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  • Day #1 no vicodin. HELP!



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    Old 09-16-2010, 06:17 AM   #1
    mustanggirl
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    Day #1 no vicodin. HELP!

    I have been taking vicodin for 3 years. I started with 2 pills once a day and I am now taking up to 10 pills daily. I started taking it originally for back pain. I still have the back pain, but I know I am also taking the pills to get a high. I am so sick of the dependance. I have a great husband and 2 kids. And I just told my husband yesterday about my vicodin habbit. He is very understanding. Today I stopped cold turkey. A bottle of vicodin is just a phone call away for me and this is so hard! I am achey, sneezing, I have nausea, diarrhea, and my back hurts so bad I wish I could cut my spine out! I don't know if I can do this! I took 2 imodium, a 500mg naproxen and 2 tylenol. I really need some encouragement!

    Last edited by mod-anon; 09-19-2010 at 08:21 AM. Reason: merging threads

     
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    Old 09-16-2010, 05:00 PM   #2
    twerpee
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    Re: Day #1 no vicodin. HELP!

    Mustanggirl - I feel for you and what you are going through but please stay strong. You should be proud of yourself for recognizing that you are using your pain meds to get high. However, as a recovering addict (almost 8 years clean), I hope you speak to your doctor about this. If you truly want to kick this addiction, it starts with honesty. And you might need medical help to get through your withdrawals and your legitimate back pain.

    While going through rehab, I had a no-nonsense counselor who told us like it is. So, I'm going to tell you what she used to tell us - it sucks to be you right now and you have a long way to go until you are completely well. But you WILL get well and you can beat your addiction - one day at a time. At times, you will have to struggle to get through the next five minutes, and then the next five, and so on. But I know if you stay strong, pray like crazy, and have the support of your husband, you will beat this. The best advice I can give you is to get through one day at a time and talk about what you are going through. Keep a journal and write in it every day.

    I will keep you in my prayers and I know you will be successful!! I'll be watching for other posts from you to see how you are doing. You could always post here with your progress, I'm excited that tomorrow will be day two for you. You go girl!!

    Last edited by twerpee; 09-16-2010 at 05:01 PM.

     
    Old 09-17-2010, 08:26 AM   #3
    mustanggirl
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    Re: Day #1 no vicodin. HELP!

    Thank you so much for the advice and the prayer. I need it so bad right now! I made it through the entire day yesterday. I was in so much pain yesterday and last night, I didn't think I'd make it. I took an ambien last night and slept really well. In fact, I slept from about 6:30 last evening until 6:30 this morning. Besides waking up a few times with hot flashes, I slept pretty good. I can't believe how good I felt this morning. My back doesn't hurt as bad as it did yesterday, but my hands are shaking, my mouth tastes like I swallowed a cotton ball, and I'm freezing! And I think the worst thing of all is I can't stop thinking about taking vicodin! I am trying to keep myself busy, but its driving me crazy! I know what you are saying too about telling my Dr. That situation is kind of sticky. I worked with my Dr for the past 3 years. I went to him with my back issue and he put me on the vicodin. Ever since that he has just been handing me scripts. I quit my job and moved 5 hours away! I have been where I am now for only a month. I have called him twice for the vicodin and he calls it in for me. I know him personally so well and I'm afraid to tell him about my addiction problem. And honestly, he has to know. I mean, he has been handing me scripts for so long. I really don't think he cares. There is also a part of me that thinks "what if I need it again some day" I know that is so not the way I should be thinking, but I can't help it. I'm trying so hard to overcome these thoughts that I need pain medication. I feel like my body is adjusting, but my brain isn't there yet. Are these thoughts ever going to go away?!?!?!?!?!?!?

     
    Old 09-17-2010, 09:27 AM   #4
    mustanggirl
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    Day #2 no vicodin! Mind is racing!

