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Spaz50 09-13-2011 05:30 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Tuesday Morning,
Not much sleep but not as bad as expected. Maybe 4 hours. I am at work, and just took 15 mgs of oxycodone. A little earlier than usual and less than the usual 25. Oxycodone taper is going well, but guess I am compensating buy not tapering the oxycontin as quickly. I have to be able to work this week and if get into Wd's like Friday night and Sat a.m. there is know way I could work. So after only 20 mgs of codone yesterday I took 40 Oxycontin. I guess I know I am nearly out of Codone so makes it easier to taper. Will be out in 4 days if I stick to 15 mgs a day. Then I will taper the contin for the next week or so. This does help, putting it into type, and seeing it. Also the support from you that respond is huge. Thank you. Now, Kat, I am doing pretty well and the wd's are very tolerable. Of course I am making that so by controlling them. As for continuing to be strong, we will see. Even on the meds I have to sneak off and grab a seat due to back pain and spasms. Occasionally just have to get off feet. They prefer not to SEE us sitting even though, working in maintenance, unless something breaks down we are standing at our tool boxes doing this or reading the news. Not a bad gig if you can get So i am blessed to have this job. Very high tech, automated, 1000 robots to worry about. I am concerned about the level of pain, but have no idea really, how bad I will hurt now that I AM MOSTLY HEALED FROM THE FUSION.ooops. Anyway, I will find out soon, as I am determined to be the man my wife fell in love with once again. I do know being in pain all the time has its own side effects. And they are not pretty either. So will hopefully find out that I don't hurt that bad anymore. Thank you for your prayers and I too pray for you. May god bless all of you with an incredible and new life as he has me in the past 18 months.

Spaz50 09-15-2011 05:35 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Missed work yesterday, Had a bad night. Tapering isn"t working to well, as I am missing work anyway. So, I am ready to dispose of all meds and miss work all at once. Feel sick all at once and get on with whatever quality of life I end up with. Have to work Saturday, then I think I will begin the rest of my recovery and do no more pills. Will just stay home and not go away as I had planned. Wife will be out of town for few days so maybe I can just sleep it away. Will take last dose Saturday A.M.. Will go to church Sunday. Love the church I go to and haven't missed in year and a half if I am in town. Well I did miss once when sick. Seems so many people are making same hard decisions I am. Analyzing the quality of life and doing best to do whats right for them. Still not sure of diffrence between addiction and dependancy. Think it is just simantics ! I have really noticed a decrease in my desire to take the meds. The cravings or whatever. Getting really frustrated with tapering as I cannot afford to miss a day ever week or 2. $200 every day I miss. Putting a real strain on us financially. Well, Goodluck to all of you going through same issues as me. God bless you all with the strength and support you need to be successful, and if you slip up, the resilience to try again. This I ask in the name of our Lord.

Spaz50 09-15-2011 10:32 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Have 20 mgs of oxycodone left. And I am afraid a lot less Contin than I thought. I split scripts up so keep some at work and some home. Turned bottle up at work and found only 1 oxycontin and the 2 oxycodone. Haven't had any oxycodone at home for a week I guess. So have been tapering what I had left at work and taking that dose in A.m. . Then the 20 to 40 mg Contin
at dinner time every evening. So the taper is about to end abruptly, as I am not going to
keep tapering when I feel as I do now. Got less than hour of sleep last night, and at work and really just want to go home. Aching everywhere, especially hamstrings and thighs, Lower back. Headache. Again, will try to work through 2 more days. Will be out of oxycodone and will flush oxycontin. Just read through Not perkies taper post and I have to say I admire her for being precise and sticking to a scheduled taper. Somewhat scheduled anyway. But funny how she seperated dustballs. Congratulations NP. Hope you are still enjoying life without pills. I'll be jumping off after 20 mg for today, and 10 mgs next 2 days of codone, and 40 mgs contin for past few days. I can't imagine dealing with Taper wd's for 2 months. Going to take last 10mgs Saturday. Then will see what wd's really are. Prescription for failure? I hope not. Really getting nervous though.

katlin09 09-15-2011 08:49 PM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Tony your awesome and your doing great work. Trust me you are not a failure or anything slightly resembling one. Please be careful when you stop the meds altogether, please make sure there is someone at home with you and this can be dangerous, and if it comes to that you need someone who can get you to the hospital. You have to remember, just like food and water these meds are something your body relies on having adjusts around them and adjusts all of your internal systems.

