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    Old 12-14-2012, 07:04 AM   #1
    jfrombk
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    anexity causing bad thoughts in a relationship

    Hello all. Its been a while since i ve posted. First off ,too whom ever reads this i just want to say thank you for taking time out to do so. So long story short, i am married now!! yay! I ve been married for about 1 month now. My wife and I have been together for 3 years. she honestly is the love of my life and keeper of my heart. I feel that shes also the most beaituful thing i ve layed eyes on. During the first month of our relationship, i had a panic attack which then caused me to start having weird thoughts. About 95% of the thoughts were about me doing something wrong. Really weird thoughts. Like i would go some where, and then 2 weeks later i would have a thought like, did i do this? or that? pretanting to something bad. Stuff that i would never do. So for that i had seen a doctor and a phyc, and a threapst So fast forward i am on two meds now. lexapro and wellburtion. i got on those at different times about 2 and a half years ago. So fast forward again.. we got married a month ago. That day honestly was the best day of my life. I ve never felt that much joy in one day before. The next two weeks were magical. We moved in together, finally having freedom to out of our parents house.. When i tell you i was happy, i cannot express that enought. lol. So the last week and a half have been weird. A few days i had started to get bad thoughts about myself again, but they didnt take over my mind as they usually do. THen they started to be about her. Now thoughts about her come and go. I feel so bad when i have them. Its so annoying. I know shes the one for me. its the whole nature of the relationship, not just one thing. And its werid because when things are good in my mind and normal, i am soo happy. even when we have problems i can think striaght and i am so happy about us.

    so back to this past week. The thoughts have started to come and be like. O..you dont love her. or o your not attracted to her. . and it just makes me so sad to think that way. it makes me feel like nothing matters. Like marriage means nothing to me when in fact i am a strong christian and i take that so seriously . I just feel awful thinking these things. It also doesnt help that i had missed 4 meds straight last week. lol. but Yea, i feel bad.. i just wanted to know has this ever happened to any one? sorry for the long post.

     
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    Old 12-14-2012, 07:52 AM   #2
    writeleft
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    Re: anexity causing bad thoughts in a relationship

    Hello there,

    I am so happy to hear of your marriage to the love of your life. There is nothing better than that.

    It sounds like the bad thoughts are connected to the fact that you missed your meds four times. I would not spend another minute down on yourself, I would instead get right back on those meds and know that skipping leads to the bad thoughts returning.

    We are lucky to have such effective medications, and I know it is hard to take them everyday, but everyday is worth a lifetime.

    My best to you and your wife.

     
    Old 12-14-2012, 08:03 AM   #3
    jfrombk
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    Re: anexity causing bad thoughts in a relationship

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by writeleft View Post
    Hello there,

    I am so happy to hear of your marriage to the love of your life. There is nothing better than that.

    It sounds like the bad thoughts are connected to the fact that you missed your meds four times. I would not spend another minute down on yourself, I would instead get right back on those meds and know that skipping leads to the bad thoughts returning.

    We are lucky to have such effective medications, and I know it is hard to take them everyday, but everyday is worth a lifetime.

    My best to you and your wife.

    Thank you very much for your reply. Yea its so crazy how your mind can change from one extreme to another. Its crazy because when things are good and i am happy i am at my happiest point . Its also amazing how much influence the drugs have on us too.

     
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