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I can't escape autism( and other issues)

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Old 07-26-2011, 06:49 PM   #1
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xthegeminix HB User
I can't escape autism( and other issues)

I will begin by saying I have gone from a diagnosis of Adhd to aspergers in the last two years.I had many educational troubles at a young age and behavioral issues.I was placed in special education and taken out of district in my primary years due to emotional and angry out bursts .I was returned to indistrict for my final elementary year,I was slowly transtioned into regular education by the end of highschool.I suffered in HS with social problems and my adhd (now aspergers diagnosis)I began an eating disorder at this time as well that went undetected.I nattled cancer at 17 years of age to add more problems to my life.I reached my early 20s, I recovered from cancer, and my eating disorder got worse.I eventually went from exorcise bulimia to a full blown bout of anorexia .I had an inpatiant stay at a mental hospital , and then some counciling at an eating disorder clinic.I have been in hell ever since, the past 6 years I have been to council, on tons of medication,and been to many gastros for the hell my body gives me.I have barly managed in the last few years since the ed to return to comunity college to take a few courses and work a few dead end jobs.I had friends, its always strained because on top of autism I am always in pain.I rarly leave the house anymore,I tried in my early 20s to due the whole club /bar night life.I was found odd and socially akward but made a few friends.I have in the last two years had an outpatiant and inpatiant stay at a mental hospital, also i have been on meds that have made my stomach problems worse.I keep getting more and more depressed I don't enjoy exercise like i used to I am always in agony with my stomach.I have lost most if not all the friends I had.I am currently 28 with some community college credits.I have the long term memory of a termite , can barly manage to get out of bed by 11, up till all hours with my stomach.I hardly have any hobbies of interest anymore .I hardly leave the house and I am 28 with almost nothing to show for my 20s.I feel horrible I also happen to be a gay man with body dysmorphic issues,and aspergers,i have no money no succes and Ijust can't face people anymore ,I close my self off in the extension apartment to the house my parents gave me.I only have pride in taking care of that and my dog as well.I am just so alone and I don't feel like anything will ever get better.I keep hearing how a good number of aspies never get above minimum wage or run there own lives.I just don't know what to do anymore.I worry about a group home with pain on top of autism , I am comfortable in my current suroundings , leaving them scares me for more then a few hours.I also have to worry about living on a different schedule then my own with constant stomach problems on top of everything else.I just can't find the desire to live at this juncture.

I apologize for the grammer and punctuation errors

any advice would be apreciated

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