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    Old 07-29-2005, 06:57 AM   #346
    heartlandguy
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=goody2shuz]And when we were engaged he cooked me dinner and had the ring around a single red rose that he presented to me as we sat down to eat.[/quote]I really enjoy reading about the special Tom and Goody moments. They make you two seem so real to me. …plus, a special friend taught me to look for the good in every situation so it’s great to see your special moments easily outweigh the frustrations you post more frequently about.

    [quote]Now that's priceless!!![/quote]It certainly will be. I can tell that you typed that passage with great pride as you rightfully should. For E, her future’s so bright, I hope she wears shades.

    [quote]my back is feeling so much better.[/quote]I’m glad to hear your pain is reduced but, again, I’m sorry to hear about your brother’s condition.

    [quote]my MIL leaves next week for Ireland.[/quote]Your loss is Ireland’s gain.

    [quote]I can't believe how quickly the summer seems to be going by.[/quote]That gave me a big shiver of guilt. As I mentioned last night, suddenly I feel so far behind concerning the pet project and Job One. I feel He’s given me a sign to cut back here so His will can happen. I’m back here this morning to reenter the post for Sophia (a cyberuncle can’t be protective enough). The board when down for maintenance late last night when I first try to enter it. I worked very late on the pet project to make up a little for all my board time yesterday. The thought of less board time always makes me sad but I feel better prepared for it now that I feel His hand reaching out for mine…

    Until some time next week, remember a 46 y.o. back requires more care than a 45 y.o. back. What a drag it is getting old…

    Last edited by heartlandguy; 07-29-2005 at 06:58 AM.

     
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    Old 07-29-2005, 07:26 AM   #347
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]That gave me a big shiver of guilt. As I mentioned last night, suddenly I feel so far behind concerning the pet project and Job One. I feel He’s given me a sign to cut back here so His will can happen. I’m back here this morning to reenter the post for Sophia (a cyberuncle can’t be protective enough). The board when down for maintenance late last night when I first try to enter it. I worked very late on the pet project to make up a little for all my board time yesterday. The thought of less board time always makes me sad but I feel better prepared for it now that I feel His hand reaching out for mine…[/QUOTE] Oh the guilt, my friend I see that we are both weighed down easily by it. But then again, it is the guilt that allowed me to give Tom a fighting chance of winning my heart and it surely paid off And I know it will in this case too. I feel guilty that I kept you away from the Pet Project/Job One but feel better that you compensated by working into the wee hours of the night. A wonderful sacrafice you made for this friend. So...knowing that we both are motivated by guilt we must embrace it and make good of it.

    My sacrafice will be killing two birds with one stone. I will not post here as a personal thank you to Mrs. H. for the sacrafice and gift she provided me for my special day. I want you in return to take the hand that is reaching out to you and grab it and trust in it leading you to where you should be. Do not come back unless you have news to report on the friends thread in regard to the pet project or Job One. I know you can do it, my friend, and I have a feeling that you will be coming back with some great news. So go to love & serve the Lord. I will be praying for you....Goody

    [QUOTE=heartland]Until some time next week, remember a 46 y.o. back requires more care than a 45 y.o. back. What a drag it is getting old…[/QUOTE] Hehehehehehehehe....this will give me many smiles when rereading this post.

    Last edited by goody2shuz; 07-29-2005 at 07:28 AM.

     
    Old 08-08-2005, 01:00 PM   #348
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    Hi, CBF I thought I would provide you with some reading material and return the favor of giving you a laugh since you had kept my spirits up so well these past few days.

    I went to PT today after a weekend of more back pain (we all know that it must be stress related ) I explained to the therapist how on Friday morning I couldn't even get out of bed and needed ice. Come to think about it, this wasn't stress related because it was the morning before my back posed a problem that K. disclosed her plans and before my brother even forwarned me of what was coming my way. My back cted up the morning MBF's hubby was going in for an interview. So it wasn't stress related at all. Anyway....I found my therapist coming in another capacity other than giving me great massages . I spent this morning picking his brain about the school district out here in CM since he lives here all his life. He assured me that everything is great and that two of his kids graduated from the HS we are looking into for E. after transferring from other High Schools in the area since you have a choice on which one to attend. (There are 3) He has one more kid who is E.'s age and he will be going to one of the others because most of his friends go there.

