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  • Anxiety and so much more

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    Old 08-09-2017, 01:55 PM   #1
    Join Date: Aug 2017
    Location: Philadelphia
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    tds971 HB User
    Anxiety and so much more

    Hello, I am not even sure what I am hoping to accomplish by posting here but I have dealt with anxiety the majority of my life. I am hoping at some point I can get the courage to get decent help or gain some tools to get some relief. I need some non judgmental advice and reassurance. I need something.

    There are several things that trigger my anxiety but after my father had a heart attack and passed away I was able to push my anxieties away for a couple years but after about 6 years (it has been about 10 years now) I could barely function when my mother or my (now) husband doesn't answer their phone. My father had a heart attack in front of me and I had no clue what to do to help him at the time. As I look back i know that if I were to administer CPR he would be here today. I feel that I have some sort of PTSD from these events and any time I feel that someone I care about may be in danger I panic.

    Even after these events I didnt have a problem with changes in my life, such as changing jobs or things of this nature. Now when there is a change like this I cant hold my emotions. I feel that basically life is over, I cant stop thinking about how temporary life is and is this even worth it because it may just end soon or at least eventually. I get so emotional I just cry and cant stop my mind from thinking about all the negative things about life.

    I am also petrified to become a parent. I have no worries about childbirth at all. Its the change involved with parenting. I am so in love with my husband i never want that to end (another worry I have) I am ashamed to say that I was pregnant and had to terminate due to anxiety (Only my mother knows this). I felt like I couldn't function, i couldn't eat, sleep or even think clearly. I would have panic attacks through out the day and could barely breathe. I went to see a therapist during this time and only felt judged more. I am so ashamed of myself.

    My husband wants children and I only want him to be happy I am trying so hard to get better at handling my anxiety and worries but it just keeps coming back. I make mistakes reading about child rearing and only see bad stories. I know at this point its all I notice because that is my worry but it puts me in a bad place again.

    On the flip side of this I have so many happy moments in my life also, I get so excited thinking about a future with my husband and traveling and I try to imagine having children and just enjoying life. Then I see an article about how something basically ruined their life to have kids and then I am back to where I think I am doomed because I cant handle the change. Every time I state some of these fears to people I just get the " stop worrying" "just push it away" "everything will be fine"

    I need to hear about people who were able to overcome this horrible thing called anxiety.

    Last edited by Administrator; 08-12-2017 at 11:44 PM.

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    Old 08-10-2017, 06:10 AM   #2
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    MSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB User
    Re: Anxiety and so much more

    The only way to deal with this much anxiety is to get some help. You cannot fix this by yourself. There is no shame in getting help.

    Anxiety can be handled in several different ways, from one on one counseling to group, from medication to other cognitive and behavioral therapies. You will need to speak with someone who can offer you an opinion on where to start.

    Lots of people suffer from anxiety. The only thing to be ashamed of is not asking for help so that you can continue on with what appears to be a very healthy, positive life!

    Talk to your gyn or your family doctor. Ask for referrals. You can also check out your local hospital and look for therapists or psychologists who list anxiety on their list of diseases they treat. Unfortunately, there is no easy cure for what you are asking, but there really is plenty of help available if you take the first step and make that call.

    Good luck!
    RRMS- dx 05

    Old 08-10-2017, 03:31 PM   #3
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    Re: Anxiety and so much more

    You need help tds971, from those in the Mental Health Profession. A Psychiatrist who can prescribe medications that would calm your thoughts and a Psycho Therapist who can help you learn to change your thought process through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) or another type.

    Your fear, worry and anxiety is coming from your thoughts/feelings that are negative. It's time to try replacing negative thoughts and feelings with positive ones. The next time you have a negative thought or feeling stop that thought and see if you can replace it with something positive.

    We have the ability to change our lives by learning how to change the way we think and feel. There are many things in this life we cannot control but we definitely can control our actions and reactions.

    As far as having some sort of PTSD --- you don't --- and that is a positive :-)

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