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Old 10-04-2006, 02:39 PM   #1
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Boise, Idaho
Posts: 159
rhales199 HB User
new to board, but not new to caregiving

Howdy! My name is becky. My hubby, Ty, and I have been married 8 years. He was born with a developmental disability called cerebral palsy. He also has asthma.
His CP affects him in a variety of ways. It makes it so the muscles in his eyes don't work properly, therefore he is legally blind. It affects his speech a little bit. It affects his balance, and walking endurance and speed. Because of that, he often uses a wheelchair to get around. One thing that it does not affect is his mind. he is one of the brightest, most intelligent people I have ever known.
When we were first married, he asked me if I wanted to help him (with things like personal care, ect) or if he should keep having his aid come. At the time, i said 'keep having your aide come'.
Well, after one 1 1/2 mo illness and one state to state move, and then having to deal with new aides, I changed my mind. I became a CNA with the main goal in mind that then I could be his aide, only to fin out that 'medicade doesn't allow spouses to take care of their spouse and get paid for it' (But I have since found out about what here is called Certified Family Home, which I hope will allow me to do this). Meanwhile, I started doing in-home care for other disabled and/or elderly people. I have been doing that for most of the last five years, as well as trying to take care of hubby and keep up with the housework that the aides weren't able to do.
Most days I can handle it all, but some times things start to get to me. That's when I make sure to do something for myself, even if it's only a ten minute walk around our apt. complex.
One of the times that was the hardest was when I was working as a cashier 40 hrs/ wk (this was before I became a CNA), including Saturdays, and would often notget home till 6 or 7:30 at night, and would be dead tired from work, but I still had to fix dinner (and wanted to be home for a while), and more often than not my hubby would want to go out because he was going stir crazy. At that time, the only person he got to talk to during the day pretty much was his aide, and even so, they weren't there the whole day. It certainly didn't help that our neighbors knew about this (because I told them, and told them, and told them...) and yet could never manage to visit or call.

well, I thnk that's a pretty good introduction.
i'll talk to y'all later

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