    We talked the entire time and he laughed at how tense my back was.....E. called me at least 3 times during my massage and he even said that he wouldn't want to be in my two shoes at this time and he ordered me to take it easy or I would be working him overtime. (I had also told him about K.'s situation and he told me that he thought I was doing the right thing) Amazingly....I came to realize in our conversation that he is just as friendly as I am and that I have nothing to be concerned about. For all I know he may think I'm flirty just by my friendliness when we know I'm not but it wasn't my hands on his body doing a massage....so I guess I was just being my overly modest self and misreading things. I felt better today after we spoke. And so did my back, thank God I didn't push the treadmill.....last time I did 7 minutes, 3 more minutes than the time before. Today I was just happy with the massage, TENS, Ultrasound and heating pad.

    And so the saga begins. So we meet with the High School principal/guidance counselor on Wednesday morning, go to Welsey for the tour in the afternoon and then head back on Thrusday with K. in tow visiting Univ of DE. on the way home for the tour and meeting with one of the business professors.

    I will be catatonic by the time we return but with my firstborn in my arms. (((HUGS))) ~ Goody

     
    Old 08-09-2005, 09:30 AM   #349
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=goody2shuz]Amazingly....I came to realize in our conversation that he is just as friendly as I am and that I have nothing to be concerned about. For all I know he may think I'm flirty just by my friendliness when we know I'm not but it wasn't my hands on his body doing a massage....so I guess I was just being my overly modest self and misreading things.[/quote]Your CBF says, “not so fast, my friend!” Long ago I saw a show on cable called something like “The Business Of Pleasure”. They made striking comparisons between women who were masseuses and those who were strippers. The similarities between the two were amazing. They talked about maximizing their profits by retaining their best customers and by “cultivating” new customers. Your previous posts about your PT sounded like he used many of the same new customer “techniques” on you. First, he mentioned problems with his spouse, possibly to see your emotional response. Soon afterwards, his contact with you became slightly more intimate without warning, possibly to see your physical response. Okay, maybe he has you pegged properly now… but think of the new signals you just sent him. Instead of having just summer customer potential, you reveal to him almost sooner than anyone that you are thinking about living nearby year-round and you’re asking him for advice almost like a confidant… at least he may see it that way. I know… I must sound like your mom now but I just don’t want you to let down your guard quite yet considering the circumstances.

    [quote]I will be catatonic by the time we return but with my firstborn in my arms.[/QUOTE]You sent away a girl and return to find a young woman. You must be so proud of her and your mentoring… and you timed it perfectly. Savor the moments! ( — beaming face as I feel your joy)

     
    Old 08-10-2005, 06:00 AM   #350
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Your CBF says, “not so fast, my friend!” Your previous posts about your PT sounded like he used many of the same new customer “techniques” on you. First, he mentioned problems with his spouse, possibly to see your emotional response. Soon afterwards, his contact with you became slightly more intimate without warning, possibly to see your physical response. Okay, maybe he has you pegged properly now… but think of the new signals you just sent him. Instead of having just summer customer potential, you reveal to him almost sooner than anyone that you are thinking about living nearby year-round and you’re asking him for advice almost like a confidant… at least he may see it that way. I know… I must sound like your mom now but I just don’t want you to let down your guard quite yet considering the circumstances.[/QUOTE] Wow...between you & my mom, I am going to be protected for the rest of my life. That's one thing that I love most about you....you still are my Lion on the road of life...only with his new found courage ready to protect Dorothy at every crossroad making certain that there is nothing dangerous along the way. I do understand what you are saying, and was a little disappointed in myself to be so naive to think the coast was clear to divulge such information. But my instincts tell me that it should be alright. A few times he has brought up his wife and kids in a sense that I can see his committment and thus felt a sense of being comfortable enough to get his input regarding the schools. I do not know many people in the area.....I will be calling one of the moms of one of E.'s new friends to further inquire, but the therapist had older kids and I thought it would be good to get his take on things.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]You sent away a girl and return to find a young woman. You must be so proud of her and your mentoring… and you timed it perfectly. Savor the moments! ( — beaming face as I feel your joy)[/QUOTE] This mom got zero sleep last night. I am new to this mentoring and it is not an easy thing taking a step back and allowing this all to happen. But I do know it is the right thing to do.

