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Just been told my grandson is autistic

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Old 04-05-2012, 02:43 PM   #1
dusky blue
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Just been told my grandson is autistic

Hi, I'm new. I just found out officially in the last month that my 4yr old g/son has "mild autism" I had my suspicions but when it was declared officially, the words cut like a knife. No more beating about the bush in the hope that "things would sort themselves like he's only 3, still a baby really" I'll say this sincerely in the early stages of his development he ticked all the right boxes. He was affectionate, laughed a lot, potty trained at age 3 & no problems. From age 2 onwards he had difficulty articulating sentences. Even now if you ask him "where's your daddy" He'll say "In the house" or" he's at work" But if you say "what's he doing" he just stares vacantly. He does this to most simple questions.He seems to live in his own little world and is fixated by his little action men, he always has them fighting each other, HE will watch "toy story" endlessly much to the annoyance of his older brother who's not autistic.He dosent throw tantrums but he's becoming increasingly moody & uses a deep gutteral voice when he's asked to say goodbye or hello to people. Do autistic children regress? He seems to be getting more moody & not as pleased to see his g/parents as he use to be.. Thanks for hearing me out , this seems like a nice board with sincere people .Any comforting words from similarly affected people greatly appreciated.

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Old 04-08-2012, 03:37 PM   #2
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Re: Just been told my grandson is autistic

Hi my son is 3 and recently been diagnosed with autism and yes it comes as a huge shock even if you are expecting it. I had my suspicions however felt confused as he has some language and like your grandson he does not respond to questions very well, he will also repeat himself frequently.
He will often respond to a question by repeating it or always give the same answer.
He has huge rages on and off all day and will also kick, bite, hair pull, throw everything in his path and bang his head. We often have to restrain him. Its incredibly difficult as anything can set him off and he reacts so suddenly and often we don't know why.My son has sensory difficulties, and this effects his behaviour.It may be worth watching your gson and to see if his behaviour changes if it is noisy or the room is busy, any smells perfume etc, the lighting. All these things can effect behaviour and he probably would not be able to tell you if these things were bothering him.
He also does not react the same way to his grandparents.He used to get excited when he saw his gdad and play a game with him, now he for the most part ignores them and plays his own game, if they ask for a hug he says no in a rather cold tone.It is very upsetting,
I do not know about regression as my son showed signs as a baby, however different things seemed to develop at different times, such as hand flapping and toe walking which he never did as a baby although he never responded to his name until after the age of two or show good eye contact.
Regarding speech he had 4 words at 2, 15 words at 2yrs 4 months and it then progressed to learnt phrases which he'd repeat. Now at 3 and a half he has just started to put together some short sentences although he uses lots of echolalia and his understanding is at about the 18month level.
He is obsessed with thomas tank and will act out short snippets from the dvds which he repeats over and over and will not let us play unless he dictates exactly what he wants us to do often by forcing us by grabbing our hands and if we don't he will rage.
My son attends a specialist centre for autistic children and we have been adviced to play alongside him and mimic his play until he notices and then to do something different so as to encourage interaction. This may help your relationship.
I try to bring something fun into the play, like the other day he was playing trains and I placed a tray next to him with soap bubbles on and pushed some of his trains through it. It gained his attention immediately and we even played hide the trains. It was good because he joined in my game and I never intruded on his and he enjoyed th interaction.
I hope I may have helped and please feel free to ask any questions you may have, I know how difficult this is to except. I am still going through it. Take care

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dusky blue (04-14-2012)
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Old 05-26-2012, 08:05 AM   #3
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Texas
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golfhat HB Usergolfhat HB Usergolfhat HB User
Re: Just been told my grandson is autistic

With constant attention to this condition and the right physical and occupational therapy, many children can be "brought out" of autism or sensory disorders. My GS is not "typical autistic "but has sensory issues --- The B vitamins are very important!

If your gs is happy, talks and reads, plays well, but is socially awkward around anyone not in the family-- that is not necessarily autism. However, you realize he is not typical, so he needs therapy.
My gs symptoms: My gs talked on time but he didn't walk til age 2.
He had mild to moderate low tone in his midsection. If you don't have strong abdominals you cannot propel your legs or balance.
So PT helped a lot.

Also he had a problem with the way things felt to him. He didn't want to hold his bottle. However later on he would hold a juice box! I guess the feel of a plastic bottle was the problem.

He got private therapy from 11 months to 4 years by people who are working with children on the AS as well as children born with problems. This is important because you want your gs to be with children who are NOT on the spectrum. This is how they learn to change some of their quirky behavior.

My gs is now going into 4th grade. He knows the AB honor roll is not good enough. He is fine in every way, but is a little socially awkward. He sometimes rings his hands when he is excited. He still paces at home when he is working out an issue. What the issue is no one knows.

Right now he is is very interested in my yard and his yard! He directed the planting of shrubs and flowers in my daughters front yard last year.
He played soccer one year and didn't really like it. He will be doing cub scouts in the fall. I hope that he likes it.

I have a suspicion that my gs is ADD. He might even be slightly hyper. I think they will have him tested this summer. He goes to a private tutoring company for math.
YOu would NOT believe the number of kids who have to be tutored. It is quite enormous!

My daughter and I and her mother in law have made sure that he stayed in therapy until he no longer needed it. He has been in GYMNASTICS too. Swimming also.
It is very important not to delay all these experiences because you can literally change the diagnosis!

Last edited by golfhat; 05-26-2012 at 08:26 AM.

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