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Inpain1985
05-28-2017, 09:52 AM
My mother was a huge hypocondriac, who wouldent see a doctor.
She asked me if i thought if there where several things wrong with her every day.
I coulden't stand it any longer and said no, to get peace from the constant talking about it.
I just said no, sometimes yes maybe there is.
When i Said yes, it resulted in a storm do you think this and do you think that. Do you think i should see a doctor, do you think i am dying.
I stopped listening a long time ago.
I Said no, like most other times.
She asked me if i Would go with her to the doctor. I Said just relax it's just your anxiety.
I had visited the doctors Office with her once before, where nothing was wrong with her. She was convinced she was dying Then, so why Would this be any different? But most times she Would not go to the Doctor. She seemed more afraid than usual, but Then again, hyprocondiacs are always afraid. All weekend she Said i really think i am dying, like she Said a thousands time before. I Said she annoyed me and hung up the phone. The next Morning she was dead. I diddent listen to my bad feeling, because i had bad feelings before, from the constant stress thinking about if she really could be seriously ill or dying. Now i feel huge guilt. It is unbearable. I feel like i killed her, by not taking her seriously. I feel like dying inside and like it's all my fault. I was always afraid she Would die. Every Day all my life i worried. I couldent tell my bad feeling apart from the constant fear of loosing her. It is so painfull beyond belief. I Can't stand it.

Snoopy61
05-28-2017, 10:37 AM
My deepest sympathies Inpain1985.

Your Mother's death is not your fault, keep telling yourself that ---- it's true.

Your Mother needed to take responsibility for her health and seeing a Dr. would have been the first step. Had she seen a Dr. she might still be alive.

You might benefit from grief counseling, please consider it.