It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Autism Spectrum Message Board

Autistic parents?

Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 02-07-2009, 03:59 AM   #1
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Worcester UK
Posts: 1
riv3168 HB User
Autistic parents?

Hi Everyone
I was born and grew up living with my mother and father. That may not sound a very remarkable fact, but as they say, you had to be there! The way that I would describe the reaction of the members of the family, including myself, to my mother and father was that they were 'camouflaged', by that, I mean that we knew they were there, but we couldn't 'see' them. My guess is that when we were born, our father and mother didn't 'make the right noises and pull the right faces' that we instinctively understood that parents should, so we knew right from the beginning that we were going to have to bring ourselves up. This is a totally different experience than having parents and then losing them, in fact, by the time I was around 3 or 4 years old I was quite happily more or less looking after myself full time.
Let me describe my parents :
My father - He was a Construction Foreman working on what were then a lot of 'state-of the-art' buildings in post-war England, he drove a car, and did all his own maintenance and repairs, but apart from that he seemed to be almost mentally handicapped. I only ever heard him speak on about 8 or 9 times in the 20 years that I lived with him, and his understanding of what people said to him was limited to anything that related to a practical act. His face never showed any emotion, in fact he very much reminded me of the character played by Buster Keaton in the silent movies, with that deadpan face, no speech and no reaction to anything that went on around him.
My mother - When my mother met people, her face would light up, she would appear to be so pleased to see them, almost like a puppy-dog, if she had had a tail she would have wagged it! From this, people 'knew' that my mother was a kind, caring woman who loved the whole world, and in particular, that she loved them , and they thought that she was wonderful. Unfortunately, as soon as she turned away from them, her face would drop and she would totally forget having met them. However, one 'trick' she had was that she could remember whole conversations literally word for word without actually understanding what the conversations meant.
One of the most important things, in a good way, about all of this was that neither my mother or my father had any maternal or paternal instincts, and they therefore had no interest in their children. This meant that we were able to simply 'sweep them under the carpet' and just concentrate on bringing ourselves up. I had an older sister, and we fought like cat and dog. I've been watching 'The Dog Whisperer' with Ceser Millan, and how he explains that if there is no obvious pack leader then the other dogs will fight until one becomes dominant. My sister assumed that she would be the pack leader, until I was about 8 years old and became physically stronger than her. After that, you could feel her resentment against me!
Having said all of this, I can't honestly say that I have any regrets about my childhood, it certainly taught me to stand on my own two feet, all I did was what children have always done, and that is to adapt the environment that they just happen to be born into.
What I am really interested in finding out is if anybody else has had this type of childhood, or am I the only one! Please let me know!!

Sponsors Lightbulb
Old 02-17-2009, 08:31 AM   #2
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Derby, UK
Posts: 3
jamiew1988 HB User
Re: Autistic parents?


One thing you will find is any person diagnosed with ASD will have at least one parent who has strong autistic traits.

Now personally, I am 20 year old diagnosed with Aspergus. I find my experiences are not the same, to be honest I personally wouldn't want to go into great detail about my parents on a public board.

What I will say is my mum shows some very strong autistic traits. My dad doesn't really show any specifically autistic traits, but his social skills could be a lot better, though I am not sure thats linked to any form of autism.

Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Is my nephew autistic ptdrops Autism Spectrum 10 03-25-2010 06:56 PM
Is my daughter autistic?? karenpat Autism Spectrum 11 03-18-2010 06:58 PM
Talking to autistic people like a 2 year old personguy Autism Spectrum 6 08-10-2009 02:00 PM
Parents clueless about son 5 yrs. old Autistic?? jenavive Autism Spectrum 12 11-24-2007 11:46 PM
Autistic vs. Quirky, Eccentric, Unique, Obsessive el_9_el Autism Spectrum 8 08-15-2006 04:29 PM
Autistic 17 Year Old Nephew judyg1716 Autism Spectrum 3 01-17-2006 12:45 AM
Please Help: My poor parents & autistic 16 year old brother.... caliny222 Autism Spectrum 6 06-20-2005 06:53 AM
Anyone watch the show last night about the Autistic boy? 2cutekids Autism Spectrum 38 02-08-2005 05:00 AM
help! autistic nephew has regressed noobee Autism Spectrum 6 11-19-2004 07:18 PM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Sign Up Today!

Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

I want my free account

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:06 PM.

Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
© 1998-2018 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!