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New_case_help
12-10-2003, 07:34 AM
I have a new boyfriend and there have been rumors surrounding him since I've known him for three years. We dated back then but things didn't work out, now recently we got back together.

Well one of my guy friends told me that he drove my boyfriend to buy cocaine and when they opened it, it turned out to be a crack rock instead of what they were looking for.

This guy continued to tell me that my boyfriend started smoking it in his car and he pulled over and told him to get out, but not before my boyfriend tried to get a few more hits in.

Anyhow, my boyfriend owes this guy money for this. Am I just in denial that this isn't happening and that this isn't true? Does anyone know what to look for?

Should I get out now?

Lisajh
12-10-2003, 07:52 AM
If you've been hearing rumors like this for 3 years than most likey it's true. If I was you I'd get out of the situation now, before things escalate. Being with a person who is known to smoke crack could make you look guilty as well. I'd tell him that he needs to seek help for his problem, and that you can not be with him while he's doing this. Trouble follows drug use... don't let the trouble strike you next. Get out while you can! Good luck!

New_case_help
12-10-2003, 08:09 AM
Too late sort of. I am waiting the final test results, but it's almost positive that he gave me herpes.

I really do care about him, but he denies that he knew about the having a std and he denies smoking crack.

I actually know that he snorts coke here and there and that he smokes weed.

I don't do any of the above, but it's not uncommon around where I live.

I think I just needed someone to talk to outside of this lifestyle that would give me an extra shove and encouragement in the right direction, which is away from him.

Thanks for responding so quickly and I could use any other support.

Lisajh
12-10-2003, 08:26 AM
You're welcome. Let him go, obviously he's no good for you at all. If he wants to do these things, theres not much you can do except tell him he needs help. I hope things get better for you. Again... good luck.

New_case_help
12-10-2003, 08:57 AM
Thanks Lisajh. I know it sounds like common sense, but sometimes you just need something extra to help you along.

Most of my friends find nothing wrong with drug use, so it's not as alarming as it should be and it's desensitised me as well.

No one knows about the herpes and I posted on that board too for support. I don't really have many people to talk to that are rational and have my best interest.

Thanks again!!

openseason
12-10-2003, 11:38 AM
Thanks Lisajh. I know it sounds like common sense, but sometimes you just need something extra to help you along.

Most of my friends find nothing wrong with drug use, so it's not as alarming as it should be and it's desensitised me as well.

No one knows about the herpes and I posted on that board too for support. I don't really have many people to talk to that are rational and have my best interest.

Thanks again!!

...................

New_case_help
12-10-2003, 12:47 PM
Thanks openseason that was very informational. While my boyfreind isn't as fully involved in crack like some of the stories on that site, I guess I can better understand what he'll be leading up to if he continues to do this.

I'm not sure how often he does it, I don't think he does it daily. Maybe monthly or occasionally. But reading that site information helps me better understand how hard it is for someone to walk away from crack and how I could be used as a target because I want a relationship with him.

I'm scared to go by 'the gossip" and be wrong. The only thing I know as fact is that he lives with his parents, his mom used to smoke crack, he doesn't have a job, he never has any money, he doesn't have a car and his step dad's tools came up missing. I know he does snort cocaine occasionally as well.

That's enough to get scared and run right?

openseason
12-10-2003, 04:07 PM
If your boyfriends mom smokes crack then he sees nothing wrong with drug use. Tools missing and no money means he is way into drugs. Run,Run, run,run,run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run

nelzun
12-15-2003, 06:47 AM
I would get out if I were you. It sounds like trouble that you don't need.

New_case_help
12-15-2003, 08:43 AM
Just an update & thanks. I did run but not until after this episode was thrown in my face and I was forced to acknowledge my (now ex) boyfriend's drug problem.

We went out Saturday night with mutual friends. I drove and paid. He left me at the bar three times with my car to run and "make money" by getting coke for other people. So there I sat at the bar, worried that he would get pulled over and my car impounded, but each time he would come back.

Then we went to an after party. It was at another mutual friend's house and like I said before, alot of my friends do drugs so it's no shocker. I just have never been personally affected by them using. The minute we get in the door he takes off without my consent in my car again and doesn't come back for over an hour.

When he came back I was understandably mad and tired so I told him I wanted to leave. Well since they already made a purchase of course he was not coming home with me and I haven't spoken to him since.

Thanks for replying. Because I know that he was just using me to get his fix and I was enabling him to use. I guess I just didn't want to see the problem even though I knew it was there.

I know I need to get some help myself because I have been overlooking the crowd that I hang out in. It shouldn't be so easy to watch my friends do line after line. I love to party and although I've always been afraid to try coke because of my addictive personality, I've been drinking heavily for over ten years.

I'm 26 and these drug parties and this environment mankes me feel like there is nothing wrong with my excessive drinking and I've even started taking Xanex and Aditvan before I drink to increase the buzz.

I will go a few weeks without drinking but then I miss the hard core parties and binge completely. Thanks all for your replies. It's hard sometimes to realize you have a problem when I purposely picked partners that had worse problems than I to mask mine. I hope you can continue to give me support as I try to deal with my own problem as I am just admitting it to myself.

lane7eir
12-15-2003, 08:53 AM
NEW CASE-
congrats on getting rid of the boyfriend and admitting your own addiction. i too am an alcoholic and co-dependant (now learning not to be enabling) wife. i am 33, married with a toddler. started drinking at around 13-14 and really became hard core in college and after. the hardest part for me was admitting i was a drunk but not a bad person. i am active in aa since 3-03, and am coming up on 90 consecutive days, after stopping and starting again.
i have found that the meetings and friends that i have made (who, by the way, i never would have given the time of day to before) have helped and continue to help daily. i also have noticed that the friends i hung out with before really are not that great or even fun to be with now. note: I do NOT go screaming around town about aa and how it has worked for me 24-7. i just have seen a difference in the quality of people i want to share my life with.
anyway, i'm rambling.....have a great day!!!! and happy holidays~
laney :bouncing:

nelzun
12-31-2003, 10:55 AM
Sorry wrong post

chefob1
01-01-2004, 12:27 PM
herpes will be a life long unwanted freind...i know a few folks who own it...you can work life around it but it can be unfreindly at times...also,the boyfreind is a crack head...trying to squeeze in a few more hits tells the story...and it brings big time troubles,stealin,lyin,ect....