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eldogg 05-17-2008 12:54 PM

need help here PLEASE
hi I am a24 year old and have been taking morphine 100mg slow release caps;for about 4years straight,and now need to know <just how> am I going to make the withdrawl easier.its really the yawns and the jitters,pain and the feeling of boredom or something its hard to explain,but if any1 can help PLEASE do.

jerry111165a 05-17-2008 02:50 PM

Re: need help here PLEASE

Morphine is a strong drug,but you know that.I was actually using it for a while,3-4 50 mg Kadian caps a day myself.This is gonna be tough,but many of us have been there,done that. I did cold turkey off of morphine a couple years back and it werent fun. My first true physically addicted/dependant drug. I would have to suggest, if you could possibly switch slowly to a lesser opiate and then wean yourself off of that you might be better off. Might give you more of a fighting chance, and less apt to jump right back on the morphine.
First,tho,are you using these for pain or for pleasure?
I mean, are they prescribed,or just for "fun", like I was doing?
If they are in fact prescribed, I'd let the doc know right away your feelings on this.
If they are being used for "pleasure", then I'd have to slowly wean myself off of them. You may not want to do cold turkey, is a tough withdrawl. The good thing about cold turkey,tho,is it is out of your system faster,but,like I said,the withdrawls are more intense. 4 years is a long time. If in fact,like I said, they are being used for fun,you might want to see a doctor, spill your guts and see what he/she can do for you.
keep posting,give us some more info.

Good luck!


eldogg 05-18-2008 06:30 AM

Re: need help here PLEASE
hi again,thanks for giving interest in my,..I guess help add.just so you know the morph; is for pleasure,well i think I need it to feel me now,so not so much pleasure anymore.I also take percocet,endocet and tylenol 3's to go with the morp;but can go without them its really the phine;thats the problem its hard to keep a good relationship with.About the doctor would that blackball me so maybe in the future if I am in pain i willnt be able to get help with the rite meds?I would like to try and wean myself off but everytime I try I get rite back to it again the sickness is bad,I have to take a daily dose if I dont watch out it gets bad.

reachout 05-18-2008 06:54 AM

Re: need help here PLEASE

I am with Jerry on this... that is a powerful addiction you have and help is needed to withdraw and find a clean life again. And yes, it can be done, Friend. And your best bet is under a doctor's care.

Addiction is an old story and a common one for doctors to hear. While it is tremendously hard for us to muster the courage to spill our guts to a doctor, it is not hard for them to hear. They can get us the help we need and really, I have not found one doctor in my own journey who was not compassionate about my problem and more than willing to help me overcome the addiction. I worked with medical doctors, psychiatric doctors and social workers. I needed them all and I am so happy to say that I no longer abuse drugs of any kind. My life is whole again and yours can be, too.

And no, pain meds will not be held from you if ever a situation arises where they are needed. Some months after I had completely withdrawn from all narcotics, I ened up in an emergency room if bad, bad pain. First thing I did after descibing my pain was to straight out tell the emergency room doctor that I had withdrawn from pain meds because of abusing them. He didn't blink an eye. After the cause of my pain was determined, I was given 3 shots of morphine. I was sent home with a small script of Vicodin and handed it over to my Husband to dole out. After a couple, I didn't need them anymore for pain and ditched them. We keep our safety nets in place with total honesty.

No withdrawal is easy no matter what plan we work out with our doctors. However, as many, many on this board can attest to, it [U]is[/U]something that can be accomplished. You are a young man with so much life ahead of you. Take the bull by the horns and fight to ensure you have a good life and not one that is weighed down with narcotics. You can do this and we will be a part of your support system as you do.

best wishes

eldogg 05-18-2008 07:47 AM

Re: need help here PLEASE
the only thing is,is that i have a legitimate reason to take percocet, I am a chronic migraine sufferer have been for years and they are prescribed,but the morph; I really dont need,and I think that is what keeps me from ratting myself out,'cause I don't want it to interfere with my treatment.But now when I come off the phine; they seem more intense.this is the hardest thing I've had to face in my life and I hope it really does get easier,I am down to only two-three hundred mg's a day and want to try for only 50mg daily you guys got any suggestions on how to cut it down slowly,just enough to stave off sickness?thanks for the help!