    K. is quite nervous about my inlaw's reaction to all of this, as is Tom. Tom & I came up with a solution of informing them that K. found an internship type of opportunity, in which she would work with a High School in Delaware in which students who enroll in courses that appeal to the Univ of Del would be more highly considered than other students in state & out of state. We all feel ccomfortable with that because it is in fact what K. in a sense is doing. I am sure that my CBF will share his feelings on that.

    Well...we're off. I will try to keep you attune to how things proceed. And again, thatnks for being my brave and protective lion ~ Goody

     
    Old 08-10-2005, 12:04 PM   #351
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [quote=goody2shuz] But my instincts tell me that it should be alright.[/quote]I trust your instincts, too. I just sense that you pay close attention to your instincts for a while longer. After your PT is over, do you see any possibility of returning to him for massages? Even hinting at any long-term use of him as a masseur could change things.

    [quote]This mom got zero sleep last night.[/quote]I’m not surprised by that at all, my friend. I bet there must be moments when it is hard to draw a breathe. How is Tom sleeping and handling the realities of your trip?

    Life seems to be geared for pain. If you didn’t allow K. to leave you this fall, you know you would have a stressful year and an unhappy daughter. Yet, doing the right thing as you have chosen is no easier and the pain is immediate. Life really is a vale of tears. The two things that impress me most about you are how you manage to stay so cheery in spite of all you must bear and how you share your sunshine with all you meet. Is Tom that way, too, or are you the sunshine for the entire household?

    [quote]it is not an easy thing taking a step back and allowing this all to happen. But I do know it is the right thing to do.[/quote]Your situation had me rethink how powerful human instincts are and how highly-prized children are. For a life partner, chemistry binds us for only a relatively short period of time. In a moment of frustration, what spouse hasn’t had a brief thought about jettisoning their partner? But with children (even problem ones), it’s so different… whatever provides us with strong parenting instincts lasts until they are adults or go on their own… that is, typically 18 years or more. After that, the parenting instinct seems to evolve quite naturally into mentoring. When you think about it that way, it’s amazing to realize that relatively few marriages survive 18 years yet parenting is almost always alive and well at least that long. No wonder you are exhausted, you are fighting with your instincts to be hands-on with K. for one more year. I pray for Tom and you to have the necessary strength.

    P.S. I forgot to mention that I can relate to E.’s situation more than you might imagine. Our family moved to a different city during my summer between 8th and 9th grades. “Junior High” ended with 9th grade in the city we left and ended with 8th grade in the city we moved to. Hence, I had no celebration (or gifts ) for graduating from Junior High. Still, I think it was for the best and helped me academically because I had fewer distractions. I give it two thumbs up!

    [quote] K. is quite nervous about my inlaw's reaction to all of this, as is Tom. Tom & I came up with a solution of informing them…

    I am sure that my CBF will share his feelings on that.[/quote]I have no sense of what they will say but, based on all you’ve said about them, nothing you can say will satisfy them. Apparently, you plan to hold back your pros and cons list from them because of how you perceive they will react. That is probably wise considering that the decision rests with Tom and you, period.

    Please don’t feel guilty for trying to be a good parent! Remember that guilt is strictly internal so no one can make you feel guilty. If you feel guilty around his family, you’ve allowed that to happen and lost control of that emotion. I must say that as a friend because maybe the thought of yielding control of your emotions to his family might enable you to respond differently this time. To do that will most likely require a little controlled, righteous anger to replace the usual feelings of guilt. You certainly don’t deserve the guilt.

    Whenever you feel sad, take pride in the great choices you made… K. is one of them. I’m not lion’.

    Last edited by heartlandguy; 08-11-2005 at 11:20 AM. Reason: PostScript added to third quote

