View Full Version : There's something wrong with me...

12-16-2013, 10:13 PM
And I know I should go to a doctor, but I seriously have an unreasonable fear of them. Maybe if I went in with an idea of what would happen, I wouldn't be so terrified.

I've been out of college for five years. During college I was fine, I was energetic, graduated with a 3.9 GPA, was an active member of several honors societies, and then for my first year as an educator I was fine as well.
Ever since that first year things have been going downhill. My primary problem is that I'm exhausted, but not mentally. My mind is fine, but my body? Geez, my body feels like I have fifty pound weights attached to each muscle. But even that wasn't too bad until this year. These past four months have become a joke. When I get home from work, I crash on the couch and can't move for hours. Not that I don't want to. My church's young single adult group is always doing stuff that I would love to participate in, but I don't have the energy to get off the couch. For the same reasons I haven't been exercising, despite having been an avid runner in college.
I burst into tears today on the way home from work. I can't live like this, this physical exhaustion is killing my soul. I want to get out and do things but I physically can't. I seriously sleep at least 9 or more hours a night and it's like it's not enough.
Yet despite my mind not being tired, I keep doing dumb stuff. Forgetting meetings with parents, colleagues, administrators, ecclesiastical leaders, paying bills. I've rarely earned less than an A in my life and yet I forget assignments for my masters courses until a few hours before they're due, which, for obvious reasons is negatively effecting my grades. I've been doing this since my second year of teaching, but it's gotten particularly bad since September.
And then there's the sicknesses. Granted, I work with third graders, I'm bound to catch a lot of interesting things, but so far this year I've had three bouts with ear infections and two bouts with strep throat (something I've never experienced before now, and hope never to again). I've also had the unfortunate experience of having a skin infection, which I didn't even know was possible. By the by, I only went to the doctor because pain and clogged ears prevented me from doing my job. I can't help but think the physical exhaustion, inability to use my brain, and the infections are related.

Sorry for the long post, I just don't know what to do, my symptoms are so vague, but I know there's something wrong because I just don't feel right. I know what that's supposed to feel like and I just don't. And I don't know how to present that to a doctor, who I'm already afraid of.
So I guess why I'm posting? Any ideas of what's wrong with me? How do I talk to a doctor about this? Or maybe just some sympathy...

12-16-2013, 11:18 PM
hi Kari

your physical exhaustion sounds more like mental exhaustion make some time for yourself and relax in a nice bath with warm bubbles and relaxing music. music is the key to the soul find the beat that motivates you and works for you

12-17-2013, 03:56 AM
I think you are exhausted. Most teachers I know go to bed at 9 PM! Teaching is hard work and you need your rest along with a good diet and exercise. It's possible you need a daily vitamin as well. I'd get a general physical and just tell your doctor what you've told us. It'll be fine. You just need a lifestyle adjustment and he can help you do that.

12-17-2013, 05:27 AM
Theres nothing to be afraid of going to the doc. most likely they may send you for some blood tests to see if anything shows up that could be causing this and you go back again for the results. it's all very straight forward. just tell the doc what you have told us here so they can figure it out.

12-17-2013, 01:40 PM
you really should see a doctor and tell him your concerns. Most things can get better with treatment. I had similar problems and finally went to the doctor to find out through a blood test that I had diabetes. Please go and get help

12-17-2013, 01:44 PM
I have experienced this kind of exhaustion before, and for anyone who has not experienced it, it can be very hard to convey how debilitating it can be. I have often been fatigued with this kind of severity, and there are some things that help and some that don't. For me, I found that getting on an anti-depressant (I also suffer from depression and anxiety) that boosts energy--NOT one that sedates, for Pete's sake!!--has helped a bit in the past. Since I have been dealing with chronic pain things have gotten a bit more complicated, but that's another story. I think you should talk to a doctor about this kind of medication, and even start seeing a therapist; talking about it might help you in ways you never imagined, like getting to the root of this via emotional release.

Another thing I have tried is meditation and regular exercise. Believe me, I know that the prospect of exercising when you are so incredibly weighed down with fatigue is daunting at best, but if you can force yourself to try maybe 10-15 minutes of yoga, pilates, walking, or light cardio, you may be able to build some endorphins and get some energy. When I first started exercising I really had to make myself, and it was not easy at all, but you'd be amazed how much difference 10-15 minutes a day can make. I used ******* at first, searching under "light cardio" or "pilates" and found small segments that I could try in my own home with no one watching me in case I felt embarrassed at my tiredness or even if I started to cry because it was so hard.

Believe me, I have dealt with extreme fatigue since I was a teenager, sometimes sleeping 10-12 hours and still being so tired I just wanted to curl up and never wake up. And when this happens, it is very easy to get sick, as you have been. Another thing that I find is that I feel a lot of guilt for my tiredness, and this does not help. Try to not blame yourself and to cut yourself some slack--it's not your fault.

Above all, I really do advise you to try talking to a therapist about this. You can even see if there is a support group in your area that you can join, specifically for people who suffer from fatigue; support is so important. You're not alone. Try to remember that, okay?

12-17-2013, 02:29 PM
You should see a doctor.

Best of luck...

12-17-2013, 11:41 PM
Make a list. Put the dates and illness as best you can in order. Do you think you had mono and didn't know? Maybe very good idea to go to the doctor and get full blood work and ask for mono antibodies test. B12 shots can help with energy a bit, but need it from a doctor. Lastly, are you the only person in the school you teach with this? Wondering if theres mold or something in the building? Its sounds like cfs, theres a ton of literature on that.

12-28-2013, 05:09 PM
I felt like this at one time in my life when I too was a teacher. I finally had my thyroid checked by a doctor with a simple TSH blood test and hypothyroid was causing the exhaustion. A small amount of synthetic thyroid & voila! My energy & positive feelings returned!

You owe it to yourself and your students to feel better!

Please get checked out ASAP by a doctor!

12-29-2013, 09:35 AM
Hi, I think babybongo made a good suggestion in having your thyroid checked as many people have thyroid problems and do not know it. Could be chronic fatigue syndrome in which symptoms are pronounced but many times very vague. You need to get checked out for your peace of mind as all of the stress you are going through is weakening your immune system making you vulnerable to all sorts of illnesses. Hoping you feel better soon....

12-29-2013, 11:55 AM
Kari your symptoms of exhaustion and memory issues could well be low thyroid, which usually can be easily treated with one pill a day to raise the hormone level. To check this, you simply need some blood tests-TSH, free T4 & T3, and antithyroid antibodies to check for autoimmune thyroiditis, very common in women. The other thing to check is for anemia, which just requires a complete blood count. A metabolic panel for blood sugar, liver and kidney function, cholesterol, etc would be good. If nothing shows up in those blood tests, a urine check and a check for lupus, another autoimmune disorder, might be reasonable, as it can cause similar symptoms with predilection for infection. That is a blood test too. A family history should be relayed to your Dr. so he/she knows what you might be prone to genetically. There is no reason to be fearful-as a set of blood tests could give you answers and a plan to feel better.