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Children1100
07-14-2016, 08:55 PM
I've been with my husband for 22 years. He is an alcoholic and I can't deal with it anymore. A couple months ago he got fired from a job because he had alcohol in his system.

I have tried so many different things to help him realize that he has a problem but he blames me and calls me fat (only when he's drinking). He is so hurtful and that started a couple years ago.

How do you all deal with it? I am really so stressed from his drinking and his hurtful words.

Thank you,

Bernice

vegasac
08-06-2016, 04:50 PM
As a recovering alcoholic, I am sorry to report, there is nothing you can do to stop him. People often assume "when they hit rock bottom" or even worse "if they loved me enough" I studied the disease in great length and it's a very complicated situation, whereby the alcohol takes over your primal survival needs, I know it sounds strange but he has a disease and only he can choose to get help. I know you don't want to hear this but you have to consider yourself, I know you love him and it's hard but sometimes you have to consider yourself. It won't go away on it's own and it will only get worse until he's reached a point where recovery is the only option, in the middle of this, you I am sorry to say are enabling him by staying with him and need to decide, do you want to continue in to live this life or try to gain some semblance of normal again? It's a bad situation, I know but he needs to make the decision and there is nothing you can do that will change that. I wish you the best.

Seraph
08-06-2016, 07:29 PM
Look after yourself; as the previous post says, you can do nothing for his problem. Go to Alanon meetings. They will give you help, advice, support and coping skills. Sera