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View Full Version : No one ever said it would be this hard


Heysay
10-24-2015, 10:27 PM
ive been with him for 3 years and he relapsed in May after his best friend overdosed. I wanted to help him but nothing I do changes anything. He steals I can't seem to hide anything he will find it. I'm going broke and he just got my car impounded. I'm taking the bus to work and school and I'm in my last two weeks of college. Why now?!?! Why do I do this to myself. I should have learned when my ex put me in a hospital for being strung out on meth and beating me, why would I fall for another addict after all that? And why do I love my boyfriend so much still and want to make this work? It's not working. He's not trying to get better and I can't change it. I've separated who he was from who he is now and I can't let go.

sweetpotato13
10-25-2015, 08:09 AM
I am so sorry for your pain. I understand your deep love, and I also understand that you are absolutely powerless over your boyfriend's addiction. So is he. I think that sometimes we keep repeating the same mistakes and are attracted to the same type of person due to reasons only our heart knows. Maybe we had parents who were addicts. Maybe we feel we can love someone through their addiction. I don't have the answers for you. I do know that if you were my own daughter, I would tell you RUN.
I would tell you, love is not enough when your loved one is an addict. I will tell you to move forward, and also to get some therapy to determine why you want to be with these men.
Please take care of yourself. You deserve more, even if you don't know that yet.

Jeff5213
12-06-2015, 10:24 PM
ive been with him for 3 years and he relapsed in May after his best friend overdosed. I wanted to help him but nothing I do changes anything. He steals I can't seem to hide anything he will find it. I'm going broke and he just got my car impounded. I'm taking the bus to work and school and I'm in my last two weeks of college. Why now?!?! Why do I do this to myself. I should have learned when my ex put me in a hospital for being strung out on meth and beating me, why would I fall for another addict after all that? And why do I love my boyfriend so much still and want to make this work? It's not working. He's not trying to get better and I can't change it. I've separated who he was from who he is now and I can't let go.

I know it's hard but if you really loved him, you've got to help him overcome his bad habit. You should conduct intervention or ask his family member to do so. This will help him realize the problem. You can also consider entering AA/NA Meeting so that you can get some advice from individuals who are also experiencing the same problem as you. Good luck with you and your boyfriend. Yes, i know it's hard. But remember, there is always hope! You both will get through this.