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Advice about estate planning

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Old 12-09-2008, 05:24 AM   #1
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 1
dlw65 HB User
Advice about estate planning

I have read this board for a while now, but I have just registered hoping you could give me some advice. I am trying to help my father with his will. My mother has vascular dementia and Alzheimers. My father wants to divide everything between my sister and me and not leave anything in my mothers name since she is not competent. My mother still lives at home. The land and home are in my fathers name - my mothers name is not on the deed. There is only one bank account that doesn't have much money in it that has her name on it. Is it legal for my father not to leave anything to my mother? He is afraid that if my mother ever goes in a nursing home they would take all the money and try to get the land. Any advice? Thanks in advance for your help.

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Old 12-09-2008, 05:29 AM   #2
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: dallas, texas
Posts: 64
css1 HB User
Re: Advice about estate planning

that all sounds reasonable, and imho, u definitely need too see a lawyer for the x's and o's, cause is sounds like u all know what u want

the problem is if something happened to your dad in the interim, by law mom is sole heir, and then u just have to do more stuff, ie, legal wise to get to the same place u need to be, and know u you should be

hoped that helped
good luck

Old 12-09-2008, 06:44 AM   #3
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: NJ, United States
Posts: 1,471
caringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB Usercaringsister54 HB User
Re: Advice about estate planning

In most states even when the spouse leaves things to children, the children don't get it if the other spouse is still alive, no matter what their condition.

This happened to us when my Dad died. By law, even though in his will it stated 1/2 of his estate to go to mother and the other 1/2 to split between my sister and I, we got nothing. Everything went to Mom. By the way, this was fine with both of us.

Your father can give you and your siblings the house and land now, continue living there but it be in your names. in some states there's a look back period and that here in NJ is 5 years. if your father lives longer than 5 years, you are all fine.

Get as much in your names now. Have a lawyer help you. It can even be put in a trust in your names, etc.

Old 12-09-2008, 06:11 PM   #4
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Boston, MA. USA
Posts: 534
polina HB Userpolina HB User
Re: Advice about estate planning

We just did all this with my father's estate this summer. We went to a elder
estate planning attorney. We have the house in a irrevocable trust. There is a look back period of 5years in the state of Massachusetts. In my mother's case she has alz/dementia it is to late but it will probably be fine for my dad. The house is in all three of us names. My dad my mom and myself. If my mom goes into a nursing home tomorrow my dad gets to stay in the house but they will look back 5years. It is all so complicated and you have to have a really good lawyer who will spend the time with you and go over everything. The whole cost of everything with the lawyer was five thousand dollars. Good luck. I have all the paper work and a big binder that the whole estate is in. I have to take the time one day soon and read through it all.

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