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I think my son has Aspergers

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Old 10-22-2005, 01:19 PM   #1
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Smile I think my son has Aspergers

My son is 4 years old. I think he may have Aspergers. These are the reasons why:

He loves his videos. He'll watch Bagpuss over and over again for a whole week, then go on to a different one the next week, but it's always the same video for at least a week straight.

He speaks in "movie-talk," as in the majority of what he says to me and others is all a mish-mash of what he's seen on television/video/dvd. No one has a clue what he's talking about except his father and I (and sometimes even I have to ask what he's on about). He "acts out" his movies as well. A lot.

He loves his trains. He can name every character from Thomas The Tank Engine, just by looking at a silhouette (sp?) of them and he's always correct!

When I asked him if when he hits Mommy, does it make me sad or happy, he said happy. Although that being said, he tells me he loves me all the time and is really cuddly.

He doesn't like the noise from the other kids in his classroom. He sticks his hands over his ears and yells "too loud, too loud." He doesn't seem to like the television or computer speakers too loud either. I can barely hear them when he's utilising them, and when I tell him to turn up the volume, he refuses.

At 4, he's already a whiz at the computer. He can surf his favorites, knows how to drag and drop, double click, open a link, etc.

He can count to 60 on his own, and when he looks at the numbers can count to 100. He's also able to tell you immediately how many bowling pins have been knocked down without counting and he's always correct.

He doesn't understand "personal space." He loves other children but often ends up scaring them or unintentionally hurting them by hugging to hard or kissing them. He doesn't understand about asking first, or why he should do it and as soon as he learns a child's name, he say's they're his friend straight away.

When he get's really upset, he hits himself in the head with either open hands or balled fists. That's really distressing for me.

There's more I know, but I can't think of it all. Not loads more, but a bit. From what I've read on the internet, it sounds like Aspergers, but does it to you experienced people?

Thanks in advance for your input. Any advice is helpful.

By the way, he's got a doctor's appointment in November for assessment on something else. Before I mention that I think he has Aspergers, I wanted to be sure so the doctor didn't think I was silly.

Thanks again!

Last edited by Amy42601; 10-22-2005 at 01:22 PM.

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Old 10-22-2005, 04:43 PM   #2
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geogal HB User
Re: I think my son has Aspergers

It sounds like a possibility. Think long and hard before getting an official diagnosis though. We decided to forego the label and instead became very proactive in his education and therapy. I personally know several moms who wish more than anything they'd never had that label put on their child. They've found people, teachers put their child in a box and it holds them back. I am sure you'll find other moms who disagree but with AS, I don't think the label is necessary. These children are often bright and will do just fine as adults. Most important is what you do to help your child through the quirks (i.e. social skills, obsessions, etc...)

My son's autism therapist was ready to have him get the dx at the age of four but fortunately life (or God) intervened and we had to put it off. When we talked about it a half year later, his therapists, teacher and all involved agreed that the label would do nothing to help him. Instead I found a very small private school to help him and it was such a blessing. I am now homeschooling him and that has been even better. We allow him to socialize on his terms now and have much more peace in the home as a result.

Anyhow, best wishes for you and your family.

Old 10-23-2005, 12:53 AM   #3
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Re: I think my son has Aspergers

Thanks, Geogal. I'll think really hard about this before his appointment in November. I've noticed the behavior, but so has his teacher, and it was actually his teacher that mentioned it to me, so they've really labelled him already. He does well in his school (they go to mainstream school at the age of 4 in the UK), and his teacher is lovely and really wants to help him, but I'm considering homeschooling him anyway. I've always had a gut feeling he wasn't a mainstream school kind of kid and I personally feel he'd do a lot better in a home-ed environment. The hard part will be persuading my husband!

Old 10-23-2005, 06:52 AM   #4
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Re: I think my son has Aspergers

I agree. I most definitely have some symptoms of Asperger's due to my severe OCD, another autistic spectrum disorder, but when I was a kid, "Asperger's" was barely even known. Now, it seems that everyone is becoming overdiagnosed just like all other mental illnesses. It does seem as if your son has a lot of Asperger's-like traits, but usually, the "quirks" DO help your child perform well in school. Yes, there may be some awkward social moments, but if you take the advice of the other poster and help him through it, I'm sure he'll be fine. You really shouldn't have to worry unless it starts hurting his performance and self-esteem. Also, if he does go on to develop full-blown OCD and it ruins his life like it has mine for all of my 18 years, then that would be the time to get medication. Good luck, God bless, and if you have any other questions, feel free to ask!
"Not everything that steps out of line, and thus 'abnormal,' must necessarily be 'inferior.'"
-Hans Asperger

Old 10-27-2005, 04:17 AM   #5
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tinatheone2 HB User
Smile Re: I think my son has Aspergers

This is the very same as my 5 year old son in every detail with some more at this end. He is in primary 1 and the teachers know that he has difficulties but are fantastic. In his particular school ( which is mainstream ) all the relavent people are giving him extra help. He receives speech therapy once a week and the Early Years Language Support see him once a week aswell. His school has a special needs department attached with a wide range of children with all different needs so the children become used to others with a wide variety of problems. My son also get extra work with his sums because like yours he is fantastic at counting so the teachers are not only helping with problems but encouraging and promoting his extra abilities. I know that not all schools are like this and we are extremely lucky. In our area having a "label" is not frowned upon and there are people who can bring out the positive aspects in their lives. I hope you find the happiness with your child as i do with my loving little boy.

Old 10-27-2005, 04:58 AM   #6
jeffreys mom
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Re: I think my son has Aspergers

Please don't take this the wrong way because it's not meant to be confrontational it's just my opinion:

When I hear the word " Label " about a child, it's like I am hearing nails on a chalk board. Amy: keep in mind for your son that having a "diagnosis" for an area of concern is only going to help his teachers understand him and his unique learning style. Don't let the fear of "labeled" deter you from doing what is best for him.

Does society call kids with leukemia, diabetis, or muscular dystrophy "labeled"
nooooo So why is this different? It's a diagnosis of a condition !

Good Luck with his appointment and do what you feel is best for him whether it's a dx or not.

Old 10-27-2005, 07:27 AM   #7
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BetsyAnn HB User
Re: I think my son has Aspergers

I agree with Jeffreys Mom. I think when people know what is going on with another idividual they tend to be more patient, understanding, and helpful. I think they also tend to make less negative assumptions. There is also less assumption about "poor parenting" being the problem.

Old 10-31-2005, 12:38 AM   #8
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Re: I think my son has Aspergers

I agree with you both, Jeffrey's Mom and Betsy Ann. I suppose using the word "label" was inappropriate. I know he wouldn't be labelled, he'd be diagnosed, and if that diagnosis is Aspergers, then we will do what we need to do to help him. I feel really positive about it all, really. He's a wonderful little boy with a lot to offer. He just needs a bit of assistance with some things. The school he goes to here is really good. More like a little English village school and his teacher is brilliant. She is very supportive and encouraging and has already helped me a lot with things to do to encourage Scott.
I'm nervous about the assessment, but only because I don't want Scott to be uncomfortable, but we have to know so we can then move on and do what we need to do in order to help him. Anyway, I'm sure he'll (and me) will be absolutely fine.

Thank you for your kind words and advice. It is truly appreciated!

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