    I made it through day #1. Can't believe I did! I thought I was dying! I woke up this morning feeling really good. My biggest issue is I can't stop thinking about it. My back hurts, but it is tolerable. My hands are shaky, my mouth is dry, and I can't sit still. But I just wish the thoughts of wanting the vicodin would go away! I am doing this on my own, with the support of my husband. No medication to help me through withdrawl. I can handle the physical part, but I want the craving to go away!

     
    Old 09-17-2010, 01:52 PM   #5
    mickeyluver
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    Re: Day #2 no vicodin! Mind is racing!

    Hi Good job!! Is it that you dont want to have anything for the cravings? I know how hard it is and your pretty strong to do it without anything to help through everything!! I had to take suboxone to help me out after getting off the vicodin after years off taking it for many hernia's, and back problems. Good luck and keep up the good work

    Sue

    Last edited by mod-anon; 09-17-2010 at 11:00 PM. Reason: removed quote

     
    Old 09-17-2010, 02:47 PM   #6
    mustanggirl
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    Re: Day #2 no vicodin! Mind is racing!

    Thank you! How long have you been off of the vicodin? I wish I did have something to help me with the craving part. The only reason I don't is because my Dr. (the one who has mainly been prescribing the vicodin) was my boss for the last 3 years. It is a small Dr office and I don't want anyone to know about my addiction. I quit my job and moved out of state to get away from this. Since I have been in my new home, I've called him twice and he calls in the vicodin. So its just such a crappy situation for me. Its so easy for me to get. I don't know what to do. If these cravings don't go away soon I may just have to find another Dr. But I would really rather do this on my own. How long do you think the cravings will last? I found myself today rooting through cabinets! I hate this! I can deal with the physical part but this mental stuff is getting to me!

    Last edited by mod-anon; 09-17-2010 at 11:01 PM. Reason: removed quote

     
    Old 09-17-2010, 07:12 PM   #7
    mickeyluver
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    Re: Day #2 no vicodin! Mind is racing!

    First off..YOU CAN DO IT!!!! I have been off of them for about 8 months. Thats amazing your dr can still call a narcotic into another state?? So why did you call him when you got there if the whole point behind you getting away from there was to not have it? As for myself, the addictive personality I have, I think cravings will always be there in away. But the begining hard part of them type of cravings lasted 2-3 weeks for me. STAY OUTTA THE CABINETS!!! lol You have to keep busy so your mind is accupied and not thinking of them lil demons!! Yes it is very hard but YOU CAN get through it!! Keep up with doing it on your own if you can, and if you need medical help, then just be honest and tell them everything and they will do whats right and best for you!! Keep posting and vent whenever, however, and how ever long you need to type away!!

    Later,Sue

    Last edited by mod-anon; 09-17-2010 at 11:01 PM. Reason: removed quote

     
    Old 09-18-2010, 05:23 AM   #8
    mustanggirl
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    Re: Day #2 no vicodin! Mind is racing!

    Thanks Sue! I so appreciate your encouragement! This is the only place I'm finding I can really vent and get some good advice. Well, I moved for other reasons as well, but the main reason was to get away from the easy access to vicodin. Unfortunately I gave in when I got here and didn't think I could do it. So I had him call it in for me. The second time I went to pick it up at the pharmacy, the pharmacist gave me a lecture about how much I was taking. And I could tell what they thought of me. I became a seeker! So I said I was done. I still have a script sitting at the pharmacy and I am trying so hard to stay strong and not even think about picking it up! My husband said maybe he should pick it up and flush them. But that one part of my brain is telling me to keep it "just in case" So dumb, I know. But I am on day 3 and physically I feel great.

     
    Old 09-18-2010, 05:29 AM   #9
    mustanggirl
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    Day #3 no vicodin!

    So, I'm starting my third day without any vicodin. I can't believe I made it through the first two. I slept so good last night. Better than I have in months! My back is a little achey, but not bad. I don't have a craving yet, but by afternoon I'm sure they will be back. I'm going to stay as busy as I can! I still have 60 vicodin sitting at a pharmacy to be picked up. I still have this evil little voice in my head telling me to keep them "just in case" My husband wants to get them and flush them. I know I should, but what if? Is that stupid?

