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    Old 02-02-2009, 08:24 PM   #1
    Anonamommy
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    New here; Tapering hydrocodone

    Quick bakground...

    My name is Angie. I am married and have 5 kids.
    In Oct of 07, I developed pancreatitis and spent almost 3 months in the hospital. I eventualy had my pancreas removed. I have been home a year now. I was on tons of heavy duty iv pain meds in the hospital, and once i came home I was on Norco. I continued taking it for the past year , convinced it was for pain, but it was really pain I could handle without it. The last month things really went downhill and I was up to taking 7/day. I finally admitted I had a problem and went to my dr and also told hubby I needed his help to quit. I kept telling myself.. tomorrow, I'll taper tomorrow. I finaly gave up and told hubby he needed to hold my pills sine I ant control myself.
    Last Friday I had 5 pills, Sat and Sun 3 1/2 pills, and only 2 1/2 today. I feel really good. So I am kinda waiting for it to catch up to me. I have lots of supplements that Ive read about here. Right now I am only taking extra vit c,multi vit, and potassium and magnesium. I ordered all the other things in the thomas receipe online so they should be here tomorrow.
    Last year I tapered down to just 1 1/2 pills per day and then I couldnt handle the depression/anxiety/freak out and gave up, thinking theres nothing wrong with taking just a couple pills a day. But of course it quickly went up from there.
    So I am scared of getting down to just 1 and letting it go. I think part of the reason is its the last thing from my hospitalization that hasnt gotten better, and I am a bit traumatized from that whole experience. Its hard to explain.... Maybe I am looking at this as a closure?

    So thats my ramblings...

    My biggest fear is of the pain of withdrawals. I cant handle the restless legs/body and the god awful deep depression and uncontrollable crying. I am scared I'll cave and end up back at the pain dr getting more pills. and I am scared of living without my good friend.,the pills. I dont even know what normal is anymore.

    Thanks for reading!
    Angie

     
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    Old 02-02-2009, 08:39 PM   #2
    NotPerky
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    Hi Angie and welcome -- it's amazing how similar all of our stories are. I did the same thing when tapering in April. Told myself there was nothing wrong with taking a few pills a day. So I too gave up the taper. I am going SUPER-slowly this time, hoping that maybe I can avoid withdrawal altogether if I do it slowly enough. I pretty much can't function if I'm going through WD, and then it's too tempting to just pop a pill for relief. (I live by myself and have no one who can control the dispensing of my pills.) I really think I can do it this time, because I am sick to death of the Oxy controlling my life. Hope you can too!

     
    Old 02-02-2009, 09:06 PM   #3
    Anonamommy
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    My husband says thats the addict part of our brain saying, "oh a few pills a day doesnt hurt". Well, I thought I was gonna get by with just 2.5 pills today and now my legs are wiggling like crazy. So guess I'll take another half and try to go back down tomorrow.

    I know I wont avoid wds completely even by tapering slowly.. but I am hopeful it wont be as bad as last time I tried. I was thnking I cant take too much time tapering too slow or I'll be out pf pills, but I have a dr appt at pain clinic in 2 weeks, so depending on my progress, if I need to get more I will but only enough to continue a slow taper, of course from hubbys hand.
    Thanks for the welcome.

     
    Old 02-02-2009, 09:34 PM   #4
    NotPerky
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    Well, I've been on this stuff for going on six years....for legitimate pain issues, which is why I kept convincing myself I deserve to take them. I knew, as a former heroin addict in the 60's, I probably shouldn't take a narcotic but geez, this was a prescription so that made it different, right...? Well, one thing led to another, I kept taking more and more, and then couldn't even get out of bed without my pill. And not because of pain, but to relieve the hot/cold sweaty/clammy/jumpy feeling. I felt the same way as I did when I was late for the methadone clinic in 1975. I can't believe I got myself in this position again.

     
    Old 02-04-2009, 03:43 AM   #5
    mattw
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    I think in my case it was really good to realize the time-line of opiate withdrawal..

    For the first four days it's going to get progressively worse.

    Then after a peak of crappy symptoms it takes two weeks for things to gradually return to normal.

