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    Old 03-22-2008, 07:37 PM   #1
    NotPerky
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    My Taper Tale

    Hi all -- I thought I would start a new thread with my daily taper progress. (My other thread is aptly entitled "Oxycodone Has Ruined My Life".)

    Today is Day 5. I made a 3.75 mg cut today and am now down to 41.25 mg of Oxy IR daily, split into 4 doses. (Oxy IR is like Percocet but without the Tylenol in it.)

    I had been having a problem with morning WD's, so yesterday and today I nipped a little bit off my noon dose and took it about 7 AM to try to avoid the WDs and even things out. So far, so good.

    Last night I went out with the girls and had a great time. We actually met one of the stars of (a TV show about the mob, remember?), who nicely posed for photos with us, so it was a really fun night! I didn't have any WDs while I was out. Don't get me wrong -- I'm still watching the clock. It just makes it easier to be distracted if I'm out and about.

    We had a death in the family. I was on the phone/internet all day today making travel arrangements for my Mom. This would normally be a perfect excuse for me to give up the taper....take an extra pill to deal with the stress. But I feel like I've come so far! I can't go back. I won't go back. I am so excited about feeling "normal" someday soon. I think my mood has improved just anticipating being "pill-free". I'm so envious of people who don't have to rely on pills to get through the day. I'm going to be one of them soon!!!

    It is so good to have all of you guys for support. For those who celebrate Easter, have a great one!

    Last edited by NotPerky; 03-22-2008 at 07:40 PM.

     
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    Old 03-23-2008, 03:41 AM   #2
    bajaboats
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Great Job Perky,

    Cuttin and countin, I was there and know how you feel.
    Your doing great by not slipping back when the stress kicks in. Those little guys in your brain will figure out how to do their jobs without the Oxy soon enough.

    I does feel great to be pill free. I was out shopping for a couple of Easter presents for the kids and as I looked around at the people in the mall I thought to myself, I wonder how many of these people are on something right now? Just a weird thought I had but I knew there was one person that was clean in the mall for sure, ME

    I live in a pretty bad area and crime and drugs run wild here not to mention violent crimes like assault and murder.

    I have for carry a gun when I go to the city which I have a permit for but I'm am most likely only a small number carrying a weapong legally. The 13 yr old kids are the worst here. They shoot then run. Crazy!!

    Well. You keep on keepin on as the Yoss man would say

    Have a Happy Easter.

    As Always,
    Peace,
    Baja
    _________________________
    I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders.
    __________________
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    I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders.

    As Always,
    Peace.
    Baja

     
    Old 03-23-2008, 07:17 PM   #3
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Taper Day 6. I re-calculated my schedule because I had sort of just thrown it together after the first week. I'm afraid if I'm too aggressive, I'll sabotage myself. So I've scheduled a 3.75-mg cut every 3 days. Unfortunately, that takes me out til the end of April. Sheeesh. I know it's wimpy. But I felt like such crap on Day 1 and 2 when I made that initial cut of about 15-25 mg....I think I need to take it slow and steady.

    My house is a mess. I have no energy to clean, or even straighten up....or do my bills....or my tax return....on and on. I needed the pills to hype me up to do most of the activities of daily living. I'm cold. I wish it would warm up because the cold doesn't help when I have chills. I'm depressed without my "artificial energy"....but then get more depressed thinking about what my life will be like if I don't get off this stuff.

    OK, well, sorry to be such a bummer tonight. Helps me to vent though, and put my thoughts in writing.

     
    Old 03-26-2008, 08:58 AM   #4
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Day 8 of taper was yesterday. I went to my PM doc and told him I was tapering off. He's willing to do whatever I need. Told him my current daily total was about 37.5 mg of Oxy IR, split into four doses. He said that is a small dose and theoretically, I could stop completely -- but I’d feel like crap for a week. So he recommended I continue doing the SLOW taper. He also prescribed Clonidine, a blood-pressure med that supposedly helps with the WDs. It is not addictive, and seems to get pretty good reviews from what I’ve read on the board here. I also asked him to cut my normal scrip for Oxy in half, which is about what I calculate I'll need for the rest of the taper.

    So I was doing great yesterday – sticking to my taper schedule, not feeling too bad. However, I did a lot of activity today that aggravated my back. Mostly, the “activity” was shopping for an outfit to wear to this funeral on Fri. I cannot be on my feet for any length of time without suffering later. I also cannot walk for any length of time without suffering later.

    Well, last night as I was driving home (a two-hour drive), my back and leg were ON FIRE with pain. Due to my severe disk degeneration, I have nerve pain down one leg. Oxycodone does not relieve nerve pain completely, but certainly takes the edge off. Well, long story short, I could not stand the pain and I ended up taking about 2-1/2 extra pills over the next couple hours.

