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  • Does anyone else have this issue?



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    Old 02-16-2019, 12:15 AM   #1
    JLS08
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    Does anyone else have this issue?

    I've noticed that I have a problem where I know I shouldn't look up info on a subject but I feel a compulsion to do so. For instance I will hear something about a shooting and then feel this urge to read up about other mass shootings. (This is just an example. It happens with many different subjects). I have tried telling myself I won't look because I know I will feel bad, but something in my pushes me to do it or I have a nagging voice in my head until I do. Lately this has been keeping me up all night. I plan to see the doctor soon and am hoping treatment will help with this, but I'm wondering if anyone else has or has had this issue. I'm not sure why I do it. I'm sure part of it is in hopes of making me feel better, but often times I end up reading things that make me feel worse. If anyone has any tips for how to get past this too I would love to hear them.

     
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    Old 02-16-2019, 02:24 AM   #2
    MSNik
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    Re: Does anyone else have this issue?

    I am sure that other people with anxiety disorders have felt the same way you do, but there is no answer on how to tell you to deal with this except to tell you what has been said over and over.....you really need to make that appointment and start some therapy and/ or medication to help you cope.

    You appear to have some severe anxiety and unfortunately, no one can really tell you what to do about it because we are not professionals. You have choices on what to look up and what to think about, you need to realize that. Redirect your thoughts to something more pleasant is the first step in not thinking about scary thoughts...easier said than done I am sure.

    You stated that you are planning to see a doctor soon. Do you have an appointment made?
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    Old 02-16-2019, 06:46 AM   #3
    yayagirl
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    Re: Does anyone else have this issue?

    Dear JL,

    To me it seems just human nature to do whatever I tell myself I should not do. To me the idea here is to tell ourselves what we should do. Not dwell on the 'should nots'. We can't change that there are sad and bad things in this world. The idea here is to create a balance in our own minds of what we choose to dwell on. It is a choice.

    I think the mind tends to choose to do whatever we choose to dwell on. If I tell myself I should not have sugar, what am I dwelling on? Sugar. Then I want it. It becomes all I think about. I buy it. I eat too much of it. It makes me feel sick. I tell myself I am not going to eat it. Then I see it and buy it and eat it.

    To change that I have to tell myself I want healthy food, think about getting healthy from eating healthy food, and then I will buy it and eat it.

    In the same way we always choose whatever we allow our minds to dwell on.

    My tip to you is to gain understanding of your self and where you are coming from. Did some sad or bad things happen to you or someone else?

    I used to have so many of what I call intrusive thoughts, just really awful thoughts that seemed to jump into my mind. In therapy with a fantastic doctor I was able to face a series of traumatic events that did happen in my youth; things that happened to both me and to other people that I knew or grew up with. A great therapist helped me realize those things did happen, they do happen, and they can seem random, and they can be overwhelming. But those things, esp when they happened in the past, are over with. There are a lot of beautiful things in the world that are worthy of dwelling on.

    It was not the subjects so much that had caused me a problem, it was what I told myself about them. For me, telling myself anything about a subject seemed like an invitation to keep dwelling on that subject more and more and more. My therapist taught me that it is fine to face reality, but is important to choose a limit on how much time I give to any given subject. If I am an ambulance driver or a paramedic, I need to pay attention to certain things I see. But guess what. I am not working in those fields. And ambulance drivers and paramedics need to take vacations and go look at the ocean and the flowers.

    My therapist told the truth. The truth is that bad and wrong things do happen. The truth is we each have choices to make, and only you can choose what to dwell on for your own self.

    The same way you choose any subject, you can also choose to read inspirational stories. There is no end of accidents, crime, wrong actions and bad behavior going on in this world. There is also no end of flowers, good deeds, blue skies and happy outcomes to look at and dwell on.

    Rather than to think about what you shouldn't dwell on, you can make a decision to think of happy and good things to dwell on. Do a search for inspirational stories. There are even great inspirational magazines you can subscribe to.
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