     
    Old 08-12-2005, 04:18 PM   #352
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]I trust your instincts, too. I just sense that you pay close attention to your instincts for a while longer. After your PT is over, do you see any possibility of returning to him for massages? Even hinting at any long-term use of him as a masseur could change things.[/QUOTE] No way, my friend Once my 18 sessions are over he can reevaluate my need for further PT and will professionally submit a report. Being that I am still experiencing pain, I have a feeling I will need further treatment....I do need to get up to more activity although doing the tour at UOD certainly took it's toll on my back. There were rest stops that made it bearable and on the way home I needed my ice but otherwise I did pretty well. Once I get up to 30 minutes on the treadmill I think I should be okay.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]I’m not surprised by that at all, my friend. I bet there must be moments when it is hard to draw a breathe. How is Tom sleeping and handling the realities of your trip?[/QUOTE] Tom is handling it in his usual way....strong on the outside but a mush on the inside. I distracted him by reading a book outloud that interests us both about a woman who must go on a 3 day fishing trip in order to sign on a wealthy client for her NYC toy company. The man insists that only she can go along with an orthinologist (bird studier) hoping to get some money coming his way for a bird park. It has a twist with some romance....Tom likes it when I read aloud to him and we spent most of our ride doing this while E. listened to her Ipod or slept and on the way back at times when the girls were asleep. Funny....we got to a really steamy scene and I stopped because the girls were awake and Tom didn't like that. We have yet to pick up on it.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Life seems to be geared for pain. If you didn’t allow K. to leave you this fall, you know you would have a stressful year and an unhappy daughter. Yet, doing the right thing as you have chosen is no easier and the pain is immediate. Life really is a vale of tears. The two things that impress me most about you are how you manage to stay so cheery in spite of all you must bear and how you share your sunshine with all you meet. Is Tom that way, too, or are you the sunshine for the entire household?[/QUOTE] Tom is a kidder....sometimes to a fault. A few times this week we got into what you refer to as the "nitpicking" mode. On the tour when I kidded K. about how I could go on to grad school he said...."and why would you even do that???" I lashed back at how it was already painful enough for me to admit my limitations but that his pointing it out even in a kiddinglike way only caused me pain and that he could have been a little more sensitive by playing along. Also, just before we left for DE I commented on how my birthday flowers were ready to be dumped and could he take care of disposing of them. I said that he could replace them at any time and he said, "Oh you don't need flowers." I went on to tell him that flowers were to me like his need that I had satisfied the previous night and that I guess that memory would last as long as mine of the flowers he was disposing of. (Sound familiar???) He laughed.

    We got home and he wanted HIS flowers and I reminded him that he really didn't need HIS flowers just like I didn't need mine. He said that I like his type of flowers just as much and I said perhaps but still he was ignoring my needs just as much as I was his. He rolled over. I guess neither one of us are getting any flowers this week

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Your situation had me rethink how powerful human instincts are and how highly-prized children are. For a life partner, chemistry binds us for only a relatively short period of time. In a moment of frustration, what spouse hasn’t had a brief thought about jettisoning their partner? But with children (even problem ones), it’s so different… whatever provides us with strong parenting instincts lasts until they are adults or go on their own… that is, typically 18 years or more. After that, the parenting instinct seems to evolve quite naturally into mentoring. When you think about it that way, it’s amazing to realize that relatively few marriages survive 18 years yet parenting is almost always alive and well at least that long. No wonder you are exhausted, you are fighting with your instincts to be hands-on with K. for one more year. I pray for Tom and you to have the necessary strength.[/QUOTE] Yes, my friend your predictions are so shockingly true Your prayers are much appreciated.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]P.S. I forgot to mention that I can relate to E.’s situation more than you might imagine. Our family moved to a different city during my summer between 8th and 9th grades. “Junior High” ended with 9th grade in the city we left and ended with 8th grade in the city we moved to. Hence, I had no celebration (or gifts ) for graduating from Junior High. Still, I think it was for the best and helped me academically because I had fewer distractions. I give it two thumbs up! [/QUOTE] Thanks for sharing this with me....it makes me feel better. As if to throw me into further turmoil, E. just came to me & informed me that K. may be having second thoughts after speaking to her friends and getting home. Any words of wisdom on that??.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Please don’t feel guilty for trying to be a good parent! Remember that guilt is strictly internal so no one can make you feel guilty. If you feel guilty around his family, you’ve allowed that to happen and lost control of that emotion. I must say that as a friend because maybe the thought of yielding control of your emotions to his family might enable you to respond differently this time. To do that will most likely require a little controlled, righteous anger to replace the usual feelings of guilt. You certainly don’t deserve the guilt.[/QUOTE] I shared this with Tom on our ride back....he was comforted by your words and we both realize that we can easily allow guilt to weigh us down as we have in the past. But this time we have promised one another that we won't.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Whenever you feel sad, take pride in the great choices you made… K. is one of them. I’m not lion’. [/QUOTE]

    Thanks again, my CBF ~ Goody

    Update ~ I asked Tom to run out to the store to get lettuce for our tacos that I had forgotten. In walks E. with a few bags and a bouquet of white roses. I made the BIG mistake of thanking E. for being so thoughtful as to present me with such beautiful roses when Tom walked in 5 minutes later. I know.....it's a bad call but the way they were delivered almost gave me the message that they were more for him than me. (BIG EEK) And as I recall, white roses mean peace or I am sorry. Perhaps I should give them back. I also told Tom that the way in which they were delivered would be equivalent to my just laying there when he got his flowers. Hehehehehehehehe....I'm never gonna get flowers again, am I??? I know, I blew it big time!!!!

