View Full Version : Preparing for the death of a loved one

12-03-2018, 04:29 PM
How do you cope with this? I need support, advice etc. I am struggling to come to terms with it all so suddenly

12-04-2018, 05:02 AM
Hi Sammy. I am sorry you are going through this....this is a difficult time and I have been in your shoes.

Is your loved one on hospice? Usually end stage diseases are placed on hospice benefits. The reason I ask is that all hospices have support for the loved ones of the patient...they have both chaplains and social workers who can talk to you and help you get through this terrible time.

If this does not apply, do you have a church or some sort of religious entity you can reach out to? What about a support group at your local hospital? They do exist and they are not just for "aftewards" they can help you now as well.

Everyone grieves differently and there is no right or wrong- but the only thing you can do right now is spend as much time as possible with the loved one and put some happy memories out in front...maybe this means remembering and talking about good times- or maybe it means creating a few new ones- Maybe it simply means talking to them and letting them know they are loved.

I have been going through this for months now with my stepfather who is dying of end stage Parkinsons. He is now at a point with his dementia that he has no idea who I am and very rarely speaks- but it gives me strength just to sit with him in the nursing home and play music he likes and hold his hand. His day is also coming soon and I will be devastated, but at this time I am trying my best to be strong for my mom and the rest of my family.

Look into grief support...ask his doctor, ask your local hospital and if he or she is on hospice, ask them.

Hugs to you.

12-04-2018, 07:06 AM
Dear sammy,

I'm so sorry that you are facing the loss of a loved one. :(
Please ask the doctors or a nurse to explain what is going on so you won't have surprises. These things are always hard on us.

Really you must get someone to talk with, to explain how you feel and explain what is happening. This is a very difficult thing to face.