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Garlin64 09-23-2011 03:52 AM

How long for my Dad?
Could any one help?

My Dad has Lung Cancer that has spread to his Liver, Spleen, around his heart and now the Drs have found a tumor in his brain! I am so confused some days my Dad is fantasic and others very sleepy and very moody. The cancer has and is spreading so fast and I just don't know what is next :confused: If anyone can give me some advice on how to deal with this it would be great! :(

Joeygirl1104 09-23-2011 12:49 PM

Re: How long for my Dad?
My dad was just diagnosed with lung cancer today. We go Monday for a PET to see if it has spread. Good Luck to you and your dad!

loveourdad 09-27-2011 12:39 PM

Re: How long for my Dad?
Garlin64 I am so sorry to hear about this for your dad. I am trying to cope as my dad has been fighting with small cell lung cancer which has moved to his liver I am sorry to hear that his has spread to so many other places. It is so hard and I have been so angry to have to accept this. I do wish you the best for your dad and your family overall. This is so hard on a family and just remember to be there for each other thru this hard time

JanaJ 09-27-2011 12:45 PM

Re: How long for my Dad?
My sister died from mouth cancer last year. I saw her nearly every day during the last few weeks, and I'll never regret that time I spent with her.

Just be there for your dad, as much as you can.

I'm really sorry, he sounds really poorly but his suffering will soon be ended.

My heart goes out to you, it's awful seeing someone dying in front of you.

Make sure you go for bereavement counselling, when you feel ready.

Lots of love

reachout 09-27-2011 01:02 PM

Re: How long for my Dad?
Hello Garlin

I am so sorry for your pain and hurt. I sympathize with you having stood in your shoes some years ago.

When my Pop was diagnosed, the cancer had already spread to his brain and bones. It was pretty shocking as my Mom had been diagnosed a week earlier. To just round it off, one week after my Dad was diagnosed, my uncle was diagnosed with lung cancer. I felt like I had been hit with a truck.

My Dad was diagnosed the second week in September and passed away 6 months later in February. In painful irony, my uncle passed away 1 hour after my Dad. My Mom is a survivor.

Although it was a time of hurt and sorrow, those last months with my Pop also hold a lot of happy memories. He had ended up in a nursing home after brain surgery to relieve pressure left him paralyzed on the right side. I got him some small hand held games. He especially like the poker one. Whenever he got a really good hand, he would leave it for me to see. Then I would try to beat it. If he fell asleep while I was trying, I would leave it for him to see. Silly little goal, but it gave him something to try and accomplish each day. We would also sit and watch TV together. He liked Jeopardy because he was still able to think and he liked the challenge. We even joked around sometimes. I would climb up on the bed and say, "Okay. Old Man, time for a massage." I would push him to a sitting position and hold him up with my knees and then give him a back rub. It is a poignant and sweet memory.

He was losing the ability to walk once the cancer hit his brain. After the surgery, of course, the paralyzed side, really made it impossible. However, he was given Physical therapy on bars and helped along. I would move right along those bars with him and encourage him.

I guess what I would tell you is to be grateful for time with him now. Keep it easy and relaxed. Let him know you love him and don't be hesitant to show affection. His time here is most likely very limited at this point. Share your memories with him now, make some new ones for both of you to carry forward.


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