    Last edited by goody2shuz; 08-12-2005 at 05:41 PM.

     
    Old 08-15-2005, 09:03 AM   #353
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=goody2shuz]Once I get up to 30 minutes on the treadmill I think I should be okay.[/quote]I really hope so. I’m starting to be able to empathize with you more… about a month ago, I first developed a shooting pain on the top on my foot about an inch in front of the ankle… It was diagnosed with tendonitis and I’m taking a NSAID for it. I seem to constantly aggravate the condition so progress is very slow. Maybe 5 years ago, I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes so any changes related to my extremities cause great concern. Since going on a “low” carb maintenance diet and extending my exercise sessions to an hour, my blood sugar test results have been called excellent since they fall in the normal range. So I thought sharing my being a “spineless wimp” might make you feel less lonely as you travel the road to recovery. Remember that being spineless means I’ll never have back pain.

    [quote]I said that he could replace them at any time and he said, "Oh you don't need flowers." I went on to tell him that flowers were to me like his need that I had satisfied the previous night and that I guess that memory would last as long as mine of the flowers he was disposing of. ………… he was ignoring my needs just as much as I was his. He rolled over. I guess neither one of us are getting any flowers this week ………… In walks E. with a few bags and a bouquet of white roses.[/quote]Wow! The cold war at Goody Central is heating up again. Goody, Tom is a man who has demonstrated countless times that he’d do anything for you once he knows what you want. This exception is very striking. He clearly knows what you want but is resisting you over something that seems almost trivial to me. Thus far, I think you have treated this issue like he simply didn’t understand how you feel about receiving flowers. I think you must look elsewhere for the answer now. I can’t help but feel he has a problem with some aspect of buying flowers. Maybe he feels it’s embarrassing or unmanly. Maybe he feels uncomfortable at the flower shop counter expressing to the florist what he thinks you want. Maybe he relates flowers to something bad that has nothing to do with you.

    As your friend, I’d suggest giving Tom HIS flowers and asking him afterwards to talk about why he is so reluctant to give you flowers. If he doesn’t open up, ask him some of the questions I asked to hopefully get him started talking. Having E. deliver your flowers that I assume he bought really shows how badly he wants to distance himself from giving them to you. I take great pride in giving my wonderful wife flowers because it is a great way for me to reciprocate the love she demonstrates when she gives me her best. Since Tom must not get that feeling in spite of being a very giving man, I think you will learn something you never realized about him if you can solve this puzzle. You are a great detective and you need to apply that ability to this situation, my dear Watson. (he said smoking a cyber pipe )

    [quote]Yes, my friend your predictions are so shockingly true[/quote]I’m amazed at how often that words like insight and predictions are used to describe my posts. I really believe history does repeat itself so many of my “predictions” are simply the recognition of something familiar that seems likely to be repeated. Apparently, I have a lot of “been there, done that” to work with…

    [quote]E. just came to me & informed me that K. may be having second thoughts after speaking to her friends and getting home.[/quote]Are you saying that K. may consider attending her senior year on Long Island? If so, it really shows how vulnerable she is to peer pressure. If she is that vulnerable, think of what problems that would most likely lead to if she was a senior on LI. To abandon her plans for DE and UOD shows a lack of resolve for her long-term good. I’ve heard on TV that brain development for good judgment and decision making doesn’t end until the early twenties so delayed gratification isn’t easy for most teenagers. I’m sure you realize that you must dig into this deeper.
    ***UPDATE*** After seeing another thread, I assume the quote is no longer applicable.

    Last edited by heartlandguy; 08-15-2005 at 11:07 AM.

     
    Old 08-15-2005, 02:21 PM   #354
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy] So I thought sharing my being a “spineless wimp” might make you feel less lonely as you travel the road to recovery. Remember that being spineless means I’ll never have back pain. [/QUOTE]

    I guess the two of us will be limping down the road together. But we'll still be smiling, won't we???

