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Kellylillar 12-21-2004 08:23 AM

They want her out of the school!!
Hi! I need some help. My 8 year old daughter is in the public school system. This is her 3rd year at this school. She is on meds and recieves behav. therepy at home. She is aggressive towards herslf and others. Recently it hasnt been as bad. She had an incident where she scratched her aide and sp. ther. This has happened before and her tantrum gets under control in 10-15 min. so I am not called in to pick her up. This time the principal wanted me to pick her up, which i did. we had a meeting the next day to brainstorm up some ideas and figure things out. The only option given to me was to remove her from the school and put her in a facility for children and adults with disabilities. I dont agree. Neither does her aide at school or our psyologist. I need to meet with her teacher etc. But I dont want to walk in there stupid. Any ideas? I know I need an advocate. But has anyone had to fight the school system? Any advice would be great! Thanks and happy holidays to you , sadly mine are ruined because of this.

Asperger family 12-21-2004 09:38 AM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
I think your going to need a lawyer... someone who does cases for the disabled. Does your psychologist do IEP meetings?

Asperger family 12-21-2004 09:43 AM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
Oh, I went through this too, we had to intimidate them alittle bit. We brought a lawyer, psychologists, our family members, aunt and grandparents.We went to ours, getting straight down to business. We got everything and more we asked for. Good luck and dont let them intimidate you, these things happen.get special education book and know your rights.Good luck

findingdx 12-21-2004 08:14 PM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
What state do you live in? In my state i use a state funded advocate group, the name is Cause. Cause will go to your iep with you and help anyway you want. They know the rules much better then me and help me get what i want. Good luck. Plus I always use mediation team now to help with IEP that way school is not in charge of the meetings(this is also free of charge).

Asperger family 12-23-2004 11:03 PM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
If it is available, in my area, we dont have any advocate groups who go along with the child to IEP's, we dont have a pediatric neurologists anymore either.

findingdx 12-24-2004 05:08 AM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
What state do you live in? I think this is a federal funded program. Ask other parents with children in special ed if they know of free service or look in your special ed book of rules it tells about group that are free. It was not until another parent told of these groups that i discovered them. Special ed won't tell you about them it's a learn as you go process. Mediation is always free of charge for school issues but it sounds like you need cuase group as well. Your case hits home as my daughter is 8 years old also. We just found out this week that red dye 40 sets off major rages in her(fruit roll ups). Now i can control extra rages she has it's just getting everyday ones under control, but i have seen at least 1/3 less rages in her without red dye 40(just a thought).

If you tel me what state you live in i might have info for you. :wave:

Merry Christmas to all!!

Good luck

Annee 12-27-2004 02:48 AM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
Hi Kelly,
The first thing you should do is contact your local Autism Society or support group. I'm sure you can find it on line by putting "autism" and your state in a search engine. If they don't have professional advocates on staff, they'll be able to lead you to them. You might also want to contact the Association for Retarded Citizens (ARC) as they have extensive legal support.

Then, I'd suggest you contact your state's department of education, and ask for their special education office. My guess is that your child's school is not conforming to the Individual with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA). Many principals are not as familiar with it as they should be (or they just hope that you're not!). Of course, the school is only bound by the IDEA if they have proof of your child's disability.

Bottom line is that your child has a right to an education, and to deny her that right is to discriminate against her on the basis of her disability... and that's a big no-no!

krisssusan 01-12-2005 09:55 PM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
i live in md and here they cant do that. i experienced the same situation though when my son was young and i fought it but it ended upbeing such an insane battle, i moved to another county. I was on th verge of hiring a lawyer but basically they were better off left to their own uneducated he*&. I realize now, years later, it was the best thing i did. I realize now, to have fought them would have been fruitless because they clearly did not know what they were doing or they would have understood why he was that way and worked as a team to make things better. I still encountered problems in the new school district but we figured out the probelms as a team with me being the centerpiece making good suggestions.

