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Bodendo
11-11-2004, 07:15 AM
C/T is no picnic. I'm on day 5 clean and I could barely make it to the key board! Day 2 and 3 have been the worst so far. It's like I can't sit still but I can't move. It feel's like I have and infestation of termites under my skin. The only relief I get is when I take a hot bath, but that only lasts as long as the water can stay warm and water heater stay full. Anyone have any tips? I'm hurting. I'd go see a doctor but I don't have health insurance, therefor would't be able to afford percriptions anyhow. I need to duke this one out on my own. Now that I am somewhat clear-headed I can't believe I was putting all that junk into my body!

windysan
11-11-2004, 07:31 AM
What kind of dope are you CTing from? If it is opiates then you need to try and stay hydrated(lots of water). Ibuprofen will help a bit with the aches. You need to eat. I know the thought of it is gross but go and get some Ensure shakes and/or Instant Breakfast and try to get that down. The best thing to do is lay down, try to sleep, let the hot water heater fill up, hot bath, then lay down again and repeat the process. You should be over the worst of it.....if it is an opiate cold turkey. Just hang on.

vamp36
11-11-2004, 07:32 AM
I know with my body aches of withdrawals , my doctor told me I could take 4 ibuprophen every 8-12 hours. I did and it did help alot with the aches. And alot of hot showers as you are already doing. Good luck to you. Hang in there, it will get better. Tina

goddessgrl65
11-11-2004, 07:38 AM
Hi Bodendo-
Its not easy-what your doing now-and i can feel ya-cos ive kicked some hearty habits c/t-and its ugly..but the beauty is-when its over-its over-and in a week to 10 days you'll be so much better-Hot baths are the best-
What are you kicking?
You will feel much better-i promise..physical symptoms will be gone soon-watch yer head though.
If you can get to a meeting-try a few-there good esp. in the beginning-even a good walk-i know-not right now..but when you are up to it.
Hang in there-don't give it up..stay strong-im realiseing we really learn so much thru our struggles in life..it really makes you appreciate all the simple good things in life-
Goddess Bless.
ggrl

Bodendo
11-11-2004, 08:04 AM
Before I quit I was wearing two 100g/uh duragesic patches every 72 hours, taking roxanol (liquid moraphine 30mg imediate release) and I was also crushing and taking 80mg oxycotins 4 times a day. It started with just vic's and vicaprophins s/p?

windysan
11-11-2004, 08:32 AM
Whew! Hell of a daily dose you had going there. I hope you have a doctor working with you. The very worst should be over. You should break through soon. Lay down, eat, shower, repeat until then. Hang in there, guy.

Sarandipity
11-11-2004, 08:32 AM
How are you feelin? I know what you mean about the baths. I was know as the "bath queen" at rehab. I took at least 5 hot baths a day. My room mates never had any hot water.

Just hang in there! It gets better!

Bodendo
11-11-2004, 09:06 AM
Unfortunatly I have no insurance, hence no doctor. I feel like I'm shedding my skin, I keep sweating through my cloths, I don't want to eat at All, but I forced an apple down this morning (and kept it down). Also my legs feel heavy, I feel like I can barely walk. I would take a small walk out side but it's only 30 degrees. On a brighter note, I do feel better than I did two days ago. On day three I thought I was going to pass out and wake-up in the E.R. I just wish I can fall asleep, yesterday I came across one ambien and was able to pass out for an hour but that only brings my total up to 4 hours of sleep in 5 days and 4 nights. Anyone know of any cough meds that are good to help you get to sleep? Thanks for the support, guys/gals. I'ts nice to know that people don't think I'm a looser for letting my pain management get out of control. Like I said earlier, my habbit started with legit pain. But after I lost my insurance I had to self-medicate to function. Unfortunatley the only stuff I could get my hands on was super-strong. Before I knew it my tolerence shot up to the stratisphere. The worst thing is that I didn't even know what w/d's where till now. I thought it would be like quitting smoking! Big Suprise eh?

Sarandipity
11-11-2004, 09:14 AM
Oh yea! I didnt know either. The way they explained it at rehab is your brain is telling your body you are dying (that's why you feel so bad), so you will take more opiates. The mind is such a powerful thing.

Also, your pain reseptors are empty right now. They were full of opiates, and I dont know how long you have been on opiates, but I was on em for 3 years. So for 3 years, my body did not produce the natural pain killer called endogenous morphine or dopemine. And so all of a sudden your pain receptors are like live wires!

The good news is it will be over soon. Hang in there! I know you can do it. I didnt sleep for 8 days. And hour here and there, but It's part of the deal.

You are strong for doing this on your own. If I wasnt in rehab I would have called the pharmacy as soon as my skin started crawling. You are very strong. So you can do it!!!!!

Please write as often as you need to... I want to know how you are doing.

I will be thinking of you,

Sara

Bodendo
11-12-2004, 01:05 PM
I'm still hanging in there. Today is my best day yet. A friend of mine gave me three Ultram. I took one and it helped me sleep last night. Has anyone heard of this drug? I was told it is not a narcotic, but mimic's one. At any rate it helped take the edge off. I have two more but don't want to take a step backwards if you know what I mean. Does anyone think it would be safe to take one tonight and the last one tommorrow night?

