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Looking for answers please . . . .

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Old 04-20-2008, 07:55 AM   #1
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Belvidere , Illinois, US
Posts: 1
imsmone HB User
Question Looking for answers please . . . .

My son at 2 yrs. was a biter, had a temper, and was not speaking at all except for ma and da. At 3 he was diagnosed with A.L.L. type leukemia. Before this I had his hearing tested, and his speech tested due to the delays. He was receiving in home therapy for his speech, but at 3 was turned over to the school system. Unfortunately, his behavior has also gotten worse. At school of course they tell me he is fine. At home he goes into these fits of rage to the point the rest of us need to take cover. He bites himself, and us, throws, anything and everything he can get his hands on, heavy plastic toys, shoes, garbage cans, he has even picked up our wood coffee table and knocked it over. He bangs his head into the walls, doors, floor, etc. These episodes last for times up to an 1 1/2 hrs. and the whole time he is screaming. He is on steroids only 5dys a month as part of his leukemia treatment, and when I told his doctor about this he told me to get a neurophyscological evaluation referal from his shool. The school in turn refused because they see no bad behavior at school. When he tested for his IEP, he was at an 18-24mos level. I am going back Monday for his second IEP but I am really frustrated on not knowing how to handle him. He still does not talk and he is 3 1/2 now. The school has not taught him sign language, though I know he understands what I am saying. He can follow simple instruction. His 9yr old brother is ADD/ODD, and bipolar, and his father is bipolar. I dont know if I am looking at autism or something else, but I am currently a single mom ready to rip her hair out. Please someone, offer some suggestions. The other night, he wore us all out, he fell asleep, when I woke up, I found he was already up and had shoved an unstapled staple in his mouth, and is getting creative on how to get on top of my countertops to get into cabinets. I really need some help here. My older sons pyschiatrist told me he wont even see my little one for testing till he is 5. I can't wait that long, he will hurt one of us or himself before then. What do I do next?

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Old 04-20-2008, 10:33 AM   #2
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 41
jennpape HB User
Re: Looking for answers please . . . .

Take your son to his pediatrician and describe his behaviors. Then insist your son be referred to someone who can evaluate him for developmental delays. Usually these evals consist of a neurodevelopmental pediatrician, a speech pathologist, and psychologist at the least. Together, they can test your son for any type of developmental problems (autism, ADHD, bipolar, etc.) Please don't let your son's pediatrician get away with telling you there is no reason to get your son tested. Lots of peds do this and they make a lot of unfair assumptions, like the ones I've heard: "Oh, he's a boy, boys are slower than girls", "All moms are anxious about their kids, give it some time and he'll outgrow it." Sorry, these excuses are lame. NO NORMAL CHILD DOES THESE THINGS AND BEING A BOY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT!!

I can also tell you from experience that my son often misbehaved at home but not at school. Even his babysitter acted like he was a perfect angel at her house. People started to make me feel like I must be doing something wrong at home. THIS IS NOT TRUE!!

I have also heard from parents who bring their kids to school and complain about how badly they behave at home. Yet I have never seen these kids misbehave at school.

No, it doesn't make any sense until you find out the reason. Anyway, don't let your son's problems make you feel guilty. Until you know what the problem is and how to deal with it, you cannot be responsible for his behavior. After all, if you knew what was wrong, you would have already taken steps to alleviate the problems. I wish you luck!

Last edited by Administrator; 04-22-2008 at 08:58 PM. Reason: leave your profession out of your merssages.

Old 04-22-2008, 01:52 PM   #3
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In the beautiful country
Posts: 5
MaybeImIndigo HB User
Re: Looking for answers please . . . .

I would insist the school do an evalution again, you as the parent have a right to have him tested, exspecially since he isnt talking yet. Dont let them fool you, you can have him tested because you have concern over his behavior(even if it isnt at school) and that fact that he isnt talking and he is well past the age where he should be talking, they are teachers, they know better. I dont know what kind of insurance you have or if as a single mother, if you have a medical card(which is even better) because you can take him to an outside speech pathologists and have him tested at no charge, and it is very expensive, and alot of insurance companies give the whole BS about how they dont cover developemental but only recovery. I dont know your area, but I would try to get some referrals from your insurance company, DCFS, or school. In the meantime, the only thing that really worked for us was to cut out the excessive dairy that our son was taking in, carbs and sugars,(candies, cookies, chips, juice, sodas and anything with flour) can cause a long drawn out temper tantrum or fit, followed by a complete drop or irritating mood swings. Try to encourage him to eat protein and try a baked potatoe(can be cooked in the microwave) before bed, it helps them to maintain balance and sleep. If you cant do that, if he isnt allergic, try celery and peanut butter, carrots and dip, or substitute sugar with those sugar free packets of artificial sugar in the kool aide. It takes awhile for the digestive system to clear out. Also, dont be afraid to ask for help, everybody needs help. I found a program through my sons speech pathologist at his school that is funded by the governemt that will send workers into your home(and you can do a background check on them, which they already have done as well) who will watch your child up to 50 hours a week. If they have a label of autism or another diability, I didnt even know this program existed. It doesnt matter what your income is, or your family situation, even if you just need a vacation, they will work with the families. I got to go back to school and they watched my son for free. There are resources out there, its just a matter of finding them.

Last edited by MaybeImIndigo; 04-22-2008 at 02:01 PM. Reason: adding

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