krisssusan 01-12-2005 09:57 PM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
as with what annee said, your child has to have a diagnosed a developmentally disabled or disabled in general....then they cant do that to the arc i use to belong and worked with an advocate.

lfreet 01-13-2005 09:55 AM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
I have been through the same thing too. The first thing i would recommend is that you do not pick your daughter up from school. That is only rewarding her. We went in when it got really bad with my son and calmed him down and then left. You do need to get an advocate. Our school sabitoged everything. My son had 3 diffent 1 on 1 aids. The first one didn't "fit" with DJ. The second one was sent from heaven. But because of budget cuts (so they say) she was bumped. The third aid was very good friends with the resource room teacher and principal. I found out later that she was doing things like taking his food away from him at lunch so he would scream. (my son has never had a problem with lunch until the third aid, lunch is his best subject. I could go on and on.
I would keep a journal of everything. If it gets to bad go to school with her. That way you can see what is going on for your self. I would hide arround corners and what not so that my son wouldn't see me.
Eventually going to school was tourchure for DJ and we pulled him out and put him in an A/I classroom where he is doing great. We have great teachers and he is learning to read and write. The fact is the school didn't want him and were doing everything borderline to leagel to get him out. Our desision was right for DJ but every situation is diffent. Just remember you know your daughter better than anyone. Schools think they know our children better than us because they have a degree. Well we parents have a degree to it's called a BIRTH CERTIFICATE. We also have constant on going training.
Good luck and if you need anything let me know.

Lfreet :)

IBGECKO 01-13-2005 02:43 PM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
Every child is entitled, by law to a free and appropriate education. If your school system cannot provide your daughter with this, then they must pay for a non public school that can. Sounds simple, right? Wrong! The very first thing you need to do is file for a Due Process Hearing. Write a letter to your state's Special Education Hearing Office requesting a Due Process Hearing. Don't worry about what is going to happen at that hearing. You can always withdraw your request. Step two is to hire a lawyer or advocate. Attorney fees are only recoverable [B]after[/B] you have filed for Due Process. The school district is also not required to reimburse attorney's fees billed for IEP meetings either, so keep that in mind if you want an attorney present during and IEP meeting. Generally, having an attorney at the meeting is overkill if you already know you are going to sue the district. It's fun to watch them make all the bad guys squirm, but bottom line is that it's $1000 for the pleasure watching the Principal put on the spot for non-compliance. I would recommend going to the IEP without your attorney, and let the school continue to hang themselves. Attorney's love IEP's like that. Chock full of evidence for a Due Process Hearing.

Bottom line, there are two ways you can go: Keep your child in the public school system, with a major overhaul to her educational and behavior plan (does the school even [B]have[/B] a behavior plan for her? If not, more ammo for an attorney), or send her to a Non Public School that can meet her educational and behavioral needs, funded by your school district due to their failure to provide her with an appropriate education. What will happen is that you will be offered a mediation hearing to see if you and the district can come to a settlement. School Districts hate to have cases go to Due Process, and prefer to settle. Your attorney will do all the negotiating at mediation. If you cannot come to an agreement at mediation, then you go forward with Due Process, which is like a trial. All of this can be very expensive, and I know it is a lot to think about. Part of a mediation settlement or Due Process victory is reimbursement of expenses, both for the attorney, and anything else you may have accrued (educational testing, speech therapy, psychologist, etc.),

Yes, I have been down this road, and I'm more than willing to pull the Due Process card again if I feel the situation warrants it. I settled my lawsuit in September, and now have my son at a wonderful school where he is thriving. Take a deep breath and dive in. No one will fight harder for your daughter than you. Good luck.

I Love LJC 01-13-2005 08:39 PM

Re: They want her out of the school!!
A couple of days ago if you can believe this.I found out they had my girl in the wrong grade since September this year till now.She was a grade ahead.She started a new school this year.I thought her homework seemed more advanced told my husband geez our son didnt do this work in her grade..I found out she was in wrong grade due to a outting for wrong grade i had to sign a paper i said no shes in the other grade.I looked at her IEP for this year and no grade level on cover page or in report at all.

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