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Originally Posted by daisy-duke77 Thank you for the responses. I feel so lost..............when i moved i picked therapists out of the phone book...........then i got a referral from my family dr on this last one! I know you have to keep trying different therapists/drugs.....and it's all trial and error! More than anything i want to feel "normal" i have never felt whatever that is my entire life! I have such a TRUST issue and as far as med's i am petrified! As the therapists always told me............do you want to feel better mentally? Or gain a little weight/good sex life. Well if i put on any weight...........i go mental!!! I wont quit smoking......for fear of gaining weight! I quit for 6 months and that was 6 months of pure hell..............along with weight gain. Yesterday im at the gym............i got a compliment............WOW, i couldnt believe it! It made me feel good for about 1/2 the day. It's bizaar how other's see you? This woman asked me if i compete (bodybuilding competitions) i think i looked at her with a blank stare. She said i looked great and she wanted to look like me! Well i thought inside my head..............."Oh i starve myself and take Efedra...............to look like this. I just dont know where to begin........i need to trust a therapist. This one is hard..............my husband doesnt believe in them...........and think they are "just regular people" who have had some education..........and that misdiagnose people all the time and "jack" them up on meds! He believe's they are a waste of $$$$$! He tells me EVERYONE feels like i do.............to some extent, but i take it over the top! We sit and talk about how i feel and yes he would support me finding help again...............do you see where im coming from? |
Sounds like maybe there is more than bipolar going on. There are eating disorder issues present as well, and maybe even some social anxiety? That is something you really need to talk to a therapist about. You said you want feedback from your therapist...but maybe they don't know that. Some people want their therapists to just listen, and some want feedback. I always wanted that too, but gave up before I found it. I am currently looking for a new therapist. It is important to find one you are comfortable with, because they do have different styles. Keep trying - make sure they know you're looking for feedback. A lot of your symptoms do sound like bipolar, but maybe it's not a complete diagnosis.
It is very very hard to find the right meds. I never did, and got fed up and quit taking them. Now, i've been off them for a year and been okay, but not great. I am looking for a new psychiatrist too, because I do feel that mine was too medication-happy. If any of your docs are uncooperative, look for a new one. A trusting relationship must go both ways.
Your husband is right, in a sense about therapists - they are just regular people! They aren't superheros, and i supposed they can make mistakes, like other human beings, but there are some really good therapists out there - you just have to find them! "Therapists" can't give out meds though - to give out meds you have to be a doctor (or a psychiatrist). Doctors are just regular people too....with education. Medical doctors aren't perfect either, and sometimes misdiagnose. That's why some people get second opinions.
We're all just human.
Therapists aren't a waste of money, if they are helping you. And no, not everyone feels like you do - your husband is wrong about that. Yes, many people get depressed at some point or have mood swings, but it's the duration and severity (or reoccurance) of symptoms that makes it a "mental illness".
