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    Old 02-04-2007, 05:24 AM   #1
    callmemisty
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    In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    [II][/I]I had a discectomy three years ago whereupon they removed two discs which helped for a month or two then the pain started again.I had another MRI scan and my specialist told me i needed a lower back fusion,after reading about fusions i decided against it.I was sent to the pain clinic and prescribed morphine and valium,they helped at first but now three years on i am taking 120mg morphine a day and 15mg valium,i cant sleep as i am so used to morphine so they prescribed Zopiclone which does not work either.I have had Oxycodone,steroid injections and numerous other treatments,none of which work.I am lying in bed again and am getting so that life seems pointless,i have 4 children..21,16,12 and 5 and cant do anything with them as most things aggravate my back.My hips and my knees are now also suffering,please i just want someone to talk to who understands before its too late.

     
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    Old 02-04-2007, 07:17 AM   #2
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    Hello Misty - Sorry to read that you have been in so much pain. I know what it is like to have back pain take over your life. I was very limited in what I could do with my boys ( age 6 & 9 ). About two months ago I have a fusion of L4- S1 with 3 disks replaced. I am now starting to feel much better that pre surgery. It is not a fun surgery at all! Alot of healing before you get better. I have DDD, senosis, & scoliosis. You are not alone in the world of back pain. Their are alot of us on these boards who understand in what you are going through. Please let us know how you are doing! Sending you a big cyber hug and a smile .

    Rose

     
    Old 02-04-2007, 07:17 AM   #3
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    Welcome to our forum, We are not new to the trials of back pain. You have came to the right place. Everyone on this board has either been through surgery or going to have surgery or like yourself weighing the odds. Surgery should be the last resort however quality of life is the most important thing to anyone. As you read the posts you will find that everyone is different but the back pain has limited their life in one way or another. There has been some successfull fusion stories and some not so successful. How ever I bet everyone is glad they tried to do something because their quality of life improved somewhat.

    I am so sorry you are limited and in pain and it is no fun living on pain meds. Sometimes making the decision for the next move is always the hardest. I know I just wished I could wake up one morning and everything would be ok and I would have no pain. That is not reality but it would have been nice for it to happen. I was in denial for a long time. I had back problems for about 15 years and last year it went chronic and I mean I have not had a pain free day in a year. I am on narcotics and muscle relaxers and even have problems opening doors at stores. My life has so changed and I decided that I would get strong and fight back and do what is necessary to stay mobile. This has to be the hardest thing that I and I am sure most everyone on this board has gone thru. Remember that Depression can also accompany chronic pain. I urge you to take a fresh look at your situation and get all the facts and see what might be new to the field to help you. Do research on your issues and Dr. Find a great ortho or neuro that will listen to you and give you all the facts. Life is too short to just let it pass us by. Even if we are limited we still have life to live and I am sure everyone here will agree with me that it is well worth the stress to get that quality of life back

    Good luck and stay in touch with us. Everyone here is the best at supporting each other and we have found great friendship

    Sorry if this is intense but I just feel strongly about quality of life and you so much deserve to have a great life with your children and participate in their lives.

     
    Old 02-04-2007, 07:41 AM   #4
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    perhaps its time to consider fusion. I held out for two years and tried every non surgical procedure before I reached the point where my quality of life was about zero.

    a good doc will give you honest odds on the results of a fusion. with my double fusion the doc gave me the following odds.. 60% better, 30% no change or a different pain, 10% worse. I took those odds and 7 months out of surgery I feel sooo much better that even with some residual pain here and there Im very glad I did it.

    only you can decide but if it looks certain that you will not get any better you might want to reconsider.

    remember many people here are the people whose surgery didnt take or who have multiple issues. most who have had good outcomes tend to drift off like I have lately, i dont come here anywhere as much as I did before and immediately after surgery. now that Im slowly getting my life back I have less time to spend here although I try to just so people can see that there are sucesful fusions.
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    Old 02-04-2007, 07:46 AM   #5
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    Zeroman
    Thank you so much for coming back to share your stories. I know that if I was getting better I would move on also but it helps to here success stories such as yours. Thanks again for your imput

