know much about the methadone or sub so, can't chime in. I just and trying to post wherever I can.

     
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    Old 11-27-2007, 12:58 PM   #32
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    Hey Capt...let'ss catch up in a little bit and chat, huh What a small world it is.

    Oh, and I truly DO look forward to your input....honest.

    See you in a little bit - after I get the Rugrats from the bus stop.

    tat*

     
    Old 11-27-2007, 03:26 PM   #33
    Yossarian22
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    Hi G8tr , Man! i wish i was in florida right now - i even tried to convince my wife to move there after we holiday'd there a couple of years back. i found the weather had an amazing effect on my mood S.A.D. seasonal affected dissorder i think its called (i aint really suffering from it - i just hate the rain here!) how r the gators doin at the moment??? we only ever hear about the superbowl final over here - everyone is far more interested with the game they call football in the rest of the world (coz we play it with our feet!) soccer as you guys call it!
    Its amazing the way loved ones can just "rub salt in" and make you feel crap/guilty!! especially at times when you need it least! - there is a amazingly accurate/funny poem by a guy called Philip Larkin called 'This be the verse' do an internet search - i think you'll find some truth and humour in the first verse - disregard the last verse as its not for the likes of us - the guy is a pretty bitter/twisted guy. ( imust stop going on about poetry!!!!!) anyway - you said your husband is a diffrent board - is he cool with it all? (you dont have to answer this- just intersted) anyway - concentrate on the boys - and keep fighting the good fight, block out anyone else negativity - you know you're doing the right thing.
    hope to speak/type soon

    keep on keepin on

    yoss22

    Last edited by Yossarian22; 11-27-2007 at 03:27 PM.

     
    Old 11-27-2007, 04:46 PM   #34
    g8trgrl15
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    I was going to remark about your comment about music a while ago... Music has really been a lifesaver to me. And I've actually enjoyed it for the first time in a while. The gators did ok this year, they are a young team. We aren't going to the SEC championchip game this year, but next year we will be a force to contend with.

    My husband supports in his own way, which is to work more and stay away from home more. Not help out with the kids, and throw jibes in here and there about my past mistakes. It doesn't matter really. We sleep in different beds. It does matter because now is the time I need someone the most...ya know? I think I'm just a little depressed today.. group didn't go too well tonight, and it was no inspiration. The facilitator kicked a guy out tonight because he had been drinking. I could see both sides of it, but I felt bad for the guy. He could've chosen not to come to group. But he did. He could've been a trigger for someone, I know that. It was a big thing in group though. Anyway, it's nighttime here. I'm going to go try to get some sleep. I'm trying to stay strong and I decreased my mgs today. Took only 6. So that's a start. Thanks for replying and I'll talk to you soon!!

    g8tr

     
    Old 11-28-2007, 11:13 AM   #35
    jerry111165a
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    Talking Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    Come to Maine...we have plenty of snow to go around!
    :}

     
    Old 11-28-2007, 01:13 PM   #36
    tat2duser
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    Heh heh heh.... LOTTTTSSSSS of the white crap here, too.

    Too much actually....

     
    Old 11-28-2007, 02:42 PM   #37
    Yossarian22
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    hi g8tr! sounds like your husband and my wife could be related! im in the same situation exactly!!!! (though i got to admit - my habbit has been quite a destructive influence on all aspects of family life, so im not surprised we're in separate rooms at the moment!!!).
    As for being depressed - group sounded like it didnt go well - but the best news was that you dropped to 6ml/mg!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats amazing! im proud of you! i know how difficult tapering is & esp when youve had a bad day. - as i have said "god loves a trier!" and no 1 tries harder than a dedicated mother. keep your chin up , keep fightin the good fight, seeing as though you are winning it!! my thought s r with you.

    ps i've asked my close friend santa to see if he could get you Tim Tebow, so fingers crossed?! you never knwo what you'll wake up to!! (if so - his beautiful girlfriend may need someone to quote her poetry and help her get over tim *coughs* ahem !!!

    hang in there g8r

    keep on keepin on

    ps - you lucky people having snow! id even forego the sun and have snow - if it meant i could escape this carppy rain!!!