Sarandipity
11-12-2004, 01:45 PM
Bo,
Im so glad to hear from you!

Yes, Ultram is an opiate, look it up online. Its addictive. I called my doctor at rehab and asked him about them because I was hoping I could just take something to kill the edge off my back pain, he said they do the same thing as hydro's and oxys and anything w/ opiates in them.

It's probably not going to do anything as far as mess w/ your detox (well maybe not A LOT ) but a little.

Just stop taking them and see what happens.

So what are you doing to pass the time while you are dt ing???

Thinking of you,

SARA

Rach18
11-12-2004, 02:08 PM
Man I feel for you. I am not going to lie to you it will take longer than a few days to kick that kind of withdrawl. That totally sucks. A couple years ago I was taking Methadone 10-20 mg= to 1-2 tablets a day for a couple of years and when I weaned myself down and finally quit cold turkey it was a living hell. Based on what you said you were taking has to be somewhat of a simular withdrawl. I am not going to candy coat the situation by telling you to lay down and take hot bathes because that is only VERY temporary. My leg cramps were unbearable.I didn't feel like myself totally for a couple months but I will say that everyday is a new day and a struggle to get there. You should be PROUD of yourself it is extrmely hard. I can only tell you what helped me and not speak for anyone else. I took Comtrex Cold and Flu you can buy it at any store for about 5-6 bucks. They have the day time and night time. Benadryl helped a lot at night for a few hours of sleep and Motrin 800 mg. If you can get to a doctor ask for some Catapress Clonodine patches, they will help. Don't over medicate yourself which is easy to do when you are in that type of pain. If all else fails a shot or 2 of Jim Beam will do the trick to help get you over the biggest hump. But PLEASE do NOT drink a lot of it with the over the counter medication I wouldn't want you to overdose yourself just trying to give you a few suggestions that may ease your pain. Take care and best of luck to you! Hang in there it CAN be done!!

bluejulie5
11-12-2004, 04:25 PM
BODENDO
All I can say is that you are a much stronger person that I am.

How brave you must be to be able to go through with this.

Good luck to you!!!!!!!! YOU CAN DO IT

Bodendo
11-15-2004, 06:38 AM
Thanks, guys for the encouragement. Your kind words are taking place of the drugs and helping me get through this.

Well I made it through the weekend and the fog is starting to lift. Clarity is a wonderfull thing. Now that the high is gone and my feet are back on the ground it seems as if my senses are hightened or should I say not dulled anymore. I'll be honest and say that it is srough but I'm determined to grin and bare it!

I'll be around today so feel free to brop a line

Thanks again!

bluejulie5
11-15-2004, 08:15 AM
That is a wonderful attitude!!

Me, I just keep on tryin'...............
Its not easy.

Have a great day and keep up the good work!!!

cleanstart
11-15-2004, 09:31 AM
I was reading your story and wow you really kicked the you know what out of the habit. My hat is off to you. One suggestion is that you stay close to family and friends for some good moral support, we are hitting the silly season.

Cody

Bodendo
11-15-2004, 12:21 PM
I'm gonna force myself to go to work tommorrow. I need something to pass the time. Sitting around feeling ill isnt doing it for me. The last week feels more like a year!

My muscles are sore from all of the twitching but I'm managing to get around okay. I feel like my body tempuratue has regulated because I'm not sweating bullets in 30 degree weather anymore. The worst is the indescribable "skin crawling" sensation. Is there a technical term for this feeling? It's still pretty severe but not as bad as the first couple of days. On days 2 and 3 the feeling was so bad I screamed into a pillow until my voice started to hurt. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being equivilant to the severity of day's 2 and 3, I'd say that now I'm at a 5 and at night a 7. I'm force feeding myself to try to get my energy level up and I am taking some B-complex and vitamin C. I'm hoping that within a week or so I will be able to get a full night's sleep. Right now the symptoms are still severe enough to keep me awake.

Rach18
11-15-2004, 12:55 PM
Aww, Hang in there! It will get better. I know it is painful, I have been there and done that a few times. Methadone was the hardest for me and NEVER again will I put myself through that kind of hell. Going to work if possible will help you feel a little better! Try Benadryl for sleep, it really worked for me anyway.. You should be so proud of yourself. Everyday is another day of achievment and it WILL get easier.

Bodendo
11-17-2004, 08:29 AM
I think I've reached a tolerable Plateau. The cravings are harsh but I'm doing my best to distract myself from them. I've been able to sleep, and I'm starting to feel a little normal. The strange thing is that I keep having dreams that I am taking pills. It seems to be the focus of my dreams. It's strange, because throughout the entire time I was using I never experienced this.

windysan
11-17-2004, 09:22 AM
The dreams will be around for awhile. Sounds like you are at the tailend of the physical part. Be careful with the psychological part of it. It's a beeyatch.

Bodendo
11-18-2004, 03:12 PM
I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, I've made it 12 days C/T!! I can understand why the C/T relapse rate is so high. Like I said before it's no picnic. I made it a point to cut off my resources and flush my stash before I began this adventure. Not that I would take anything if I had it, I've come too far and can't let myself down like that. As for now I think I'll be okay! I'm just gonna take it one day at a time :D