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To much stress with cancer on top!

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Old 06-07-2011, 08:26 PM   #1
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Unhappy To much stress with cancer on top!

I'm 27. I was diagnosed in 2009 with Adenocarcinoma. I am trying to live as normal a life as I as I did before the diagnoses. Yet in the past few months my life has been turned upside down. I mother had to leave her home of 18 years because of finance problems and is now living with my new husband and I. My boss finds every reason to try to get me fired. (I still work full time). I have my "cancer days" when I throwing up everything and my whole body hurts. My boss has decided that I'm making up my illness!!! And on top of that my best friend of 16 years has decided that the way is going to deal with all the drama in her meth. One overdose later, she swears she wasn't trying to kill herself. Now I'm the one in tears, wondering what I can do to fix every one as if I don't have enough to worry about. There are many other things but those were the icing on the cake. I know life is never what we thought it was going to be. But it is so hard being the rock for every one else and not having one of my own. I love my husband but he is a US Marine, and just has shoulder surgery. I don't want to pour all this on him. But this is when I need him the most. Help! I'm tried of crying myself to sleep.

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Old 06-07-2011, 09:10 PM   #2
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Re: To much stress with cancer on top!

Oh dear- you have so much weight to carry on your young shoulders! I don't know or understand what your particular kind of cancer is- or how it affects you, but I do know that this stress isn't doing you any good!

Can you get your Doctor/Oncologist to write down the nature of your illness for your boss to see? He must believe it when it is coming from a professional person who is caring for you.

Can you talk to your Mum & let her be your rock to lean on? I know she has her financial worries but I'm sure she is concerned for your health & happiness. She may not realise how you really feel.

It must be hard with your husband away so much.... Does he get leave to come back & see you?

As for your friend, I think you have to explain to her that though you will always be her friend, you have an obligation to look after yourself first or you will be in no condition to help her. She needs some advice from a professional I would say.

It isn't right that are so unhappy at your age & I really hope things improve for you!

Old 06-07-2011, 09:29 PM   #3
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Re: To much stress with cancer on top!

Thanks. My hubby is home with me. The one thing the cancer did for me that was good, was stopping the Marine Corp from sending him to Afghanistan. He is able to take care me. But mentally he doesn't know what I'm going through. I don't want to stress him out. My mom has so much on her plate, I feel the same way about stressing her out. It's so hard.

Old 06-09-2011, 12:48 AM   #4
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Question To much stress with cancer on top!

So earlier today I had to go on a field trip with my 7 year old niece and her 1st grade class to Sea World. That trip gave me a life time of birth control! My niece (as much as I love her) was so very possessive over me. she didn't want her friends holding my hand or God forbid I pay them any attention. Wow, it was an eye opener. Then to top it all off, my darling niece decides that I am going to carry her! And there is no telling her, NO. That is a bad word to her. She starts to cry and says I love her friends more than I love her. So I give in, as always. Yet I can't go 100 feet without my lungs burning. I put her down and try to explain that Auntie is ill. And that I have mean bad things in lungs that make it hard for me to breath. Now, she sort of understood. But, that experience make me wonder at what age do I tell her that I have cancer???? Her brother (8) found out when he over heard their mom (my sister) and our father talking about it. My nephew was devastated and starting crying, saying that I was going to die and it wasn't fair. Their step father passed away from stomach cancer not to long ago. So cancer to them is already scary to them at their young age. But at what age should they find out? And is she going to be mad that we kept it from her??? Will she hate her brother for keeping it a secret?? What do you think?


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