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what do you like most and dislike most about beign a caregiver?

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Old 10-24-2006, 09:22 AM   #1
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Boise, Idaho
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rhales199 HB User
what do you like most and dislike most about beign a caregiver?

The things that i like the most are that i am doing it for someone that i care about and want to see have the best life possible. ( I take care of my hubby, who was born with his disability, and when he's not sick, he can do a lot of the same things as able bodied people, he just needs someone (me) to drive him where he wants to go, and to get his wheelchair out of the vehicle for him. After that, he can do a lot on his own).

The things that i dislike the most are: when i'm sick and still ahve to do things for him, when i've just gotten in bed and realize that i didn't get his cough medicine ready for him (he is taking it at night, so he can sleep instead of coughing all night), so of course i have to get back up and get it ready for him because he can't do it himself (can't open the bottle or pour very easily). When he wakes me in the middle of the night to say he needs to go to the ER. Thankfully this one has only happened a couple of times, but i really dislike when it happens because we always end up being in the hosp. at least 4 hours, and I like my sleep!!!

Now, it's your turn!!!

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Old 11-18-2006, 01:23 PM   #2
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: venus
Posts: 86
aliasnewname HB User
Re: what do you like most and dislike most about beign a caregiver?

I am the only caregiver for my 82-yr old Mom, who has non-tobacco emphysema (oxygen 24/7), osteoporosis, arthritis, and memory loss. I'd have help but the rest of our family is deceased, and she is still mobile enough to ban any outside help. What I like is the opportunity to help her; had I moved away I may not have been able to move back in time. But we've always lived nearby. I enjoy hearing her laugh, driving her to our favorite places to eat, and seeing any improvement (at this stage if she's still breathing I'm grateful).
I don't like not being able to do much more than make her comfortable and distract her from the inevitable; although she was put on an anti-anxiety med (buspar), she still blows off quite a bit of steam when she forgets names, events, etc, and then her lungs tighten up from self-induced stress. This worries the heck out of me. At first I hated the fact that I was the only caregiver, but after watching the arguing that goes on between other families' siblings, caregivers, etc, I am grateful for at least that much peace. The stress of family arguments would not do her any good. I am also grateful to have a friend of 43 years whose Mother has been my Mother's best friend also for 43 years. They have a large, nice, highly-functional family who always invite us to Christmas dinner. Once a month we get together for lunch, but Mom's friend is in a nursing home and cannot communicate well; this scares my Mom. But I'm happy they still see each other. I'm also grateful for the opportunity to learn new skills so I have more job opportunities than retail sales (yecch) after I re-enter the paid work force.
Friends are God's way of apologising for relatives

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