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Self pity mode

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Old 12-07-2006, 12:49 PM   #1
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Dannyk HB User
Self pity mode

Is there anyone else who gets into this self pity, poor me mode? When I get depressed I seem to automatically go into that mode of thinking. I try to not do that but it almost seems automatic. I think it makes my depression even worse.

What I think is poor old me. Full of mental illness and I need everyone to feel sorry for me. I know that's an imature way to be but I don't know how to stop it. Any ideas?


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Old 12-07-2006, 01:41 PM   #2
Join Date: Jan 2006
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Spanophile HB User
Re: Self pity mode

I definitely get that way. "Feeling Good" by Dr. Burns is a good book to read. It teaches you how to develop more positive thinking habits. My old therapist gave it to me. There's a book and also it comes in the form of a workbook. I have the workbook and cannot motivate myself to do the activities. There is a lot of good stuff in it but don't they understand that when you're depressed it takes a full scale effort to actually attempt to read a book much less complete exercises?!

Old 12-07-2006, 05:28 PM   #3
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makeworldgoaway HB User
Re: Self pity mode

I think I'm 1/2 self-pity and 1/2 guilt ridden (I must deserve this pain) when I'm depressed. I don't know how to stop it, if I did I don't think I'd get depressed! It's like when I start thinking about possible horrible confrontational scenarios with whatever or whoever is in my life, I play it out in my head and then get as upset as if it had really happened. Then I try to tell myself that but I'm still upset. I am trying to stop doing that but it's like passing a car accident and trying not to look...
We dance around a ring and suppose but the secret sits in the middle and knows. -Robert Frost

Old 12-08-2006, 12:21 AM   #4
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munchie11 HB User
Re: Self pity mode

Hello DannyK

I don't think I can really say anything to help. But I am currentley in that mode. I think I snap out of it though when I see someone who is doing far worse than me and then I feel really guilty and selfish for feeling that way and try to concentrate on all the good in my life and realize how lucky I really am.

Thanx Muchie

Last edited by munchie11; 12-08-2006 at 12:39 AM.

Old 12-09-2006, 12:42 AM   #5
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miss_pelld HB User
Re: Self pity mode

just wanted to say that I get into tha mode too.. the whole shebang... i get in the half/half mode, the poor me mode and the I probably deserveit mode... not all at the same time, but it is usually one of them.

I have tried to stop it too as I am also aware and am sick of feeling this way because it can cause problems for my relationship especially when my partner is in a manic state, which will leave me insecure and down all in one go.

I dont know.. actually I cant think straight at the moment, so I better leave my ranting as is for now.


Old 12-09-2006, 02:29 AM   #6
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isitme HB Userisitme HB User
Re: Self pity mode

Another POM here - poor old me!
I certainly am trying to change it, the way I think. It doesn't come easy, but as others have written, there are millions of people worse off than ourselves. I just have to try to remember that! Stay positive.

Old 12-10-2006, 12:08 AM   #7
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blauermonday HB User
Re: Self pity mode

And another POM! My counselor (gently) accused/pointed out my having a pity party this week, and I have been trying to fight it by practicing gratefulness. As small as I have to start, whatever, as long as I am trying, like when I am thankful no one broke into my apartment each time I return. It helps a little, sometiems a lot, changing the road my mind is driving along.

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