    It's a good 18 day commitment to get back to a semi-state of normalcy... I found it good to have it all marked out on a calendar so I knew there was an end in sight to the irrational miserable feelings.

    The really hard part of opiate addiction is what happens afterwards.. when you're NOT physically addicted. and you have a really hard day... The urge to pop a pill can be over the top. You can justify it away as just a couple of pills.. or one bag and that's it.. but the percentage chance is extremely high that that one bag will become 2, 4, 8... and you'll have to start from scratch with the 18 day detox again months or years later.. UGH.

    good luck to everyone.. you never catch the dragon.

    Matt (40 days sober on an 8 year addiction..)

    Last edited by mattw; 02-04-2009 at 03:45 AM.

     
    Old 02-04-2009, 04:33 AM   #6
    ANGELINMICHIGAN
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    Mattw

    Congratulations, you have done so well. You must be feeling great about yourself.

    Take care
    Lyn

     
    Old 02-04-2009, 07:59 AM   #7
    erie123
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    Its scary to think how nervous we get to think of withdrawls. But how easy it is to pop these pills. I even take one to go shopping, dinner,friends,even to get a haircut.Im just learning of my addication and relizeing i need to taper. Ive been reading and doing research on here and ill admit im scared to live without them. And i also am scared of withdrawls especially because i live at home and nobody knows but all of you on here.
    Good luck to you and me.

     
    Old 02-04-2009, 09:45 AM   #8
    TaCot
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    erie, If you do a very slow taper, the withdrawals shouldn't be as bad as you think. I tapered off of hydrocodone over a period of two months, and it wasn't bad. I think I had more anxiety with the thought of going without pills, and fearing the withdrawals, than the actual withdrawals were. I went through some depression for a couple of weeks after I quit, but it didn't last, just like none of the withdrawal symptoms do. I kept myself busy and tried to think of anything but the pills. I wish you well. TaCot

     
    Old 02-05-2009, 06:42 AM   #9
    Anonamommy
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    I agree- its the fear that is really getting me. I am SO scared of that awful depression. I had a few days of it when I tried once before and I cried nonstop.
    I am at 2.5 pills. DOing ok, feeling crappy, but I can handle it. I still have to work, and its hard to act normal. My husband got the calender out, scheduled out the taper. And I have an appt with the pain dr on the 16, I am going to get 15 more pills, but 5 mg, we can cut them in half to get even smaller dosage. I want to get down as low as possible before I stop. Now maybe this is overkill, but in my mind, I feel like it will help so....

    I am also scared of living without the pills. And part of it is I was drinking before I ended up in the hospital. So I went from a total drunk to almost dead, and then never dealt with the drinking issue. Just started right onto the pills and now I have to deal with being sober. Its really closing a chapter, but starting a new life. And its scary.

    Matt- your post was helpful. COngrats!

     
    Old 02-05-2009, 07:57 AM   #10
    Secrets1983
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    Welcome Anonamommy,

    You have come to the right place. I remember being in your situation not that long ago and it was tough... I was on oxycontin and oxycodone for over a year probably.... Then they figured out what was wrong with me and out came the gallbladder.. So I knew... It was time for me to let go of the pills.. The addiction was raging and I knew that I needed to make a change and fast! So... I asked my Dr. for a taper plan... In 3 weeks I was pill free... Everyone deals with this situation differently but for me... I had w/d the entire 3 weeks.... It was miserable.. i had to go to work thru it and keep on moving... With determination and of course the help of this board I did it. I remember tossing and turning that whole 3 weeks... my legs I wanted to rip off my body and throw them at my bedroom wall... It just plain sucked.. Then after the physical part of the w/d went away.... the mental ones came in!! I was depressed and had such anxiety but that too passed after a couple weeks....

    I am not going to lie.. The whole process sucked big time and I still struggle with cravings.. BUT.... Life is good now.. I KNOW I can make it with out my old best friend the pills.. I never thought I could but looking back now... I am so happy I believed enough in myself to do it!