I'm keeping you and your family in my prayers, you can beat this I honestly believe that, I just want you to be safe.

Stay safe and hang in there,


chu38ck 09-16-2011 06:01 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
I have been in your shoes and i dont want to be there again. I was taking hydrocodone for about 2 1/2 almost 3 yrs and I was taking up to 10 -12 daily based on my script, I was also almost 400lbs. i have always had a high tolerance to meds anyway. I was taking my last few and it was a holiday week,dr. office closed, no refills unless it was heart meds ect... I ran out and had to call in work the next day as felt the worst flu like symptoms ever. i laid in bed for 3 days til that night round 3am and i was able to get up and get a glass of tea. i was dependent not addicted, i was fine after the 4th day. i guess it was a detox. my parents offered me some pain meds but i said no, i was half way through, i wanted off the meds for good. i was good until 6 months later i had another knee surgery and i got on them again, this time i was given methadone for pain. it was way different, i was only taking 4 a day at first and now down to 2 a day, if i go w/o for days at a time i do not withdraw, just take it when my pain really gets bad. I know you can pull through, just drink crap loads of water and gatorade, and eat soup. u will have diarhea but that will pass. once u get through this you wil feel like a new man, i promise. and u can be rid of the pill, finally.

chu38ck 09-16-2011 06:43 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
I had to go without my pain meds, hydrocodone for 5 days and i went through withdrawals, not fun, but worth it in the end. I used o take 10-12 daily based on tolerence build up after alost 3 years of taking them. decided to go through wd's even though my parents had offered me some s they wouod not see me suffer, it was the worst flu I ever had. I know that if and when you do the detox you will make it, just takes some pain and suffering for about 3-4 days. I was taking the 10-500 and 10-725 for all that time and i know now that that was not the right thing but the body becomes dependent, your not addicted. just remember that when your detox is over you will feel normal if not better then when you were popping pills. I can assure you of that, if you stil suffer from chronic pain ask your dr. for Methadone, i had another surgery 6 mos after gettng off hydro. and they gave it to me in hospital ad when i wewnt home, i saw my rhumatologist and he changed me to 10mg methadone x 2 daily. I do not crave them or need them. if i missed a day or two it was ok because u dont go through wd's. it work and the meds last a lot longer then the other opiates.

Spaz50 09-16-2011 09:01 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Appreciate your responses. Definately at a point where I need support and encouragement. At work now, took 15 mgs about an hours ago. Have 25 left, somehow. lol must have missed one when counted few days ago. Or my luck they reproduce. Defiantely flu like symptoms. been busy today so that hasn"t helped but time is going quicker. So looks like 10mg sunday a.m. will be last dose. luccky I guess, 1 more day of taper. wondering if I should taper the oxycontin for a week or until gone. Not sure how many I have left at home. None here at work. could go to 1 pill a day for few days (20mgs). then cut in have and do 10 for few days then stop. Am I chickening out? Think I said this while back. Excuse to continue taking or safest way to taper. Will see how it goes.

Spaz50 09-16-2011 09:46 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Is bad spelling a symptom of wd's? Just reread my Pathetic.

second go 09-16-2011 12:45 PM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
yeah, I think you are smart to taper the oxys's as well. just to refresh my memory, are you taking oxycodone and oxycontin? because they are basically the same thing. You seem to be determined to start ridding yourself of these pills, thats awsome.

how many of the oxys do you have at home, and do you still have a script when that runs out? And how much have you been tapering down? I guess I should just go back a few pages and read for myself. Its the safest to taper in small increments (someone on the boards has a good method for this, maybe they can post it again). Youll find that once you decide to stop, your body and mind will do nearly ANYTHING for more, so it would be best for you to taper down until theyre gone or get rid of them safely.

One thing to remember is that there will be very difficult moments, I remember one morning, probably day 4 or 5, where I almost felt incapacitated and couldnt move around much. It scared me, and I just want you to be prepared. I remember thinking that I wanted to drive to get a pill, but didnt have the energy to get to my car. In these moments it is smart to have a good friend/family member to speak with and keep you focused and/or to help you if you feel the need to check in with doctor or hospital (better safe than sorry I always say). That day was the worst one for me, and the fatigue lasted maybe a couple hours.

The hardest part for me was not knowing what to expect. I didnt know how long I would feel that way. If I knew that my physical detox was at its peak on day 4, it would have eased my mind somewhat. But I thought I might feel that way for weeks, and that gave me more anxiety than I really needed.

