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View Full Version : Is this common with OCD?


justwanttobeme
03-27-2015, 12:20 PM
Lately I've been focused on things that like if they aren't "innate" then they can change, and really panicked that my personality wasn't innate and it would change and then I had the thought cross my mind that what if my love for my family wasn't innate (because I kind of thought it was, which in a way it is) but I told my mom about it and understandably she got upset and was saying that maybe I didn't and that I can't make myself feel what I don't and I got upset because I know there are like "intrusive" feelings, like with HOCD and groinal responses, and I said out of anger in my mind "maybe I don't" and I took it back because I don't want it to be true obviously, but it felt like I meant it and I wasn't upset for long, but now it's like I feel disconnected from her and I'm very upset because it's not like I'm "numb" it's just I get a very "depressed" feeling when I'm with her and don't feel what I want to feel. She keeps saying that the more I question it the more I push myself away, which I know is true, but I can't help but to worry that I actually don't. =( I wake up in a panic feeling like "oh my god, I don't!" but I know deep down I do and if I calm down long enough I can feel glimpses of it... but is this common?

HappyVegan
03-29-2015, 09:22 PM
@justwanttobeme, I completely understand what you're feeling/thinking. I do this too. OCD is hard. I think you're being too hard on yourself. You're fine just the way you are. Maybe what your thinking is the truth. And it's o.k. to be honest. You're not "bad". You are your own person. You sound like a very intelligent person. You have the right to think/feel what you want. If you didn't care about your family, you never would've posted what you did.