    Obviously, I feel terrible about this setback – however, this leads me to wonder how on earth I am going to handle my pain if I am off the Oxy completely. I think I can deal with my “usual” amount of chronic pain….but when I do something that aggravates that nerve, ughhhhh, my leg’s on fire. In the past, I have been prescribed several different meds that are supposed to help with nerve pain (Cymbalta, amitryptiline, etc.) but I’ve had to go off all of them due to side effects. BTW, I’ve had surgery for my back, but it didn’t help and there is nothing further surgically that can be done….all my disks are bad.

    If I could take the darn Oxy ONLY when I’m in severe pain, it would be fine….and that’s how it started out….but I ended up taking one every day, then 2-3 a day, then…you know how that goes. I’m not sure what to do…..I can’t avoid all situations where I’ll be on my feet, so this I am inevitably going to have bad flare-ups once in awhile. Anyone else in this situation?

    So now I'm back to Day 9 and am following the schedule again and taking it easy today....I'm so sorry, you guys.....I'm truly embarrassed.

     
    Old 03-26-2008, 09:07 AM   #5
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Don't be embarrassed! Everyone makes mistakes. Yesterday, at 6 days clean, I took 10mgs of Hydro. But, I learned from my mistake... and sometimes the laerning experience is all we can ask for at the time.

    You can do this! Just pick up where you left off & make it happen. I know that tapering is hard, especially when you have real pain issues (I do, too). I went through the tapering, it is possible to do. Best of luck to you...keep us updated!!

    Last edited by frazzled77; 03-26-2008 at 03:06 PM.

     
    Old 03-28-2008, 07:11 AM   #6
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Hey, Perky.
    How are things going with your taper? You've been on my mind since we both slipped a bit the other day. Please check in & let us know how things are going! Take care & stay strong!

     
    Old 03-28-2008, 08:29 AM   #7
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Perky, I am so with you on this. I have had the surgery and it helped a lot. I couldn't walk before. I was so stoned all the time on pain meds and arguably had a right to be at the time. Now I am just like you. If I do nothing. No lifting my grandbaby, no gardening, no hiking, no standing too long or shopping at the mall for more than an hour, no sitting too long, I can manage the "usual amoung of chronic pain" (thanks for the quote) but I have had to put off babysitting and it is breaking my heart. I ran into a friend at the grocery store, bad back, and there is nothing surgeon can do at this time for her back pain. She said she manages and then when it's bad she just takes a pill, rests and gets back to it. Why can't I do that? My trouble (let's blame someone for this besides me) was when they said stay ahead of the pain so duh, that meant getting up in the AM and first thing. Throw back a pill and get ahead of the pain. I want to be where my friend is where I get to a point, know it is bad, take care of my body and live my life the way I am suppose to. How do NotPerky and I get to that place? Help. Am I with you on this NP?
    RRR

     
    Old 03-30-2008, 05:46 PM   #8
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Hi all -- thank you so much for checking on me! I love you guys. When I last posted (Wed.), it was Day 9 of my taper but I had screwed up on Day 8 because of a bad pain flare-up. Well, once you screw up, it makes it easier or more tempting to do it again. So on Day 9, I also took more than I was supposed to. Then, on Thurs. and Fri., I had a family funeral with lots of hectic stuff going on....don't want to put in too much detail, but I was completely stressed and didn't want to be dealing with WD during all of that. Soooo, again I took more than I was supposed to.

    OK, so yesterday I'm back home and decide to get back on the taper schedule. I decided to try a Clonidine, which my PM has recommended to help with WD symptoms. UGHHH, I don't think I can ever take one again. My mouth felt like cotton and I felt like a zombie. I literally couldn't get out of bed til 6 PM. Now keep in mind, I am VERY susceptible to side effects, so others may not have any problem with this drug....but I felt awful. Maybe if the WDs are really bad, I'll take it again, but until then -- no way. Anyway, I used all that as an excuse to again take more Oxy than I was supposed to....was hoping it would "perk" me up....you know, any excuse will do.

    So now I am back on the taper schedule. I am a few days behind, but I am hoping to catch back up. The thing is, remember I had asked the doctor to cut my normal scrip in half....so, that's actually helpful because I won't have enough of a supply to go crazy. I do want to continue my progress -- I had felt so great last week that I was staying strong! The problem is, I don't know how I'll deal with the pain. I will end this post now because I want to get it on-line before everyone goes to bed! :-) I will post more later....but again, thank you so much for your continued support and understanding....no way could I do this without you guys.

     
    Old 03-31-2008, 02:01 PM   #9
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    It's Day 9 of my taper (not counting the days that I went off the taper schedule).

    I feel like crap. Chills, clammy, aching, yawning, headache. Bad, bad nerve pain in my leg. It's throbbing. I have to keep moving the laptop to try to get it off that leg.