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy] Thus far, I think you have treated this issue like he simply didn’t understand how you feel about receiving flowers. I think you must look elsewhere for the answer now. I can’t help but feel he has a problem with some aspect of buying flowers.[/QUOTE] Ironically, Tom's sending me beautiful roses on Nurse Recognition Day while we were dating won my heart. We started dating in April and in May he sent the flowers to the hospital to WOW me. And it worked. At the time I was dating several different guys through the personal ads and one guy at work. The roses and thoughtfulness allowed me to take the risk to go exclusive once again. Like you I am perplexed why he has such a problem doing something that he KNOWS makes me happy. I don't even expect them from a florist.....just a bouquet from the supermarket is just fine.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Having E. deliver your flowers that I assume he bought really shows how badly he wants to distance himself from giving them to you. I take great pride in giving my wonderful wife flowers because it is a great way for me to reciprocate the love she demonstrates when she gives me her best. Since Tom must not get that feeling in spite of being a very giving man, I think you will learn something you never realized about him if you can solve this puzzle. You are a great detective and you need to apply that ability to this situation, my dear Watson. (he said smoking a cyber pipe )[/QUOTE] I think the flowers issue needs to have a break lest I sound like the wind again. Like you noticed.....having E. deliver them took the WOW out of it.....I let Tom know this by my reaction and he reacted saying "Oh why do I even bother???" I hugged him and said it was wonderful that he thought of it but the way in which he delivered them was interpreted to me in one of two ways....first that he wanted HIS flowers and so got the flowers in a selfish way rather than a loving way and second if he could think about HIS flowers and I had just laid there it would be as if I delivered them to him in the same way. So for now I need to lay off....I even kidded because Tom's last single friend, the last three times he came for a visit he bought me a beautiful hanging basket of pansies and then an even bigger planter of pansies and just yesterday arrived with a lovely tropical palm plant. But I will give it some time and see what happens. For now I am enjoying a dozen and a half of beautiful roses.


    [QUOTE=Heartlandguy]Are you saying that K. may consider attending her senior year on Long Island? If so, it really shows how vulnerable she is to peer pressure. If she is that vulnerable, think of what problems that would most likely lead to if she was a senior on LI. To abandon her plans for DE and UOD shows a lack of resolve for her long-term good. I’ve heard on TV that brain development for good judgment and decision making doesn’t end until the early twenties so delayed gratification isn’t easy for most teenagers. I’m sure you realize that you must dig into this deeper.
    ***UPDATE*** After seeing another thread, I assume the quote is no longer applicable.[/QUOTE] You are right....K. and I have spoken daily about how she feels about her decision and is still going through with it. She has already been signed out of her High School on Long Island and the Legal Guardianship papers were mailed out today. Next her schedule will be filled out & she will be registered at her new HS in DE. I will call over to the new HS tomorrow & speak to the guidance counselor who will be following K. throughout the year.

    Went to PT and the therapist asked how all was going. I was vague and his secretary was on vacation and he was running around much more than usual. I was relieved to see that this was so.....he definitely was professional in regard to being in the office all by himself. So my instincts tell me that all is okay. He asked about what we had decided about E. and I was honest in telling him that emotionally and physically I was not ready to make that decision as of yet.

    It's rainy here and thank goodness my back is doing quite well. Feels like it did prior to my nerve involvement only on the med now. I am sorry to hear about your tendonitis...I imagine that you must feel the limitations in being able to cycle as usual. How are you doing with the med??? And hats off to you for doing so well with the diabetes....you must be proud and it is wise to change your diet and avoid at all cost having to be insulin dependent. That's your friend's advice and exercise and diet will be your best friend with how things go as you already know.

    I am glad that you are back...I was lonely around here and not able to check in as often since K. & I are keeping busy. Mornings are good because she sleeps in as well as evenings. This week she will be seeing lots of her friends. The boy I told you about who I have had my eye on for K. reacted badly to her news. He punched a wall and started crying...funny how he has a steady GF.....but I see him as being a perfect match for K. My instincts tell me that they may meet up in the future. He is going into the Coast Guard and there is a Coast Guard station in CM and in DE as well. Hmmmmm.......who knows but I still like the guy and hope that K. will find someone like him. He has a great head on his shoulders and isn't one of the friends who has a bad influence on K. He's in a whole different group and someone who looks out for K. in a protective sorta way. K. has told me that he's her best guy friend.....so I guess he's her Heartland and that's not a bad thing.

