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  • Please help! Unsure what this is

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    Old 04-05-2018, 11:41 AM   #1
    Join Date: Apr 2018
    Posts: 1
    Shonyas HB User
    Please help! Unsure what this is

    I'm really struggling with anxiety And certain symptoms I get which I am trying to work out what they are.
    I think i have always had anxiety. If it was a certain worrisome or nervous issue I would get the stomach churning feeling and trembling but I just never knew it was called anxiety! Since having my daughter 3 years ago things seem to have gone worse. Basically, I had stress and anxiety during pregnancy as I had miscarried a baby prior to getting pregnant with my daughter, so I worried quite a lot of the time with her. Towards the end I had strange symptoms where I would get tingling in my face and pressure headaches. I had high blood pressure due to stress and then got white coat syndrome. She was born with a condition where her ear didn't form so I worried relentlessly about that and conditions associated. She is a healthy, happy 3 year old and you wouldn't think she has any hearing issues! Around 6 months after her birth I got bad heartburn that wouldn't go. It would feel like my food was fermenting at night and I would get breathless and feel acidic all over my body. I am a terrible google searcher and I worked out I may have silent relflux, which I think I have had for over 20 years. So I panicked then about cancer etc. I've had scans, endoscopy and bloods and all is fine. The heartburn eventually settled but I do still get it now and again and am always congested through silent reflux. I don't like taking meds I should add.
    Anyway, I am a single mum to my daughter. She is a very challenging strong willed child so that comes with stress as well as juggling a home, finances etc. I do feel massively overwhelmed at times. She constantly wants my attention and I get very irritated. She sees her dad weekly so I do get a little me time but I am really struggling with health anxiety at the moment. I still have problems with foods I eat and how they affect me. I'm so sensitive and I eat vegan now but sometimes I could feel that bubbling of gasses and get the feeling of congestion and breathlessness, which is when I know it's silent reflux. I get constant aches and pains in my body. I have a pain I get under my left rib that goes into my back. Again I've googled all sorts on this! Nothing cane back untoward on my tests. I've concluded it could just be gas build up! I wake every morning feeling rubbish. I don't sleep great as my girl sleeps with me. Trying to get her to sleep in her own bed! I'm always so tired. I've been getting headaches lately which feel sinussy but I got anxiety it could be something sinister.

    I had a massage and the masseur mentioned a mole so I had terrible anxiety over that and when I saw the gp she referred me to counselling. So I will be getting counselling for the anxiety but can anyone help with symptoms please as that really panics me. It's usually worse at night. I get a feeling like I can't breath properly, tingly, stinging feeling in my face, heart feels like it's pumping in my stomach, pumping sound in my ears and I get really cold and tremble. I had bloods as I thought maybe thyroid but it's all ok! Can these also be anxiety symptoms? Can you get them when you don't feel particularly anxious? Is my body so highly sensitive to things from being in the flight or fight response for so long? I don't feel depressed as such but I also feel tearful quite a lot. Can that also be a sign? Hope someone can shed some light as I don't have anyone to talk to about this.
    Thank you

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    Old 04-06-2018, 01:07 PM   #2
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    yayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB Useryayagirl HB User
    Re: Please help! Unsure what this is

    Dear Shonyas,

    The biggest issue you seem to have is anxiety. And anxiety can discolor and ruin every aspect of your life including your physical health. Everything you wrote points to anxiety.

    When anxiety clouds everything it can be very difficult or even impossible to see clearly enough to deal with anything else, such as raising a child, work, health, recreation, eating, sleeping and so on. I know by experience because I suffered severe anxiety, too, and was also physically disabled as a single parent of two little ones, and anxiety affected everything in my life.

    One doctor offered me a drug but after taking it twice I hated the foggy mindedness it caused and have never taken any of the drugs again. The doctor said I would get used to it, but I am not one to depend on drugs and I hate the feeling. My problem was not that I thought, it was what I dwelled upon. Fears.

    Nothing changed for me until I happened to find a small church of elderly folks that loved young people. They couldn't fix me or my life, but they did teach me some life skills about saying no to bad influences and choices and then I began seeking and learning of healthy resources; groups, books, etc. Not all groups or churches are equal, so don't feel you have to stay anywhere you are uncomfortable. This is something only we can fix within ourselves, so don't look for other people to fix your problems. Just listen and learn. See that you are normal for what you have gone through and that you can change direction and make other choices.

    There are free women's groups and counseling in a lot of American cities and towns. Even if you can't find live groups you can find online groups where you can share and hear that you are far from alone and where you can learn of more free resources, books, and so on.

    Help is out there but you need to accept that you cannot fix this alone and start opening up to live people. Make sure they are safe people. Safe people meet in groups in the open, do not try to change you or fix you, and provide safe resources for females. A really safe resource is organizations for abused females. Whether or not you were abused, for some reason you didn't get life skills from your family of origin, making you vulnerable to even your own child, not knowing how to handle in one of those groups you might not relate to what everyone else experienced but you can begin to see how your own thoughts have been tripping you up, and then begin to change your way of thinking. That's what your child needs modeled to it. And, you can begin to take healthy steps to change your life.

    ~ YaYa ~

    Last edited by yayagirl; 04-06-2018 at 01:14 PM.

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