     
    Old 02-04-2007, 08:03 AM   #6
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    Hi, and welcome to the group. You will find so much support and folks in the same or similar situation as yourself. It is always comforting to talk with folks who are going through the same misery, pain, and surgical procedures such as yourself.
    I have just read your post, and hopefully can add something positive for you. First of all chronic pain, can make the most positive thinkers depressed. Narcotics are also a depressants to the mind. Perhaps, you should have done the fusion - but that it is in the past. You still have a future and your kids need their mom. I did my surgery - a Micro-d as an emergency, as my leg strength was almost to the level of an invalid, and I was in horrible pain. I am now trying to recover the quality of life I once had. Yeah, its tough, as the surgery didn't work out exactly as I thought it would. Please don't despair and give up. Life is to precious and short. You can have your life back, perhaps, not the way it was - but you have to take that chance. Find yourself a good neurosurgeon, and tell him/her all your anxieties. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Once you make up your mind to do the surgery, and found out all that you think you need to know - then let go. The wonderful caring folks on this board are always ready to give you hope and a big cyber (((hug))). A lot of us are up in the middle of the night - because of pain issues and so forth. So there is always a new post to read or someone reaching out to some other desperate soul. Don't give up. Stay in touch and let us know how you are doing.
    Peace, prayers and healing Kay

     
    Old 02-04-2007, 08:06 AM   #7
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    clover60, I know I needed to see the occasional posts telling of good outcomes when I was considering fusion, if you read here you might get the impression that most fusions are failures whereas the truth is the opposite really.. but as the successful fusion patients get on with their lives it tends to leave the failed fusion people here in more numbers than the successful ones.

    it is good to hear all sides though, fusions are major surgeries and once its done there is no turning back. things dont always work and as you can see from the many people here who have had less than desirable results and other complications, a failed fusion or even a good fusion that dosent relieve the pain is not good at all.

    callmemisty, you definitely need to go into a fusion with both eyes open and armed with all the info, good and bad, that you can find. this forum is ideal for that, just remember the ratio of successful to failed fusions is much higher than you might gleen from reading here until you realize that most people who had the successful results have moved on and dont post anymore.
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    Last edited by zeroman; 02-04-2007 at 08:10 AM.

     
    Old 02-04-2007, 09:00 AM   #8
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    I have been fighting the back problems for years to. I was able to work with pain meds until finally I couldn't do that anymore. I fought it as long as I could. And maybe that is where you are at now. When it gets to the point where it affecting your quality of life so much, thats when most of us finally give in. I have talked to alot of people who have great sucess with fusion.

    I am scheduled myself on feb 22nd. - I finally gave in. Here is how my surgeon put it to me. You can live like this the rest of your life, and live on pain meds which will quit working, and you will need to keep increasing them or change them (sound familiar) or you can try the fusion. He gave it 70 percent chance. He said I could be eventually pain free, or may still need pain meds. But the odds seem to be in my favor.

    I figure it is my only hope of not staying like this. So I am going to take it.

    I became really depressed a few months ago myself. My surgeon told me that chronic pain actually causes depression. I have been on the cymbalta and I am feeling better, although scared about surgery, not depressed.

     
    Old 02-04-2007, 09:07 AM   #9
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    My Dr gave me a 50-50 chance for the stabilization surgery but where I am at in my life that is worth the chance. Also if it does not go well I can then have the fusion.

    I believe it just depends on where you are in life and how much your life is effected.

    Get the facts and make an educated decision and remember everyone on this board has or is going thru something similar and there is lots of support here

    Good Luck

     
    Old 02-04-2007, 05:24 PM   #10
    mamakitkat
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    [COLOR="RoyalBlue"]Hi Callmemisty,
    I'm so sorry you suffering so, I understand your feelings so well. I have had 4 fusion surgeries in the last 3yrs. I am much better than I was before any, I'm not back to normal because I was misdiagnosed for many yrs before the right diagnosis in 2003 so now i have perm. nerve damage and could not be "fixed" but I am secured so no further damage can be done.

