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My mum is 80 and has lung cancer

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Old 06-12-2009, 06:02 AM   #1
Join Date: Jun 2009
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parry HB User
My mum is 80 and has lung cancer

It all happened today. Mum has had a month of xrays and tests and we found out that mum has Stage 1B lung cancer. She is nearly 80. Dad had a stroke 5 years ago and mum has being the primary carer. She now weighs only 42 kg. An operation is out of the question and radiotherapy is all she can physically deal with. We were told today if mum does nothing she has 12-18 months, with radiotherapy maybe up to 5 years, but unlikely. Dad sort of understands, but not really, and for mum to be able to deal with her future and what is happening to her, it means we need to find a nursing home close to home for dad. How do people deal with this when you love your parents so much? This is all about about mum and dad. How can we the right thing so they feel secure, loved and at the same time keep dignity?

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Old 06-16-2009, 01:31 PM   #2
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Abigail121 HB User
Re: My mum is 80 and has lung cancer

It's a tough decision to make, but if you follow your heart you will make the right one. Take her feelings into consideration- call around for references to different care facilities. Assure her you will make sure she is well taken care of. Hang in there, this is the beginning of a tough journey for you and your family, but you will pull through knowing you did everything you could to make your mum's end-of-life experiences as comfortable as you could.

Old 06-17-2009, 07:08 AM   #3
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Re: My mum is 80 and has lung cancer

It's because you love them that you will do what is right for them. I hated that we had to put my grandmother in a NH. Hated it. But there was no choice considering her condition and who was available to care for her. It was the best thing for HER. Sometimes we have trouble doing what we have to do because it is painful for us - but that's not relevant. It is what is best for them and the overall situation. Nothing is perfect. But you'll know that you did what was best. Take comfort in that.

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