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ladybug8372
11-09-2003, 08:46 PM
My sister was a crack cocaine addict for a good 10 years, badly. After several rehab centers failed, she became pregnant, and just simply stopped and has been "clean" for 3 years! wonderful, right?? well, i am not totally convinced that she has remained clean. shortly after giving birth, she and her husband moved away, so I dont know if I am suspicious for good reason, or just simply dont trust her. She is very moody, (she caused major problems to where we didnt speak for a year). She doesnt sleep well, she is depressed. She hasnt lost any major weight since I last saw her a year ago---but she displays symptoms that are questionable. My question basically is---how long do cocaine addicts effects stay with you?? Will she always be moody, will she always be depressed?? Will she always have health problems?? Or is all of this occuring because she is using again? She wakes in the middle of the night with what she calls "panic attacks" but I really dont think thats what she is having, as I have those myself. I think what she is having paranoia. She said that when she wakes, she is so fearful that she goes around checking all doors, windows, etc and to check the house to make sure no one has entered her home. She has been seeing doctors, and had been diagnosed with being bi-polar, depressed, etc. (but am not sure if they are correct, or if she is fooling them, by telling them she is off of drugs, and if they are just taking her word for it and just going with the next closest diagnosis to her symptoms) I really question if she sees drs only to get pain, sleeping medicines. She did admit to me last year that she still smokes pot once a month--so I know that total drug use hasnt stopped--but i am mainly concerned about the cocaine and unsure of its long-term effects, and if her signs are symptoms of drug use again, or if this is a long term effect of her prior usage.

Bacne
11-10-2003, 08:55 PM
My sister was a crack cocaine addict for a good 10 years, badly. After several rehab centers failed, she became pregnant, and just simply stopped and has been "clean" for 3 years! wonderful, right?? well, i am not totally convinced that she has remained clean. shortly after giving birth, she and her husband moved away, so I dont know if I am suspicious for good reason, or just simply dont trust her. She is very moody, (she caused major problems to where we didnt speak for a year). She doesnt sleep well, she is depressed. She hasnt lost any major weight since I last saw her a year ago---but she displays symptoms that are questionable. My question basically is---how long do cocaine addicts effects stay with you?? Will she always be moody, will she always be depressed?? Will she always have health problems?? Or is all of this occuring because she is using again? She wakes in the middle of the night with what she calls "panic attacks" but I really dont think thats what she is having, as I have those myself. I think what she is having paranoia. She said that when she wakes, she is so fearful that she goes around checking all doors, windows, etc and to check the house to make sure no one has entered her home. She has been seeing doctors, and had been diagnosed with being bi-polar, depressed, etc. (but am not sure if they are correct, or if she is fooling them, by telling them she is off of drugs, and if they are just taking her word for it and just going with the next closest diagnosis to her symptoms) I really question if she sees drs only to get pain, sleeping medicines. She did admit to me last year that she still smokes pot once a month--so I know that total drug use hasnt stopped--but i am mainly concerned about the cocaine and unsure of its long-term effects, and if her signs are symptoms of drug use again, or if this is a long term effect of her prior usage.

This is just my opinion and observations as an addict and friends of lots of addicts. Addiction is a problem period. Its more about being an addict than being addicted to a specific drug. If she used crack for 10yrs, and now says shes smoking pot once a month; I would doubt it. Most addicts will substitute an addiction with another and will eventually use it just as frequently. I would say that if your having doubts whether she is using or not there is probably a good reason why. You know your sister, so go with what your gut tells you. If your wrong, at least you went with what you believed.

Also, I believe that people who use drugs and are generally depressed need to find the root of the depression before they get off the drugs, otherwise, they won't have as much will to see the future and also they will be more tempted to go back to the drugs. Good luck and tell her you love her and try not to be abrasive or you will just close all communication. Thats guaranteed.

ladybug8372
11-11-2003, 05:46 AM
This is just my opinion and observations as an addict and friends of lots of addicts. Addiction is a problem period. Its more about being an addict than being addicted to a specific drug. If she used crack for 10yrs, and now says shes smoking pot once a month; I would doubt it. Most addicts will substitute an addiction with another and will eventually use it just as frequently. I would say that if your having doubts whether she is using or not there is probably a good reason why. You know your sister, so go with what your gut tells you. If your wrong, at least you went with what you believed.

Also, I believe that people who use drugs and are generally depressed need to find the root of the depression before they get off the drugs, otherwise, they won't have as much will to see the future and also they will be more tempted to go back to the drugs. Good luck and tell her you love her and try not to be abrasive or you will just close all communication. Thats guaranteed.




Thanks for your reply. There are several of us in the family that believe she is still using--if not crack, then something else. But my parents wont hear of it--but then again, they didnt want to believe it when I first told them years ago, but they later found out for themselves. My sister and I had a major fight last year at Thanksgiving, where she told lies on me and my husband, tried to destroy my relationship with my parents, and she also became violent. That is why we didnt speak for almost a year. She came home for a visit a few days ago, and my parents have given me grief over the last year for not contacting her, and then they really gave me grief when she came home. So, to keep problems down, I went and visited her--not really caring to. We did have some words, but because my father is sick, and because he got some bad news about my aunt that night, I decided to put my feelings aside, so that I wouldnt have it on my concious should dad get worse due to stress, I didnt want to be part of that cause. But I really still dont care to interact with her. And I did tell her that if she gets out of hand (fussing, etc) just one time, that would be it---and I told mom and dad to not expect me to interact with her the next time. Her moodiness drives me crazy. I know that with depression, you can be very moody, so wasnt sure if it was just depression, or if it was drug usage. My gut feeling is drug usuage, and like you stated, until she finds out why she is depressed, it will do no good to come off drugs, as she would feel down and depressed, and go back to them.