     
    Old 11-28-2007, 05:41 PM   #38
    oh-notagain
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    i just read through this entire post, and oh, you guys have me laughing and crying; the support here is wonderful !! yoss, hope this post finds you doing well. how long has it been now? you are such an inspiration!! i, too had your monkey on my back for many many years. i managed to beat it and stay sober for 5 1/2 years. and then i hurt my back in april and relapsed, because i "needed it for pain".. load a crud really. it stopped hurting enough for 80mg oxy's after the first few days, but the bug bit me again. and i coulndt stop.. so now im on sub since may and just hangin in at 4mg. not sure when im going to taper, but im not acting in a big hurry anyway.
    ok, enough about me. i just wanted to chime in on this post an say GOOD JOB YOSS !!!! take care,

    hugs, michelle

     
    Old 11-29-2007, 01:56 PM   #39
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    LOL!! Yoss, you have me rolling!! I tell ya what, if Santa does grant your wish.. I will make sure his girlfriend knows where to go for comfort.. That boy is sure a fine specimen.. he he. Anyway, yeah, it was a bad day, and the past few days I"ve just felt weepy.. like I've just wanted to cry all of the time!! I don't know why.. part of the w/d? Part of recovery? I know some people get depressed during recovery.. Maybe that's what this is. I don't know. All I know is I don't like it. Hubby's trying a getaway this weekend as it's our 8th wedding anniversary. I don't think it's going to help anything.. I'm just a different person now and he doesn't see that. But yes, 6mgs down. And how are you doing?? Everyone else hanging in there?? I hope so. Hope to hear from you soon Yoss..

    g8tr

     
    Old 11-29-2007, 03:28 PM   #40
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    yo g8tr - hang in there, the emotions will be going into interstellar overdrive at the moment! believe me. the emotions seem to come flooding back - being on opiates seem to suppress them. so it kind of feels overwhelming at the moment, ride it out - i found myself crying at films, crying at music, crying for almost no reason! and im a big strong man who never shows emotion usually!!!!!! so just bear that in mind - its not depression - its your feelings coming back. As for hubby - i'd leave any massive future decissions on relationships until you manage to get off the pills. i was on the verge of divorce with my wife - i even had a shopping list of what i was gonna spend my half of the house sale profits - campervan, moto-x bike, 6months in thailand/vietnam - the list went on. im so glad now that i didnt as i can see (this is in MY opinion! - so dont take it as gospel!) that any major life decision made under the influence of such a strong toxin wouldnt necesserily be the right one - if that makes any sense. After all - we dont like to admit it - WE are different people, WE are the ones who have changed due to the habits we have. the old you is in there just dying to get back out - just keep taking it one day at a time -looking in to the future just makes life unnescesserily complicated. i have my fingers crossed and have just washed my lucky rabbits foot in your honour.

    hope things r starting to stabilise on your taper

    hope to hear from you soon

    And BIG THANKS for your lovely comments and words of support michelle - they sure do make a difference - again, it just makes me so angry with my weakness when compared to yourself - as your addiction is the result of pain management. So i have the ultimate respect for you (and all the others on the board who i know who are in the same situation) - & 4mg is a low dosage , so you are well on yor way to recovery/normality!!! just taper as you see fit - and as far as i am aware you wont feel too bad coming of the subs - so hang in there - fingers crossed/freshly washed lucky rabbits foot - applies to you too

    and as ever

    keep on keepin on

    hope the board are all doin fine - 3rd day of work tommorow - man i feel like ive been hit with a bag of bison!! all good clean fun tho (no heroin/methadone involved)

    yoss22

     
    Old 11-29-2007, 04:52 PM   #41
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    Hi Yossarian22

    I have been reading your postings, only this one so far, to follow up how you are. Now, on Day 12? That is so fantastic. I had a slight experience with meth, about 10 years ago. I was on just a monthly maintenance program and it did what it was supposed to. Wean me off the H. I remember the last few days after the stabilize/drop cycle, how horrid I felt. It was only in the last week that I felt kicky and yukky, and so I guess that isn’t that long in comparison with what others go through.

    Any way you are just where you are supposed to be, with your children, yes they are a great reminder, but I am almost certain you would be doing this even if you didn’t have them. I hope I am on the mark with this one.
    (Blessings for you and them.)

    Yes, I also remember music to be one of my favorite companions, and I would turn the music up so loud, dance like a crazed lady, with a broom and a spoon for a stage mike in the kitchen or living room..

    Yes, and the elements of our universe played a huge factor in my recovery; Like you mentioned, something about the wind and the rain pelting down on you, and then you were at home killing the last of your reservations down the sink. Good for you. That is a milestone. So many people and myself included have given reasons in the past, to say -oh,

    I’m just going to keep it on the shelf just so I know I won’t do it anymore
    Just to prove it to myself, I can handle it
    I will show them, I don’t need help, I can do this on my own
    Or how about this one?
    It’s nice to have around for old time sakes
    Or
    I won’t touch it will be like a tombstone reminder –
    Yeah, whose tombstone?

    Like playing with matches and paper. Fire and Self-inflicted pain.

    I think a lot of the taper is in your head, if you get a little more physical, a little at a time, easy does it, to clear the debris that has been collecting. What happens to old cobwebs in haunted open ruined houses, they stay around unless a large wind and rain storm comes along. That wind storm is created by you getting more physical then the mental stuff will clear.