    I'm down to 2.25 Oxy pills today, which equals 33.75 mg of Oxy. I took my noon dose at 11 AM. Waited til 3 PM for the next one. I can't believe a year ago, my normal dose was two or three 5-mg pills a day -- total 10-15 mg a day. But....the more I got....the more I took. I then asked for 15-mg pills rather than 5-mg capsules. My theory was, with the capsules I had to take either 5 or 10 mg....and I didn't want to take 10 mg at a time. With the 15-mg tabs, I could split them into 7.5-mg doses. But guess what I did eventually? I split them but took a half then a quarter -- totalling probably 10-12 mg. They're little tiny pills, so you don't feel like you're taking much. Anyway, if I do the math, I am now taking the equivalent of over SIX of the 5-mg pills....and that is a "taper" dose.

    People have talked about depression after getting off the pills. I am depressed being ON the pills. I think the more I've taken, the more depressed and lethargic I've gotten. I've cleary noticed a downhill slide in my housekeeping, personal care, relationships and activity level. That is why I feel I'm been a rock and a hard place. Stay on the pills? Physical dependency and depression. Go off the pills? Pain, no relief, and maybe more depression...? In my fantasy of being pill-free, though, I am happy and active again. I just hope I can get through this taper. My pain (leg on fire) makes it very easy to feel "justified" in saying screw it and pop an extra dose or two....

    Anyway, the original taper schedule had me reducing another 3.75 mg tomorrow. Since I blew it over the weekend and I'm feeling lousy, I think I will wait a few days to make that reduction.

     
    Old 04-02-2008, 06:38 PM   #10
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Wed. - Day 11 of taper: I've been on 33.75 mg oxycodone, split into four doses about every four hours, for three days. I was going to reduce another 3.75 mg (an 11% cut - hey, I'm learning, Reach!) tomorrow....now I'm not so sure. The weekend is coming and I have lots of stuff scheduled. I hate prolonging this, but maybe I should wait til Sun. When I wake up in the morning, I feel clammy/cold/sweaty and taking a few bits of that little extra quarter-pill help.

    I'm frankly afraid of a relapse this weekend. Although I do find that activity is a good distraction, physical activity worsens the pain. If I don't have it with me, I can't take extra....but I'm also afraid of being in horrid pain and just having to put up with it (I won't be home and I have to be a pleasant guest, not one in pain and WD!).

    On a brighter note, I was able to force myself to do a bit of cleaning and organizing the past few days, so the place is not quite as much of a disaster.

    Baja, no cigs in a week??? You just continue to amaze! Thanks again to all for your support.

     
    Old 04-02-2008, 07:06 PM   #11
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Hi Perky

    Don't make that cut until you are committed to maintaining it! A couple of more days one way otr the other isn't goping to matter much... the time between cuts is not as important as making sure that once the cut is made, it stays made.

    The depression drom being on the opiates... that was a huge side effect for me after prolonged use. They are depressants, just like alcohol is. Depress the central nerve system reactions along with all our other systems. In tapering, as we move along, it is good to tackle the depression at the same time. It is great that you were able to do a bit of cleaning and organizing. That is a wonderful sign of progress. The brain is healing as you taper, little by little, baby steps at a time.

    Yes, little bits of the pill can make a huge difference. Glad you are understanding about the percentages. Keep them as consistent as possible in a slow taper so that the body does not get thrown into cold turkey. taper and heal as we gho along.... that is what a taper is about.

    Best, best wishes.
    reach

     
    Old 04-02-2008, 07:21 PM   #12
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Perky,
    My Dr has always stressed to me to take as long as you need tapering to eliminate the chance of relapse. Dont beat yourselves up maybe just taper a little slower so you dont feel the wd when you do. Like I tell everyone when youre ready to taper intentionally run yourself short by 1 -2 days then when you do get your dose even a smaller one will feel good and youll be able to maintain this dose. Just a suggestion it worked for me from 20 Lt's a day to 100 mg of meth a day to 8 mg of sub a day and eventually 0 as of 2 days ago. Dont rush it. They say it takes 2 times longer than you were on opiods to taper and quit. Good luck and dont give up.If you have access to meth or sub maybe try that and it will give you time to break the mental addiction as there is no affects from either not to mention they both block any opiods from gaining access to your nerves thus discouraging any relapse. Suboxone is the way to go if you can get it and it is also only a partial opiod and withdrawl blocker (Bupe) and combined with naloxone to discourage abuse and Iv use as it will put you in instant withdrawl. Stay away from the meth if you intend on using the sub as anything above 30 mg a day causes problems while switching. the best of luck to you and stay strong


    djones

     
    Old 05-02-2008, 11:23 AM   #13
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    Re: My Taper Tale

    Hello all, I just wanted to update you on where I've been since I last posted a month ago. I had two funerals in two weeks, with a lot of stress and a lot of pain, and I ended up abandoning my taper. I'm back up to about 60 mg a day of Oxy IR. I'm going to ask the PM about an inversion table for my DDD -- anyone ever have success using that? I've tried everything but acupuncture, which I would try except there are no good practitioners in this area. Anyway, just wanted to let you know I'm still alive....but wasn't able to close the deal. At this point, I don't see myself trying to get off the Oxy again soon because of the chronic pain. I hope all of you are doing well -- I am anxious to get updated on all of your progress posts.

     
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