    Big ((HUGS)) ~ Goody

     
    Old 08-16-2005, 10:36 AM   #355
    heartlandguy
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=goody2shuz]I guess the two of us will be limping down the road together. But we'll still be smiling, won't we???[/quote]

    [quote]For now I am enjoying a dozen and a half of beautiful roses.[/quote]Ahhhhhh!!! Life is never boring, is it?

    [quote]I am sorry to hear about your tendonitis...I imagine that you must feel the limitations in being able to cycle as usual.[/quote]The motion that causes pain is the type of motion used to operate a car’s floor pedals so driving the car is very painful unless I constantly “lock” my ankle in its normal position. Amazingly, I feel no pain whatsoever when I cycle… most likely because the cleats on the shoes that lock onto the pedals don’t let the pressure go forward of the balls of my feet. I can pedal standing up while going uphill so I’ve been blessed not to lose a source of exercise I enjoy so much.

    [quote]How are you doing with the med???[/quote]I have no side-effects if that is what you are asking. As I said before, [I]I seem to constantly aggravate the condition so progress is very slow.[/I] Driving causes much of the aggravation.

    [quote]hats off to you for doing so well with the diabetes....you must be proud and it is wise to change your diet and avoid at all cost having to be insulin dependent. That's your friend's advice and exercise and diet will be your best friend with how things go as you already know.[/quote]As you know, my friend, I got a very clear sign last year to lose weight via diet and exercise. I’ve impressed myself that I could maintain a weight loss since I’ve quickly failed to maintain the loss several times before. I guess the stakes weren’t high enough until this time.

    [quote]The boy I told you about who I have had my eye on for K. reacted badly to her news. He punched a wall and started crying...funny how he has a steady GF.....but I see him as being a perfect match for K. My instincts tell me that they may meet up in the future. …………. K. has told me that he's her best guy.[/QUOTE]My friend, some of your best lines really tickle me. Since it’s not easy to find them online or get you to repeat them if off-topic, I’ve cut and pasted some of your best. (I hope that doesn’t put me in the same category as your butcher. ) One seems so appropriate here… “[I]I dated a guy who worked in the blood lab at the hospital who was my friend but as we all know friends do not work out as boyfriends.[/I]” Since K. sees this boy as “her best guy”, how can you still see him as “a perfect match”?
    Riddle me this, Batman!

    Last edited by heartlandguy; 08-16-2005 at 10:41 AM.

     
    Old 08-16-2005, 12:06 PM   #356
    goody2shuz
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Ahhhhhh!!! Life is never boring, is it?[/QUOTE] If it were then we would not be of the norm, would we??? "Boring" & "unskilled".....the two of us could never be accused of that, could we???

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]The motion that causes pain is the type of motion used to operate a car’s floor pedals so driving the car is very painful unless I constantly “lock” my ankle in its normal position. Amazingly, I feel no pain whatsoever when I cycle… most likely because the cleats on the shoes that lock onto the pedals don’t let the pressure go forward of the balls of my feet. I can pedal standing up while going uphill so I’ve been blessed not to lose a source of exercise I enjoy so much.[/QUOTE] I'm glad that it doesn't interfere with your passion for cycling and mode of keeping yourself fit. I know how important that is to you & your health. Now the car situation is another thing because if my calculations are acurate with God's blessings, you are going to have to drive to and from a job real soon.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]I have no side-effects if that is what you are asking. As I said before, [I]I seem to constantly aggravate the condition so progress is very slow.[/I] Driving causes much of the aggravation.[/QUOTE] I guess you can imagine the frustration that I must face on a daily basis. Although I can walk, I must think constantly about being careful with most things so as not to aggravate my condition. It's become a way of life for me but I still consider myself blessed.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]As you know, my friend, I got a very clear sign last year to lose weight via diet and exercise. I’ve impressed myself that I could maintain a weight loss since I’ve quickly failed to maintain the loss several times before. I guess the stakes weren’t high enough until this time. [/QUOTE] I envy you....I wish I could get back to being able to do that. That is my goal and I am trying to be patient. Cutting calories isn't enough once your middle aged. I want to ride a bicycle and walk a few miles again.....I am not giving up.

