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  • Health Anxiety is a B

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    Old 06-14-2020, 06:27 PM   #1
    lostgirl17's Avatar
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    lostgirl17 HB User
    Health Anxiety is a B

    My anxiety has plagued me since I was a child but as an adult and, in the age of google and *****, my health anxiety has taken me to a level I never considered possible. 2020 began with the miscarriage of a child that left me reeling in ways I had never experienced. The sadness and total despair were so heavy. My husbandís decision to immediately sign up for a vasectomy put me into a deeper depression and a place of anger. I was furious with him, blaming myself for the loss of my baby, so alone in all of those emotions. Then there came Corona. My son was hospitalized last fall for a virus that landed us in the ICU for a week. His breathing issues were already a top concern and the thought of him contracting this virus put me in a complete panic. Then it happened. I woke up and couldnít walk a straight line to the kitchen. The teledoc appointment ended with a diagnosis of Vertigo. I was prescribed Valium and that was that. But it wasnít really. Then came some headaches and I felt like my vision was off. I googled every symptom. And if course now I have a brain tumor... but is it just anxiety? The fullness in my ear? The ENT sent me to Vestibular rehab center. Itís not an infection. Now my neck is killing me. So Iím at the chiropractor who tells me Iím so tense he knows I have to be in pain and suggests TMJ. But that old brain tumor is still nagging at me... my dizziness improved but still rears itís ugly head when I bend over or look straight up. My headaches are less but is it because Iím medicating myself and itís masking the truth. I hate that this is taking over my life except I donít think anyone realizes the true struggles Iím constantly dealing with. Am I just crazy? Am I dying? How can I move past this? I have been blessed beyond measure in my life but the anxiety and depression are blinding me and I feel powerless against it all. So back to the chiro and a new pc this week. Thanks for letting me vent my story... I know Iím not alone in this but it sure feels pretty lonely.

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    Old 06-15-2020, 06:12 AM   #2
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    Re: Health Anxiety is a B

    Hi Lostgirl, you are not crazy and you are not dying.

    Lost of people are going through anxiety in different forms right now. The world is upside down and its normal to be afraid. Some of us handle it better than others, but I think its safe to say that everyone has thoughts about "what is going on" right now.

    They talk about a new normal, and its a terrible thing to call it because nothing is normal right now...BUT, it is not going to be like this forever.

    Your issues are more psychological than medical. Stop looking for answers with medical doctors and consider asking your primary doctor for a referral for someone to talk to about your fears. OR you can call your insurance company and ask them for referrals which will be covered under your insurance. Either way, having someone to talk to and dump this off your chest, will be helpful. Right now, doing it virtually will be helpful as you will not have to add to your anxiety by traveling to an office!

    Remember, you are not alone and you are NOT crazy! Ask for some professional help- as now is the time to learn new ways to handle this! Good luck!
    RRMS- dx 05

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