    And the sneezing, that’s when I knew I was getting better. I started out with 10 sneezes at the offset of the month, I sneezed all month, but I knew when I had it down to 3 sneezes then 2 then 1, I was out of the madness. And even when I withdrew from opioids at the beginning of this year, the sneezing was there again, not starting at 10, they started in concession at 5, wound down 4, 3, 2 and and when I was down to one, I knew soon there would be none.

    I was out there getting lots of fresh air, exercise and out-patient support groups. Hope you grab onto some kind of support, this is the hardest part – STAYING CLEAN –

    Just for today
    kadee


    ,

    Last edited by kadee; 11-29-2007 at 09:46 PM.

     
    Old 11-30-2007, 02:13 AM   #42
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    many thanks kadee - your fantastic post cheered me up this morning. i totally agree with all you've said and have "been" there too. it was like reading something i might have written myself!!! im in total agreeance! anyway your words are a strengthening reminder to all that staying clean is the hardest part.

    "It’s nice to have around for old time sakes" those words are straight from the mouth of my monkey

    its been 17 days now - i still feel very tired/drained - not sleeping too well. taking plenty of liquids,multivits, fruit etc - so hopefully i'll perk up soon.

    hows your monkey at the moment kadee???

    keep on keepin on

    yoss22

    Last edited by Yossarian22; 11-30-2007 at 02:13 AM.

     
    Old 11-30-2007, 01:53 PM   #43
    g8trgrl15
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    Hey guys.. Yoss.. good to hear you're getting better every day. That's pretty much how it goes. I'm doing better today.. Maybe i'm stabilizing out or something.. I don't know. All I know is I didn't wake up this morning and have to take medicine.. actually, I forgot about it! That's never happened before. I actually didn't take my 1st dose until I got to work... around 10. Now I thought that was pretty good. Yoss, I hope you have a nice trip, and congrats on being an Uncle! (if I read that correctly) And you're right about not making any hasty decisions.. I know that I'm just very vulnerable right now....aren't we all? Anyway, I'm sticking to 6 until around Monday then going down to 5.. Should be fine.

    Talk to you soon!
    g8tr

     
    Old 11-30-2007, 02:57 PM   #44
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    hey g8tr - forgetting to take the pills is a MASSIVE step towards recovery - it might not seem it but psychologically its big thing, believe me. the drugs are starting to mean a whole lot less on the inside & life is starting to claw its way back. im truly 'chuffed' as we say over here when u r kind of inflated with happiness! glad to hear that the taper is working well & that you are already setting your sights on the next step down - GO GIRL!!!!

    you read it correctly - i am an uncle, im looking forward to meeting the little fella. only downside to the trip is that i will unfortunatley have to face the demon that is 'my father' (the word father being a VERY loose term!) i haven't seen him in nearly 20yrs since i was 15 (yup im 35 - not 22 as in yoss22) - we havent spoke, he hasnt met my wife - not even sure he knows that i have a son!? (he will not be calling him grandad-thats for sure) - too cut a long story short - he is probably the main reason behind my 'addictive personality' as he's been an alcoholic since before i was born & is still drinking excessivley. Genes!! you cant pick em! So i have the weird feeling of butterflies/anxiety etc - gonna be a strange day, thats for sure.

    anyway - hang in there g8tr - you are doing brilliantly and i got all the faith in the world that you're gonna keep going in the right direction.

    type to you soon

    keep on keepin on

    yoss

     
    Old 12-03-2007, 12:45 PM   #45
    g8trgrl15
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    Re: meth user 3rd day of detox

    Yoss, you have no idea how encouraging your words are. And I can truly understand about parents. My Dad is an alcoholic and my mother is a recovering drug/alcohol user. I'm an only child.. Was this really so unexpected???? I hate that heredity can have so much to do with whether or not someone will become addicted to something. But I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles. I hope you had a wonderful time meeting the new addition, your sire or not. Hopefully it wasn't so bad. I know it had to be awkward though. Anyway, yeah, I went to 6, but there were days over the weekend where I took 8. I dunno, it's so hard to explain. I didn't think this sub was going to even be a factor. I just thought I would taper and bam, it would all be over. I didn't know that sub could be addictive in itself. The Doc never went there during the first meetings. I didn't know that until I started talking to people in group and then found this board. I just know it will help if I become active. And I'm trying there.. My husband works at a big gym here, YMCA. So I think I can go work out free. By the way, this weekend went okay (my anniversary getaway). I just closed my eyes and imagined it was #15.. LOL!!!!!!

    Talk to you later!!
    Brandi

     
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