    [QUOTE=heartlandguy]My friend, some of your best lines really tickle me. Since it’s not easy to find them online or get you to repeat them if off-topic, I’ve cut and pasted some of your best. (I hope that doesn’t put me in the same category as your butcher. ) One seems so appropriate here… “[I]I dated a guy who worked in the blood lab at the hospital who was my friend but as we all know friends do not work out as boyfriends.[/I]” Since K. sees this boy as “her best guy”, how can you still see him as “a perfect match”?
    Riddle me this, Batman! [/QUOTE] Ha ha ha....you are so funny. If I ever need someone to remind me that I can be a walking contradiction I'll just count on YOU for that!!!! I know....but it's just the kind of boy I want for my firstborn. And you never know....a simple twist of fate is all we need. And BTW...have I told you lately how blessed I amto have a CBF like you??? Our miracles are happening....yours is next my friend!!! ~ Goody

     
    Old 08-16-2005, 04:30 PM   #357
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    Hi Goody. I've been in the fibro site for two weeks. I saw my PCP who got MRI results before pain doc. I have DDD, too. I've been under medicating. I hope you can get your pain under control. It's pretty old being so helpless and needing assistance for so much. I'm a 62 female. But fibro would tell you that pretty much. I'm supposed to have injections that will be done at the outpatient surgery center. Bear with me. I', dyslexic and often addled by fibro fog. I've tried ice and heat. Ice is a new try and it seems to work better for me. I have no idea what is fibro or DDD. Have you or anyone out there had injections for DDD? I have no idea yet where it's located. It could have been a lot worse such as cancer. But what I'm looking for is a silver lining without a cloud in front of it. I'd like to hear form anyone who has had injections. How often are they given? painful? As if that should matter at this stage. Goody, do you have a good doctor? I fired my PCP. Should have done it long before. New one pointed me to pain doc who lacks bedside manner but at this point that doesn't count. The old PCP was a sweeheart. Incompetent but nice. Are women more likley to put up with doctor-god issue for much longer than any man would. I'm rambling. I hope you can get some good help. nothing better than "been there-done that" when it comes to pain/syndromes/coping tips. I'll take all the suggetions I can. I have a Dummies book for Fybro. Are there any good books for us non-med types anyone would recommend? Comfort to you all. Judy

     
    Old 08-16-2005, 05:36 PM   #358
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    Re: Degenerative Discs & Pain Management

    Hi, Judy Thanks for checking in. I have had DDD for over 15 years now and for the most part I have been able to manage it with antiinflammatory meds until my last exacerbation which went into nerve involvement. At the time I was on Celebrex which I would take when things went chronic in terms of pain. I didn't like being on meds unecessarioy with the frame of mind that if I took them too much I wouldn't have anything left for me when I was older in my 60's, 70's, 80's. My biggest fear with this condition is not being able to walk and so I make sure that I take care of myself in terms of avoiding injury to my back. That means avoiding many activities that I use to enjoy etc.


    My PCP is wonderful...he is a close family friend and I know that he would not steer me wrong. He has followed me since my first back injury and for the most part manages my pain. This time I was on Percocet which helped wonderfully and I am now on the Feldene which is holding my pain down to a level 2-3. I am also going to PT. The thing that discourages me is that this is the first time that I must be on meds in order to keep the pain down. Before I only put myself on them on & off as needed. Now if I miss a dose I am back to major pain and on the ice. I go to PT 2-3 times a week. I do heat there and ice at home. Personally I find the ice works much better. Heat use to do it but with the nerve involvement ice seems to work so much better. I find that since I started PT my pain is more manageable as well. Has your doctor suggested Physical Therapy??? The exercises help me out alot to keep pain down as well.

    Injections.....I have read on other threads about them and for the most part ther are mixed reviews. Personally, from what I read I wouldn't entertain having them unless it were a last resort. For now I am happy with the way I am managed....I can walk and am getting back to activities of daily living. I just have to take my Feldene and take it easy not overdoing things spacing my errands to limit walking so as not to be back on ice again.

    I am so sorry to hear that you have fibro as well. I often read posts from others who have fibro as well as DDD and from what I understand the pain is so much more involved.

    I hope that the injections work for you....please come back here and let me know how things go....and Judy, my little niece was just recently diagnosed wiht dyslexia. If you hadn't mentioned it I would have never known. I am glad you stopped in here. Please feel free to share how you are progressing. I often talk about other things here to keep my mind off of the pain and you are welcome to join in as well.

    Smiles and (((HUGS))) ~ Goody

     
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