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all4mom 05-15-2012 02:25 PM

calming med?
I hope by digging around here I can find some more info if no one replies to my question, as I'm hoping to hit upon a medication that will help my Mom "calm down" somewhat. Fidgit: yes, I know what you mean! My mother suffers from terrible agitation, fearfulness, delusions and also get testy and combative with caregivers... Now that she's in a rehab (after being "delirious" in the hospital for two months) and they're ready to kick her out because of her behaviors and moods, I can see the stark difference between her and the long-term Alzheimer's patients; Mom is NOT AD...

TheNiece 07-16-2012 09:18 PM

Re: FrontoTemporal Lobe Dementia? Anyone?
My mom is the local go-to person to take care of my 67 y.o. aunt who we think has FTD.

Aunt was diagnosed BiPolar about 15 years ago - she went into an almost catatonic depression, and there have been times she has been crazy-higher than a kite. In the past 30 years she seems to have had somewhat of a narcissistic personality disorder - not sure if diagnosed, but pretty textbook symptoms, very selfish and self-centered, she was not always this way however. It got worse as she got older. Super-poor decision making. Hypersexual behavior. Very foul-mouthed (again, this was a later in life occurance). She also went from being a very stylish, put together person, with a home out of House Beautiful, to a house out of Hoarders, unkempt, physically disheveled, etc.

A little over a year ago, she had another major "episode". Prior to that she was still communicating with my mom coherently. Once she had the episode, she was put in a psychiatric hospital where we strongly believe she was abused. She went from relatively normal/lucid to basketcase in about 2 weeks. After the psych hospital, she was placed in a nice Alzheimer's unit, she paces 8-9 hours a day, is physically strong, speaks gibberish, remembers a few people, is able to do the simple "crafty" stuff (she was very artistic, painted BEAUTIFUL watercolor paintings and has always had an eye for design). In the past couple of weeks, she became very aggressive and combative. So much so that she was taken to the hospital. The hospital wouldn't keep her and sent her back to the psychiatric hospital that we don't like. The assisted living/Alzheimers unit, say they can't take her back given her current condition. The psychiatric hospiital says she can't stay there long term. The doctors that have looked at her the past six months don't really feel anymore that she was ever bipolar even though she exhibited manic behavior -- they think she has had FTD and she is in an advanced stage of it now. She is almost out of personal funds and will need to be in some kind of medicaid unit in the near future - but who will take her? She will have to be in a secure unit because she is a wanderer. She has boundless energy. She can hurt herself and hurt other people. She was moving big pieces of furniture at the Assisted living.

My poor mom is stressed out. She's 72. I feel bad for my aunt, but I don't know if she even knows what's going on. Her son is trying to do his best, but he lives a thousand miles away with a young family so the brunt of the responsibility falls on my mom to run around to doctors and try to figure things out (they live in Arizona). Where do they house people like this other than the state mental hospital?

Thanks for reading.

all4mom 07-17-2012 11:33 AM

Re: FrontoTemporal Lobe Dementia? Anyone?
I hear that! My mom, too, was being kicked out of here and kicked out of there; no one seems to know how or is able to deal with unruly behavior and everyone just passes the buck. Are people like this, with a dementia or head injury resulting in certain behaviors, being essentially discriminated against when they aren't afforded the same rights to good and humane care as other people with diseases and injuries? Interesting question.

I just thank God that I *am* able to care for Mom myself now; I got her out of the so-called "rehab" (where she'd otherwise be housed on the wing with violent crazies and doped into a stupor, if not outright abused, which she ALSO was in one facility, I'm sure) and back home where I can tolerate her behavior and, again thank God, have found a couple of good caregiver (CNAs) who understand dementia and don't take her yelling, insults, and even combative behavior personally. It's not at all easy, but we're doing it.

JMHO, but it's her son's responsibility to care for his mom. So he lives far away? Then he needs to either move closer to her or bring her closer to him and oversee her care. I find it inexcusable that he's burdening an old lady (your mother at 77 and probably health problems of her own) with the oversight of your aunt. I'm not sure what else to suggest; it sounds like she has a very typical case, but one long misdiagnosed! Sad...

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