Have you ever seen the movie 'Cast Away'? (warning: movie spoiler haha). Well in the movie, Tom Hanks is trapped on a deserted island, and he cant sail his little raft away because the waves surrounding the round island keep crashing inward. He tries and tries...At the end, he finally gets over a large wave and is shortly after saved. Well day 4/5 for me was like this wave; once I was able to get over it, the rest was manageable.

Im sure youre on the right track and wish you the best of luck.

Spaz50 09-17-2011 05:25 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
I have gone in 2 weeks approx. from 60 to 80mgs oxycodone to 0 as of today.
Had 20 mgs left yesterday and decided to take it over the day, Bad day, was tapered, if you want to call it that, to 15 mgs a day for few days. Am out of the oxycodone. I have about 20 of the 20 mg oxycontin left. Have been taking 20 to 40 mgs a day since tapering the oxycodone. And I actually took same before starting taper but with the 60 to 80 mgs oxycodone. So, haven't tapered much although several days I took just 20 mg. So I could easily drag this out another 30 days rather than flush the remainder. I really hate to drag this out as I feel pretty lousy at the taper I am at. One side of me wants to just quit now and suffer the 4 or 5 days. The other doesn"t really want to quit. Thats the evil side of So I am really wanting to ignore that part of me that says to drag it out as long as possible. Very hard to know what is right way. I think for me, seeing as how I have cut by 60 to 80 %
of my starting dose in 2 weeks, want to just quit. Before I get any weeker and get another script, I have no more scripts to refill and have to drive 30 minutes to my Pain specialist. So not that inconvenient especially seing as how it is excuse to take my Harley for nice ride. :-) Wife will be gone for at least 2 more days so am alone which , in my mind is a good thing but I do know thats not what you friends here say. So thats where I am at on this Saturday morning at work. Thanks Second. Good to know what to expect
so I don't freak out on day 4 or 5. Over the Take care friends !!!

Spaz50 09-17-2011 05:40 AM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Hmm, just wanted to clear up a math issue. Looks like I did 40 mgs codone yesterday to finish up the taper. Really blew that huh. Oh well, good reason to flush the rest as I will screw up and not taper as I should and will then just be delaying for another week or 2. I'm done with it. I know I will fail if I put it off. Starting to have doubts in myself.

katlin09 09-17-2011 04:22 PM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without

You are doing so well with this, I know it's hard for you to see it in yourself, but so many others have failed at what your doing. just keep doing what your doing and believe me nobody is going to think that your not doing great. You've come so far from where you were a couple of weeks can do this.

Take care and hang in there.


Spaz50 09-17-2011 04:49 PM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Thanks Kat,
It is so easy to start justifying things and making excuses. So easy to forget
why the decision was made to stop taking the pain meds. I am to young to feel as I have for several years. I have so many times wondered how , if I feel so lethargic and have so little energy now, how will I feel in another 10 years. Not an option. Have to get my life back. So thank you. Your support is needed and appreciated. Today was it. haven't taken the step to dispose of remainder, but I need to.

reachout 09-17-2011 05:08 PM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
Hi Spaz

Just had to add some kudos here for all your effort. :-) You are doing it.

As I went through withdrawal, although mine was a long taper, I kept reminding myself it was all a process with a beginning [U]and an end[/U]. It helped me to realize that. Understanding the process and knowing what to expect makes it more acceptable.

When I had my first child, I was so not prepared. It just made the whole process of childbirth so much harder and more frightening. By the second one, I had researched more and understood what was happening to my body in delivery. Didn't stop all the pain, of course, but I was much more collected mentally and did not have the blind panic of the first time.

The sneezing, the diarreha, the anxiety, the muscle and bone aches... these are all functions of the body restoring its various systems. It is not pleasant, but it is a sign of the final end... body and mind restored... almost like a birth again for us and a new life waiting.

Spaz, life [U]does[/U] get better again. We really come to laugh and enjoy participating again. It is just around the corner for you. Keep on keepin' on...


katlin09 09-17-2011 05:21 PM

Re: Time to quit pain meds but how to deal with pain without
I'll always be here to support you...I read your thread everyday and interject when it's needed. I know sometimes it can be difficult to sift through dozens of posts when your not feeling your best.

Please believe me when I say, you are doing very well,your being smart, safe, and achieving the goals you set one at a time, thats the best way to do this, when your doing it alone.

If you ever need to talk, just give me a yell.


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