     
    Old 09-18-2010, 07:47 AM   #10
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    Re: Day #2 no vicodin! Mind is racing!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by mustanggirl View Post
    Thanks Sue! I so appreciate your encouragement! This is the only place I'm finding I can really vent and get some good advice. Well, I moved for other reasons as well, but the main reason was to get away from the easy access to vicodin. Unfortunately I gave in when I got here and didn't think I could do it. So I had him call it in for me. The second time I went to pick it up at the pharmacy, the pharmacist gave me a lecture about how much I was taking. And I could tell what they thought of me. I became a seeker! So I said I was done. I still have a script sitting at the pharmacy and I am trying so hard to stay strong and not even think about picking it up! My husband said maybe he should pick it up and flush them. But that one part of my brain is telling me to keep it "just in case" So dumb, I know. But I am on day 3 and physically I feel great.
    GREAT!!! DONT get it!! If you feel great then leave it be!! Keep busy and dont think about it and you will be just fine Do you have kids or animals?? I found that my 2 kids and 2 dogs helped me alot and kept me busy!! Hope you stick through it and stay strong!! BTW, I LOVE MUSTANGS!!!

     
    Old 09-18-2010, 08:56 AM   #11
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    Re: Day #3 no vicodin!

    mustanggirl,

    Congrats on Day#3! You've got a great attitude. I found that in early recovery keeping busy is the best thing to do. It's not always easy, but keeping your mind and body occupied can really help with the cravings.

    It's wonderful that your husband is there for you. My husband has been so supportive right from the day he found out about my pill problem. He said he just wanted ME back. I think your guy has the right idea, pick up those pills and have you flush them. Don't think about the "what if". If you feel you really need them in the future for legitimate pain, get a new doc or maybe even pain management.

    Have you thought about attending NA meetings? I was reluctant to go at first, but it really helps to hear from others that have similar problems and a place to share how you're feeling.
    I haven't put a mind or mood altering substance in my body for over 17 months. I can't believe it's been that long. It hasn't always been easy, but that's life. You have to enjoy it, one day at a time.
    I'll be watching for your posts. Let everyone here know how you're doing. This is wonderful place for support. Take care. You can do this!

    Kitty

     
    Old 09-18-2010, 09:08 AM   #12
    mustanggirl
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    Re: Day #3 no vicodin!

    OMG! It scares me so much to think about ME flushing them! It probably is the best thing I could do right now, but it is really scarey to think about. I have thought about meetings. I live in such a small town now and I'm not sure where exactly to start. I know I need the support of others though. 17 months is awesome! I really can't wait to get there! If I can just beat the cravings I think I'll be okay. They sure are getting to me Thank you for your support! I will keep posting.

     
    Old 09-18-2010, 09:15 AM   #13
    mustanggirl
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    Re: Day #2 no vicodin! Mind is racing!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by mickeyluver View Post
    GREAT!!! DONT get it!! If you feel great then leave it be!! Keep busy and dont think about it and you will be just fine Do you have kids or animals?? I found that my 2 kids and 2 dogs helped me alot and kept me busy!! Hope you stick through it and stay strong!! BTW, I LOVE MUSTANGS!!!

    I have 2 kids. And they are keeping me busy! And again, my husband has been awesome. I'm doing as much as I can to occupy myself. This is so hard! I'm determined to get better though. I can't believe how evil narcotics can be! I have a 1969 fastback. Its my baby!

     
    Old 09-18-2010, 02:49 PM   #14
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    Re: Day #3 no vicodin!

    Just chiming in to tell you that you are doing a great job. Day by day, you're winning!

     
    Old 09-19-2010, 06:31 AM   #15
    mustanggirl
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    Re: Day #3 no vicodin!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by resolution09 View Post
    Just chiming in to tell you that you are doing a great job. Day by day, you're winning!

     
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