DroopyEyes 05-18-2008 09:27 AM

Re: need help here PLEASE

this won't help with your question itself (sorry) but one thing I want to say about the headaches...I have TMJ and cycles of the headaches and one thing I found out just yesterday...dehydration is a huge culprit in headaches...I'm not a doc, but do want to say that I am a diet soda junkie and rarely drink water....the sodas are horrible for dehydration and I've begun drinking water in a 3:1 ratio to soda. I'm in a cycle of headaches this past week and maybe it's real, maybe it's imagined but the headaches are noticeably better since I started...

You don't have to be thirsty to be dehydrated.

My 2 cents, 2 litres and always support,


sorry - thought of something else ---- do you ever find that the percoset doesn't relieve your headache? I'm not talking tolerance, I'm talking dose that ususally helps? Because you could be having rebound headaches....

and re the morphine...ditto the doc kicked into HELP mode when I told her I no longer needed the drugs and wanted to stop...I know you-I are not the same situation but I think that generally docs don't judge - they want to help you get healthy.

jerry111165a 05-18-2008 11:33 AM

Re: need help here PLEASE
Eldogg, listen to Reach. You need to tell the doctor. Morphine is so strong...if you dont quit now its going to get worse and worse. I know I dont need to tell you that.
I must say that to confide in someone,like the doctor is exactly what you need and I bet you feel a huge sense of relief after you do. You obviously need some help on this,take it,do it,make an appointment with your doc. Like she said,he/she has seen this many,many times before. This is what they do,they are there to HELP us. You are going to need to taper off slowly,because if you dont,like you said,you just keep going back to it. This will help with the withdrawls. We all know what you're going thru. I am an addict. Most here are. We've all been there,done that, but by the grace of God,help from others we CAN beat this.
We can live a good life without worrying where our next fix,or pill,or hit is going to come from; live without worrying on a daily,or hourly basis are we going to be sick in 6 hoiurs because we didnt get our stuff...
This is an awful,awful vicious circle that can never be broken until we put our foot down,till we are just so sick of being sick, ask for and recieve help from God and other people. By the way,I'm not preachin' religion, I'm not super religious myself, but I do find that when I am way,way down,or even way,way up it doesnt hurt to ask for help. Or to give thanks.
We can maybe help you here,there are many,many godd,no,great people here that will be happy to,no,WANT to help you, but first you need to take that first step.
WANT to be clean.NEED to be clean. This is up to you.
We will all support you thru this and be your friend, if you want.

Take that first step.

Keep posting.Read alot here.

Peace, and God bless.
Grateful Jerry.

eldogg 05-19-2008 04:01 AM

Re: need help here PLEASE
I really have to say something here,if i may,... even in NA or detox,I've never had people try to help me like you guys..and gals have on this site and I appreciate it and respect you all for what you have gone through so thanks for being there.
droopy I have changed my lifestyle 'cause of the headaches water,salt,booze,you name it I changed it,rebound headaches are more like an after shock after an earthquake,and i have suffered from those,they are <really difficult> to stop but migraines are somewhat diff; in the way they start,ie numbness blurred vision ect.but you make a very good point,I drink tones of water & milk so i cant see it being dehydration,I had a couple of bad concustions when i was young thats what the doc thinks it could be.thanks for your input.jerry I really know I have to get help before this disease kills me and thats not what i want,but it takes alot of balls to tell a doc,and sometimes it feels like its easier to just keep going with the dope,but thats flawed thinking or the drugs talking I know but it is so hard to change especially after so long.
If you don't mind me asking how did you guys deal with the strong urges through the day the sickness i might be able to take but the want is so strong so over powering that its hard to say no to.
It gets harder to deal with family on this subject,very touchy topic,and some people just don't understand,any pointers do I deal with that?they know but don't think its this bad.I really hope that this site and the people here can be part of my support system 'cause I am going to need it soon,and by my short time on here I can already see that there are a very many good people here and I am thankful to have made my way here,must be for a reason I think and I am not very religious either but in this situation it might not hurt.
thanks for the help everyone its gonna be a long road.

