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The downward spiral...

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Old 12-28-2010, 12:59 AM   #1
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Torrington, CT, USA
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WoundedBird HB User
The downward spiral...

I don't know where to begin. My boyfriend of almost 3 years has a serious addiction to pain killers. He says he takes (snorts?) percocet and vicodan. I didn't even know about it until about a year ago. I just thought he was cheating on me. The lies, cover-ups, leaving the cell in the truck so I don't know when his "friends" call, meeting up with strangers, weird ATM withdrawls, over drawing the account.....the pin-hole eyes, sweating, vomiting, diarrhea, irritation, but most of all the emotional distance he has when he's binging is getting to be too much. He spends all of his time "hanging out with his friends" (doing pills), and doesn't talk to me anymore. When I do finally say something to snap him (momentarily) back into reality, he just cries for hours about how he "knows" and hates it but doesn't know how to stop. He tries to stop cold turkey, but his whole body hurts, and he gets irritable, and sick. He will sleep for days at a clip. Then as soon as his back hurts one day, or sees that certain friend, it starts all over again. He's afraid to seek professional help because he's on his father's insurance and he doesn't want his parents to know (He's almost 22, but he's allowed on it because of a medical condition). I got to a point tonight where I said screw it, and was going to call someone in his family to tell them and maybe have an intervention of sorts, but I don't know what I'm doing, and I figured I would push him away. As a side note, yes I love him. More than I could express, and leaving is not an option. I could go on all night, but here's my intro. Can someone give me some advice on a next step? Thank you for reading.

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Old 12-31-2010, 05:43 PM   #2
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Canada
Posts: 371
corissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB Usercorissa3 HB User
Re: The downward spiral...

It would be a great world to live in if everyone expressed the kind of love and devotion you have shared with us as to your feelings for him.

You came here for answers and guessing by his age I would assume you are probably the same, if not yonger. You did answer your own question and that is a testament to your devotion for him.

Look at it this way.... if he were choking on something, you would call 911...if he were bleeding to death, you d call 911.

Well, he is choking and he is "bleeding" to death.... but think of his family as 911.

I think you get my point.

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WoundedBird (01-02-2011)
Old 12-31-2010, 06:29 PM   #3
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ohio
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resolution09 HB Userresolution09 HB Userresolution09 HB Userresolution09 HB Userresolution09 HB Userresolution09 HB Userresolution09 HB User
Re: The downward spiral...

I actually think he's telling you what to do. Sure, he doesn't want his family to know. No one wants to have to be embarrassed with a public outing regarding any of their personal issues. But he's told you he can't do this on his own and, if they are brought into the loop, he can get the help he needs.

In theory, if he takes the help and gets better he will love you even more for caring enough to take a big chance and bring him back to life. If he doesn't take the help, then you are going to have to make some hard choices about your future with him. Just in case that fact is holding you back (whether it's a conscious thought or not), push it aside and work with his family to get him help. If you don't take that risk, there could be some serious consequences.

You're a good person who loves him. He's lucky to have you. I agree w/ corissa. You know what you have to do.

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WoundedBird (01-02-2011)
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