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Dementia - please help

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Old 12-31-2015, 12:47 AM   #1
Join Date: Dec 2015
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Loyalty64 HB User
Dementia - please help

My mom is in the early stages of dementia, she is only 69. But, things are progressing pretty rapidly as she has become increasingly forgetful. For some reason, it makes me very angry when she asks me the same things over and over again in the same conversation and I remain patient but Im so upset and frustrated. And then I end up feeling so awful as a daughter that Im upset that she can not remember. Its not her fault and I am not sure why I am
So upset on the inside when our interactions show she can not remember just basic things. Its not within her control, and I feel so bad that it makes me angry even though I do not show it to her. Has anyone ever experienced this sort of internal reaction in the early stages of this disease with their loved ones?

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Old 12-31-2015, 06:43 PM   #2
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Re: Dementia - please help

Welcome to the club...a club we children of parents with dementia wish we didn't belong to!

At least you are able to not show the anger in front of your mom. Many people are so frustrated that the anger occurs in front of the parent or directed at the parent.

What you are feeling is very normal for many reasons. You are probably in denial, wanting this to not be happening. Plus, it is tiring and frustrating to be asked the same thing for the tenth time in fifteen minutes! I remember I would start out nicely, talkatively, answering answers would get more brief as the same question was asked again and again.

Have you had a work-up done to be sure she is really dealing with dementia rather than a physical problem, vitamin deficiency, etc?

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Old 01-02-2016, 03:22 PM   #3
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meem68 HB User
Re: Dementia - please help

Hi my husband is in late stages of dementia,and my daughter and i nursed my husband with no outside help,he was double incontinent repeated everything a few times i lost my temper many a time i would try to get my husband to sit on the toilet as he was making a mess he kept standing up i started sit down quietly sit down by the end of sit down i was shouting it,my husband would reply yes ok but did not do it.All you have to remember is this is a cruel disease it is not their fault just try to stay calm,and say i know you have told me that.try music she likes it does have a calming affect,have a word to your doctor try to go to the dementia cafe's,read up on it amazon do a lot of books explain a lot.i joined the dementia group on ******** they give a lot of advice this disease is so crippling not only for the one that has it but the person looking after the person with dementia take care.x

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