LaynesADDICTI0N
11-11-2003, 05:32 PM
well me being a pretty bad cocaine and heroin user for the last 10 years the one thing you do need to understand is that when we stop or as peole say go into remission we forget how to control our emotions. We get moody, very depressed, angry, bitter and so on. There is one HUGE step that your sister made though, she stopped when she found she was pregnant.

The moodyness may never go away, 10 years is a lot. A doctor would say your chemistry will even out in 3 to 6 months but that is not likely. Just try to understand her a little more and you might see it her way.

ladybug8372
11-11-2003, 08:09 PM
well me being a pretty bad cocaine and heroin user for the last 10 years the one thing you do need to understand is that when we stop or as peole say go into remission we forget how to control our emotions. We get moody, very depressed, angry, bitter and so on. There is one HUGE step that your sister made though, she stopped when she found she was pregnant.

The moodyness may never go away, 10 years is a lot. A doctor would say your chemistry will even out in 3 to 6 months but that is not likely. Just try to understand her a little more and you might see it her way.



Boy, you dont make this sound easy at all. Its impossible to get along with her. I understand that she is depressed, I understand that her mind is not quite as it should be. But I cant deal with someone that wants to jump down your throat every time you speak. I cant help her. If you try, you get yelled at, if you do nothing, you get yelled at. I have enough problems with everyday life, I cant handle someone elses problems, that they brought on themselves. I have never taken drugs or drank alcohol, so no, I dont fully understand things. No, I am not a miss goody two shoes, I have just seen alot over the years . All I know is that life is chaotic enough, that I never wanted to deal with the problems that alcohol/drugs bring to your life. I grew up with an alcoholic brother, so I have seen alot,----enough to use my brains to stay away from it all. I have kids, I have a husband, I dont have time for someone to ***** at me all the time and keep me stressed out. She bitched and raised all kinds of cain over the last 6 months or so because I didnt contact her. She came in for a visit last week, we had a few words, because I didnt contact her, and when I finally said "ok, fine lets put the past in the past and move on"--she said " ok, l love you--and I havent heard from her since. She didnt call me anymore while she was here, and didnt call to tell me she was leaving. She wants it until she gets it---which I knew it was that way. We have a very dysfunctional family--dont know why--my parents werent abusive, they didnt do drugs or drink--we just grew up hating each other. For many years, I tried to have a relationship with my siblings, none of them wanted it. After being hurt so many times, I gave it up. Now that I have no desire, All of them are crying around because they "want" it. I dont buy it for one minute---and my sister pretty much proved it. Thanks for your input---not too encouraging, but then again, maybe there is hope--if you can call it that--that she is not using again--that she is just still out of whack. It has been almost 4 years when she became pregnant--so to my knowledge--almost 4 years clean of crack cocaine. If she is no longer using, I dont know how long this will last, but I cant take it much longer.

LaynesADDICTI0N
11-12-2003, 10:11 AM
some people cant save the world. You do have an agenda and a life of your own so it is your own choice whether or not you include your-self in your sisters life. If she comes to you for help, hold out your hand, if she's being reclusive give her an option for outside support. Just remember, it's in human nature to make mistakes. Sometimes it's a big one.

openseason
11-13-2003, 06:00 PM
Addiction is a chronic relapsing brain disease. Most times drug use is an attempt to combat depression. The depression is usually caused by hypoglycemia. In a recent study it was found that 100 percent of the alcoholics tested in the survey were also found to be hypoglycemic. If the addict can change their diet it helps them even out the depression and the reason for using.

LL29
11-13-2003, 09:35 PM
I used crank and cocaine when I was in high school for awhile and it is VERY addictive. If you've ever had 10lbs. to lose or even more - or tryin to stay on a diet forever - well multiply that craving times a billion trillion - and then you will have the answer to crack cocaine. I was blessed that my Dad came and got me from that enviornment or I'd be a statistic and prob. dead. I think for 6 yrs. I had an occasional craving so for your sister - there's no telling - why don't u just ask her? If she says no, then try to trust in her and PRAISE her for her success and the great things she has to look forward to.

I would say to look at yourself though as well because sometimes when others are bringin us down - we change as well and sometimes it's good to check yourself or have some self reflection time as to how you say the things you do, etc... Try to put yourself in her shoes and think of the things you've said to her before that might have hurt her so deeply. And when you say let's start over - TRULY MEAN IT AND SHOW IT. Don't say it just to be sayin it because from what you've written - it seems that you have not forgiven her fully and that you've tired of the whole situation. It's understandable so don't get me wrong and maybe you should get some counseling to make sure you and your family are not suffering from the entire situation.

Prayer always works for me - pray for yourself, your sister, and your family. :) She really has suffered dearly whether you know it or not. It's very hard to break addicts and the ones that do come clean - praise them forever and keep them strong - they are the true survivors.

take care :)

Laurie