    That is the problem with pills.. They make you FEEL and REALLY believe that you can't do it... so that is why you have to dig down deep within yourself and take the leap because if you keep listening to your brain.. (which is on drugs) it will always tell you that you can't.. Your husband is right about it being the addict part of your brain thinking! It sounds like you have great support from him so that is a HUGE thing in it's self!

    Stick around and we will help you thru this! You can do this but unfortunetly... you are going to have to go thru w/d to get to the finish line! We are here for you! You will be in my thoughts and prayer!!

    ~Secrets

     
    Old 02-05-2009, 08:37 AM   #11
    TaCot
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    Anonamommy, What you are doing is NOT overkill. I tapered until I was down to 1/2 of a pill as well. I took 1/2 pill for three days, even though I was scheduled to do this for a week. After the third day, I thought, I don't need this 1/2 pill. I didn't get the high any longer with the 1/2 pill, so I quit after taking 1/2 pill for three days. I started out taking 6 hydrocodones per day. Every Monday, I dropped 1/2 pill per day and did that for seven days, (2nd week, I took 5 1/2 pills per day for 7 days, 3rd week, I took 5 pills per day for 7 days), and so on. And, I didn't withdraw much at all at the end. The depression wasn't fun, but I kept telling myself that this too shall pass. I also told myself that a little depression was better than being on the pills.

    Hang in there. You can do this. You are in my thoughts. TaCot

     
    Old 02-13-2009, 04:30 AM   #12
    subtrain
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    Re: New here;Tapering hydrocodone

    This is so true in my case. A time-line was and still is after 23 days one of the most helpful things I did. Your discription is pretty much exactly how I felt going through c/t from 4mg of sub to nothing. Also reading from everyones experinces was a BIG help. JUst to have an idea of what I was going to experience was a comfort. Thanks to all for sharing!

     
    Old 07-27-2010, 02:03 AM   #13
    Jong2
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    Re: New here; Tapering hydrocodone

    I know this i an old thread but felt that I should reply anyway in hopes that perhaps simply writing would help.

    I have been on Hydro 10/325 for several years... lets say up to 6-8 pills per day. About a week ago i decided to taper and have taken it down to 3-4 day. Next week I plan on even less and so on. I really just got tired of it controlling me. And as much as everyone had mentioned on here I couldn't leave the house without it. I have to take one to to get up and start my day... lay in bed until it took effect and then shower. Couldn't function without it. Hoping I could do this without the help of my doctor but if not I plan to seek his guidance.

    I do feel some w/d - achy muscles, feverish, twitchy leg etc... Hoping that these symptoms will subside as I take less and less. I will try the vitamin supplements that was suggested on here maybe that would make it easier.

    Thank you all for all the posts as reading everyone's experiences helps me anticipate what's in store.

     
    Old 07-27-2010, 03:14 AM   #14
    Jong2
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    Re: New here; Tapering hydrocodone

    OH... and btw... sleep has been quite the challenge. So i have been taking Zolipidem Tartrate to aide me in dozing off. I guess it counters the hydro.

    It acts rather quickly (within a half) but if you miss the window you're up for even longer...grrrr!

    Business has been brutal. Having to close one shop a year and a half ago and on the verge of closing another! Seriously thinking of shutting down this week. I'm sure the economy has not helped ANYONE!

    Well the reason i mentioned this because I am also feeling slightly depressed but was wondering if it was caused by the tapering of the Hydro or by the economic downturn?!!! (lol) OR BOTH! I don't feel like getting on any depression meds at this point and want to get off the hydro first. Do you think it is necessary? Its the fatigue that is slowing down my productivity the "feeling sorry" for myself i think is easily overcome but i do need the strength for it.

    Soooo confused!

     
    Old 07-27-2010, 01:27 PM   #15
    musicman3
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    Re: New here; Tapering hydrocodone

    Tapering or going cold turkey from opiates will definitely cause depression so that is normal especially with your other issues going on. I have found that after a few weeks of being clean that the depression will definitely lift. You really have to work at being sober and have a positive state of mind. The chemicals and endorphins in your brain really need to reset and from research, there is evidence that they will start to repair themselves over time. So it is very important that you keep strong and realize that is a temporary situation and it will get better.

     
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