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I'm new here but need some advice about my son starting school

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Old 08-17-2007, 01:36 PM   #1
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: crazytown, usa
Posts: 19
Unhappygirl74 HB User
Question I'm new here but need some advice about my son starting school

He starts kindegarten(sp?) this year. I'm so stressed about this. He's been diagnosed with Asperger's with a speech delay (to me that seems like HFAutism not Asp, but whatever) and ADHD. He acts out physically...alot. He gets out of control when someone or something sets him off. So basically everyone sees him as a bad kid. He's a very charming, smart beautiful little boy when you get to know him. Anyway I'm wondering what kind of things you did to get your child ready for school. How much did you talk to the teachers about your child? The school psych. came to observe him while he was in preschool but nothing was done to help Logan. She said once he was in school that there will be a process of things to happen. What kind of things did your school do for your child? Did you have to request it? or did they do it and let you know?

I worry my poor son is going to sit at the front office all the time. He's already delayed in things he doesn't need to miss out more by spending his days at the office, kwim? How do I prevent this? Or is it just the way it's going to happen?

I came to pick him up one day from preK and they told me he was up there for 20 minutes. Holy cow!!! That ticked me off. What is 20 minutes going to do to him other than him miss out on learning. That to me is absolutely rediculous!!

Any advice or suggestion is so appreciated. He's starting this tuesday. I guess I should have been asking this earlier. I've been in denial about him starting school until now. I want to keep my little man home. He doesn't deserve this cruel world.

Don't mind me I'm just being a sad overworried mom.

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Old 08-17-2007, 03:56 PM   #2
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 190
Re: I'm new here but need some advice about my son starting school

when my son entered kinder. (last year) i didn't know what to expect. i was told he would have so much support, yet when school was a different story. the best thing i did for my son was to insist on an aide. she really helped to keep him focused and made me feel relieved about getting phone calls from the teacher regarding behavior. my son was in a mainstream class and not a behavioral child but the fact that he is special needs didn't make the teacher so thrilled about him being in her class. (i know this because my neighbor happens to teach in that same school and she clued me in).

i let a couple of weeks go by then requested a meeting with the teacher to discuss my sons progress. she thought i would be happy when she told me that she allowed my son to "take a break" whenever he seemed "uninterested"
in what the rest of the class was doing. WHAT???????????? "Why don't you just put a sign on the kid and really let him stand out." i explained to her that we do not make exceptions to any rules for him at home and that he is expected to follow the same rules as his sibs. she honestly had no experience with special needs kids and had no idea. i thanked her for her time and followed up with a letter to her and my sons aide with tips that would help them assist my son in blending in with the class.

by the end of the school year, he had many friends and several playdates.

at kinder. graduation, the teacher even thanked me for sharing him with her class this year and how the students really learned a lot from having him there. (he's a math whiz).

look up special education laws. there are so many things our kids are entitled to but parents don't know about them.

Last edited by MOM23ANGELS; 08-17-2007 at 03:57 PM.

Old 08-17-2007, 06:28 PM   #3
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 439
meechieny HB User
Re: I'm new here but need some advice about my son starting school

Things you can try: See if they have a "find your class room day." Most schools have a day right before school starts where you can go to school and find their classroom, cubbie and desk.
If they don't have that, call and ask if you can have a tour.

Try and see if you can get his bus route. What streets he is going on to pick up other kids. Drive him on it a couple of times and point out things he can recognize. Maybe you can even draw him a map with pictures of places the way. If he is walking to school you can do the same.... there is that red hydrant.....etc. He can take the map with him.

Let him identify with other kids. "Johnny is going too. He will be in kindergarten just like you." Find that familiar face.

Try and talk with his teacher beforehand. Most teachers will respect your involvement and help him out even more. Ask if you can have the class schedule and make a picture diagram of the things they will be doing in order so he knows what to expect during the day.

Go to the school and play on the playground everyday up until he starts. It will feel a little familiar to him even though it's just the outside.

Make sure you pack his FAVORITE things for his lunch.

Have something he can keep in his pocket as a form of comfort. Something that is small and not disturbing that he can hold on to if he gets upset.

Hope these help. It did for our babe.

Old 08-24-2007, 11:05 AM   #4
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: PA
Posts: 108
luckystar HB User
Re: I'm new here but need some advice about my son starting school

This is all great advice. I hope these couple days since he started have been good. It is along trial and error battle. My son is going into 10th grade this year. He was in Early Intervention at 2 1/2 and was mainstreamed by 1st grade. It truly is trial and error. You will see what works best for him each year. You will know more and more as the years go by. My district has an IEP, i am not sure what other states have ( Individual Education Program) I think that is what it stands for. I am drawing a blank It is so important that the teacher's be educated. Not just the teachers that have these children in their class. Our distrist does an inservice with all the faculty grades 6-12 I believe, maybe even down to K. Education for these teachers on these developemental issues is so important. Push for it. Find out if it happens and how to make it happen. I remember having these IEP meetings in 1st-4th grade kind of clueless. Now at this point I run the meeting. I say what my child needs and I make sure it happens. My child has always had an aide. This is a must in the early years. He still has one but rarely relies on her. But he knows she is there. Read, read, read...and yes look up the education laws. The more you know the better you can be for your child.

I hope this makes sense and helps.

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