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Entry #3

Posted 12-02-2011 12:03 AM by Beeze
Updated 12-02-2011 01:47 AM by Administrator

Miserable ((

I'm terribly bloated, and trying to write a 9 page paper... it's 10:52 pm and I hate to admit it but all I want to do is eat something. My boyfriend called into work tonight though because he is sick. So he's sleeping next to me as I write this and try not to think about how uncomfortable I am right now.
I feel like crying.
I feel like I'm huge and I just can't stop thinking about what i ate today and how it's litterally been months since I have done any form of exercise.
I feel like pulling out my hair.

Why oh why do I procrasinate??? It just adds to my stress levels and puts me in situations like this!

It's weird my stomach is literally so bloated I look like i'm 6 months pregnant yet I can still feel a grumble of hunger.

I'm also running on about 12 hours of sleep through out the past 3 nights from all the homework I have had.

Seeing as I have so much to do I probably shouldn't be on here...


On one hand I'm so thankful he is here.
Yet on the other hand my eating disorder is screaming at me. It's telling me how fat I'm going to be tmrw.
And how disgusting I will be at the work christmas party.
and how I can't wear that dress.
and how I can't eat anything tmrw.
and how big of a failure i am.


I'm ready for winter break.

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