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    Old 08-14-2015, 05:06 PM   #1
    LeafMan's Avatar
    Join Date: Aug 2015
    Posts: 1
    LeafMan HB User
    I don't know what to do

    Hello. My name is Ryan and I'm 33.
    I've never posted on a health board before.
    I'm currently going through the long deal of getting my state disability.

    I just don't know what to do. It's a long story.

    Basically I have a spine disorder that has a couple different names
    It's called Spondylolisthesis.
    I've had it since birth I guess. I've been very head strong so I didn't let it stop me from living when I was a teen and in my 20's but now I'm scared. I'm like an old man now. It hurts all the time and has since I was 13. I cant sit still and i stopped working because I had been in construction for 13 year but I'm tired of lying to my bosses and saying that I'm capable of keeping up.
    I honestly just want my life to be over. I hold it all inside. I try to be tough but i can barely do what I could when I was a teen. I cant even brush my teeth without supporting my weight on the counter top.
    I haven't seen a doctor about this since 2009. I've made a lot of wrong health choices as far as taking care of myself. The doctor told me how bad he thought my spine was and urged me to be careful. He assumed I was going to use the radiology report to gain my ssdi but i didnt. I was stubborn and now I'm jobless with no other skills or will to do anything. I'm so angry at myself.
    I guess I just needed to talk about it and see if someone has any advice.
    I don't know what I'm doing.

    Last edited by Administrator; 11-22-2015 at 09:41 AM.

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    Old 11-21-2015, 10:36 AM   #2
    Join Date: Nov 2012
    Location: Modesto, CA
    Posts: 58
    lubear2003 HB User
    Re: I don't know what to do

    I'm not sure if my advice is coming too late, but I can totally identify with your situation. I've been disabled for 3 years due to my spinal stenosis , Sacroiliitis & Osteitis Pubis. This is all a result of a Motor vehicle accident in 2005. I broke my pelvis, Sacrum ,left hip & damaged the cartilage at both SI joints & pubic symphisis. I've been fused at L4-S1 & left SI joint. I'm waiting to have my right SI fused & Pubic Symphisis fused as well. My surgeries haven't resolved my pain & mobility issues, but due to my sacral, SI & Pubic damage, the surgeries are more of a necessity, than a quality of life decision. I've been on state insurance since March 2015, cuz my Cobra ended. I absolutely don't want a Medicaid Dr operating on me in such a delicate area. LuckiIy I'll be getting Medicare soon, and I can go back to my Ortho that did my fusion. I just went to my SSDI hearing, and I won! Make sure you gather ALL of your medical records & Diagnostics. It sounds like your Dr is on board with your disability. Get a good SS Attorney to navigate you through the process. It was re-assuring to have him there with me, and coach me before-hand. Unfortunately, most SS Attorneys don't gather your records for you, so you have to be pro-active in gathering a such as you can. The Judge's decision is based solely on your medical records & your statements.They all have to be consistent with the record facts & all of your written & verbal statements. In my case, I had a complete record file, that backed up the facts & my statements jived with my records, so the questions from the Judge & Vocational Expert were minimal, and concurred that I cannot work even 4 hrs in a work day, and cannot return to my usual occupation in sedentary work. It lasted about 20 minutes.

    Good luck to you & don't give up. It's so easy to get discouraged, but at some point you have to turn those negative thoughts into motivation. I've wanted to give up so many times, but my Dr motivated me to keep moving forward & accept my condition for what it is. Good luck to you, and hope everything works out.

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