jerry111165a 05-19-2008 06:08 AM

Re: need help here PLEASE
Eldogg,good morning.
There IS alot of good people here. The way I see it, so many have helped me here, I need to give it back, keep the good karma going, ya know what I mean?
Anyhow.Nobody said it was going to be easy, as far as telling a doc, or going thru the withdrawls, or having the cravings...It definetly is not easy. But you need to look at the big picture here. To keep going with the dope is much,much worse. I know. I was addicted phsically to opiates for years.
Wouldnt it be so nice to wake up after you've gone thru the inital steps oneday soon and say to yourself, " hey, I'm not addicted anymore and I feel great!" What a great feeling that is,buddy. Your body and mind will be free from the slavery of opiates, you will feel good about yourself, you will be smiling, my friend. Sometimes,yes, we need to do things we dont want to do or go thru, but at the same time sometimes things worth having are worth putting up with some negatives to get. Did i say that right? Anyhow,you know what I mean.
As far as dealing with the strong urges,and the withdrawls, I had to simply force myself. I knew I was going to continue to get worse and worse if I didnt stop using. I was sick of chasing the drugs, sick of being sick all of the time from not having any when I needed them, sick of worrying where my next batch of drugs were coming from, just sick of it all. I know you know what I mean here. I just knew enough was enough and forced myself to do whatever it took to get off of the dope.
We can and will be at least part of your support system, you can count on many here to help you thru this.
You mentioned not being religious "but it might not hurt".
Go find a quiet place away from everybody, get on your knees and ask for help. Really beg for help. Is as good of a start as you're going to get, nad no,it will not hurt and it really will help.

It is going to be a long road, and a bumpy one, but at the end there is peace and happiness.

keep posting, keep reading other peoples posts and most of all,like I said before,

See you soon.

peace and God bless.

eldogg 05-19-2008 12:22 PM

Re: need help here PLEASE
hello again to every1.and jerry I can tell you man i want this more than anything I've ever wanted,and have told my family this morning about it and they where very supportive,but still don't fully get it.
I told them that I was thinking of singing myself into the locale prescription drug abuse detox center and,am planning on making an appointment with my doc tomorrow. Its only 3:50 here and I am already up to 400mgs and physically my body can't take anymore,not to mention the mental depression that fallows this disease.I really owe it to the people that have talked to me in the short time I've been here{jerry,reach,droop,too}and i hope you will all be there when i get out for the guidence that i will surely need.
yeah jerry you said that rite and it makes good sense sometimes you gotta go through heck to get to the and reach gave me some good advice may not seem so but the smallest bit of encouragement really helps in this spot I'm in,but you know this i'll bet.but must go for now.P.S i have been reading alot here like you said and have found tones of tools and encouraging storys,hope it works for me to with all your help it just may,as I am to far in the country for any NA or other meetings.

jerry111165a 05-19-2008 01:10 PM

Re: need help here PLEASE
Eldogg,you rock,man.

Telling your family must have been sooooo hard, but what a relief!
And how could they get it unless they have been where we are, and where we have been.
Also,the appt. w/ your doc is so good,he/she is a professional and can help you much more than we can. Not that support isnt key,too.

You are coming into the mentallity that has helped me be clean, albeit for the short time that I have been. I gottta tell you,if it want for this board, I wouldnt be where I am right now. I'm in the same boat and owe much to the good folks here.

I can tell by your attitude you will be ok,my friend. I know you can do this and soon (relatively), we will both be smiling at your accomplishment.
You need to be strong. You need to want it as bad as I feel that you do.
You have made the first steps. Follow thru and before you know it you will not be bound by the evil that is addiction. Oh,we'll always be addicts,but we will not be feeling the pain,and the sickness,the unhealthiness and the bad vibes that will go with addiction.
I wake up with a smile on my face every morning and thank God for another clean day. There is hope,my friend. It is there waiting for you to grasp it and run with it. I know that you're ready,; I can hear it in your tone.