    It is a hard recovery from a fusion, but the rewards are tremendous. I know you see alot of posts on here that are not successful, that is not the norm! Way over 85% of fusions are successful and those people return to normal or near normal lives after recovery. Don't make yourself suffer by not having it, like I said I'm not normal, but I do many things with family. They may have had to adjust to doing them a bit slower but why rush thru life, hehe.

    Again I'm so sorry that your in such shape, I hope you find the answers you need here or at least the understanding.

    Good Luck

    God Bless

    Carol[/COLOR]
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    Old 02-05-2007, 10:46 AM   #11
    callmemisty
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    Hi
    I just want to send a big thank you to the people that have answered my post.I Cant believe in only joining yesterday how warm,caring and compassionate people can be,your helpful advice and to know that i am not on my own lifted my spirits and has given me some hope.I wished i had found this site along time ago.....but better late than never!I think i have found my lifeline.
    So once again my heartfelt thanks and hope we can speak soon xxxxxxxx

     
    Old 02-05-2007, 11:31 AM   #12
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    I'm in the exact same boat!!! Unfortunately. I have been dealing with back pain... FOREVER!! I'm only 33 and have had a micro-d in May 06. I am being told I need a fusion due to my constant recurrent painful episodes where I can barely function. It basically started when I was 12 when I had a fall in gymnastics and it's been downhill since. I'm going for ESI's and we'll see if they help. I know this is short term because no pain med and possibly injections is going to cure my back, just make the time stretch out before I actually have to go ahead with the fusion. It's all about, at least for me, how much longer I can deal with it. But, like most say... It's quality of life that matters!!! Good luck with your decision. You are not alone!!!
    ~Melissa

     
    Old 02-05-2007, 09:40 PM   #13
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    Hi Callmemisty, Welcome!!! I dont blame you for not wanting surgery. I dont think any of us on here wanted surgery and did our utmost to avoid it also.

    But there comes a time when all avenues become exhausted and we get to that crossroad of do we sit and let life just carry on in misery and pain or do we take a leap of faith and have surgery to possibly rid of the horrible pain.

    I was only given a 50/50 chance of ridding me of my pain. That's a lot less odds then some get. I took the chance because my life as I was.. it wasn't life. It was horrific pain 24/7 and I needed to try and get some of my life back if I could.

    I thought long and hard, armed myself with knowledge,and made the choice.

    I have no regrets from my fusion surgery. None! I am 100% solidly fused. I am still healing from the surgery though.. it's obvious as I am still getting better and better as time goes on. I feel I am already a success story even though I am not pain free. But I often am pain free and other days are better than others. All to be expected.

    You will know if it's time or not. Only you can make that choice. Welcome.. you have found a wonderful site with lot of us on here that understand what you are going through. Take care and keep coming back. Tammy
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    A Success, but still improving!

     
    Old 02-05-2007, 10:08 PM   #14
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    [COLOR="RoyalBlue"]HI,
    I"m so glad your getting help here, there are very caring members here that have been my lifeline many many times, hope to see around for a long time to come.

    Hey Tammy, So glad to hear your still doing well!!! I'm still waiting for PM dr. appt on 3/1, it seems like yrs away. I'm also very nervous that it's not gonna be the answer I"m needing to control pain. We'll see I guess, anyway just wanted to say hey!!!

    God Bless

    Carol[/COLOR]
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    Old 03-04-2007, 08:09 AM   #15
    callmemisty
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    Re: In Pain And Desperate>>>>

    Hi All
    well back very bad again,i have not been out of bed for 9 days now!does anyone else end up in bed for this long?and if you are on morphine would you share your experiences with me...it just gets harder and harder and no appointment with pain specialist untl May!!!!!!!!
    Take care all
    Bev

     
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