View Full Version : My boyfriend has addictions and i'm scared

06-27-2013, 07:22 PM
I met my boyfriend 6 months ago we've been together since, at first he hid his addiction to coke and sometimes speed which i find lead to drinking often, but after 3 months he admitted it all to me, he's been addicted for 13 years now, it goes back to his mother who was also an addict . I asked him once what coke does for him and he said "nothing anymore i'm just addicted" he goes back and forth on it, he went 3 weeks without it once, but lately he's been doing it to often, he doesn't hide it from me when he does it if i ask he will admit it that he's on it.. i asked if he was ashamed to do it around me he said " I don't' do it in front of u because i know u feel about drugs and i respect that" He's been trough a very hard life as many of us did, but i feel like when something is not going good he'll do it, i don't know if the drinking is because of the drugs or if hes just a big drinker, but i'm terrified and i don't have anyone to talk to this is why i am here in hopes to find some answers and help. i'm madly in love with this man and he does everything to make me happy and reassure me of my insecurities but i feel like the drugs and sometimes alcohol are getting in the way of his happiness, it's a dependency every time something is not good he looses himself and does this, a month ago he did so much that he said he wanted to quit because he almost stopped breathing that's when he went 3 weeks without it. it's hard for me to hear in depressed because of things in his life and it scares me when he does this m afraid i'm gonna loose him and when i tell him that he always says " I'm not that lucky" i hate it when he says that it's almost as if to say he doesn't value himself or his life and that scares em and hurts me so much, this man is so amazing you see, and i try to make him see that everyday, i let him know how much i love him and how much i value and appreciate his presence and i try to be supportive and not talk bout it to much because he doesn't want to here it but its taking a tole on my emotions im really scared that he will overdose or drink and drive and kill himself or even someone else for that matter. please help me , giving up on him is not an option so what can i do :(:(

06-28-2013, 03:02 AM
Hi, I am sorry for all the turmoil in your life. It is important that you familiarize yourself with your city's detox and rehap centers and what their programs are because if he wants to get help you will be there with some answers for him. Get in touch with your local chapter of Narcotics Anonymous and tell them of his situation as they will give you valuable information for his recovery.. That being said I can tell you that cocaine is so difficult to quit because the longer a person is off of it the stronger the cravings get which means he requires continuous support which you are giving him.......good job.However he does not have any coping skills which is one reason he keeps going back to it, for relief. Now he is powerless over his addiction and can not live life on life's terms. Narcotics Anonymous can give him a new and better life while giving him support as long as he needs it so when he is ready this is the place he needs to be for the rest of his life. You are very smart because you know you can not get him to quit but you are there for him no matter what and I know your unconditional love is important to him. However you need to be prepared because if he continues on this path he will either end up in the hospital, jail or the morgue but please do not think that you are responsible because you are not because he is solely responsible for his own fate. All the best to you......