Please keep posting and know that you are among friends here that have gone thru what you are going thru right now.

Be strong.Know what you want and TAKE IT. Make yourself proud. Everything else comes second from here on out.



eldogg 05-19-2008 03:06 PM

Re: need help here PLEASE
you know jerry telling the family was hard but loosing what I've lost,ie:my girlfriend,almost all my friends then the ones I'll loose when i quit,my sex drive everything is gone 'cause of them,and because of you guys here,you gave me the boost I needed to do it,now its my turn to loose them.I hope the doc can wean me off for a week so I can get stuff in order then sign myself in.then with the help of family and this site I to hope to wake with a smile on my face to,knowing that I am finally free.You and reach both made me realize that I can't do this alone like I have tried so many-a-time and think I'll do it,...BONG..reality finally slapped me in the face,and it hurts,bad.
I hope that some day soon I can help the people of this site as you all have helped me, and thank God and all of you for that help,in the best way and that is helping,I think if that makes sense to any1
till next time yall,eldogg out.

reachout 05-19-2008 05:04 PM

Re: need help here PLEASE
Hi El

You are taking some big steps here. Good for you!

I was scared to tell my friends about what I was dealing with... uh, I was afraid to even tell myself for that matter! But you know, once I faced it with my doctor, there was such waves of relief that flooded over me. It was not my hidden secret anymore. I began to share with close friends and had nothing but support and compassion from them.

You are right when you write that the family does not understand the total extent of what we go through.... not in our addiction or in our withdrawals. I don't even believe that my beloved doctor truly understood what it was like for me. But that is okay. We have avenues of support like this board where others understand to the max what is happening with us. We need support from professionals who can help, support of family and friends to stand by us and support of other addicts who have been here, done this and know that there is a way out.

Eldogg, one of the biggest pieces of advice that I can give you as you begin your work to restore your life is that withdrawal is a process. It can get so emotional, so hugely emotional, for us. Expect that, but try at the same time to trudge through a process. Like learning to ride a bike... we teeter and totter and fall and get bruised, but in the end, after the process of learning, we can ride that bike. You are beginning a process of learning to live drug free. Your body and brain have to undergo a process of restoring themselves to a natural state. Understand that every symptom we go through in withdrawal is a symptom of [U]healing[/U]. As the healing takes place, the changes in thinking will come if we keep on working it. And as the thinking changes, our lives become richer and happier and fulfilling.

I am excited for you. Hope you are excited for yourself. Smiles. here's to a new beginning, Friend.

With hope always

eldogg 05-19-2008 05:06 PM

Re: need help here PLEASE
its 9:00 here and I am really getting sick now ,...and really want and could take one if I wanted to,but as a buddy on this site told me "want it more than anything in your life"and the best one for any1 else in this position "put your foot down and say I am sick of being sick all the time"I am going to force myself until the doc app:
THANKS again to you all!!

reachout 05-19-2008 05:15 PM

Re: need help here PLEASE

Try and stay strong, Buddy. I know it is pretty horrible. The first cut the doctor had me make in my taper was way too big and the cut was made from an opiate and a benzo at the same time. I went into full withdrawal and it lasted a week before I began to level out. I lay on that bed the first night paralyzed with fear. Totally paralyzed. I had no idea what was happening to me.

Our nervous systems go quite whacky as we withdraw. It is searching desperately for narcotics eveywhere it can think of in our bodies. It feels horrible, just horrible, but will not kill us. ( Benzos like Xanax are another story in withdrawal). By tomorrow or the next day, diarreha will plague you.

Have you read the second thread on this board? It is titled, "Sample Home Detox." Print it out and have someone go to the store and get the things to help you. The Immodium is especially helpful. Outside of helping with the bowel issues, which can be really out of control, it also contains some ingredient that will actually help calm us down. It helped me be able to rest a bit after taking it.

Keep posting, keep trying. You can do this and we will help you along.


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