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any one have those days when ....

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Old 07-02-2010, 01:49 PM   #1
Join Date: Jul 2010
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tw2121 HB User
any one have those days when ....

you want to scream or pull all your hair out? I feel bad about it but seriously....sometimes she drives me nuts. I am taking care of her, my three year old and I am 6 and a half months pregnant. I am so tired of it sometimes. She can be so demanding. I feel bad about complaining because I really care about her. I suppose it is probably my pregnancy hormones making me moody. Every once in a while she gets something in her head she wants to do and she will not quit talking or obsessing about it until I just do it. I feel like a maid today. I am just tired of it sometimes I guess. I have days like this and then the next day is fine so I just gatta get through today and hope tomarrow is better.

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Old 08-09-2010, 06:03 PM   #2
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: New Jersey
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jostlrs26 HB User
Re: any one have those days when ....

You are sooooooo not alone. I take care of my 92 yr old Aunt who is usually adorable and loving. But sometimes I feel the same thoughts make me feel guilty/selfish..I mean she is the one that may not be around much longer...I am generally an emotional person to begin with and it is so hard for me not to take things she says personally; even though I know the meds she is on probably have her confused, agitated, etc. It is frustrating and I really don't think anyone else understands unless they deal with it every day. People tell me to "take a break" "do something for myself"..but it is hard for me to enjoy anything lately. I guess I just wanted to let you know your feelings are normal - I am not even pregnant!!! =)
If you need to talk I am here...take care.

Last edited by jostlrs26; 08-09-2010 at 06:04 PM.

Old 08-18-2010, 05:44 PM   #3
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Re: any one have those days when ....

Your daughter is only a 3 year old, it is natural for her to want your undivided attention and when she does not get it she will keep on and on. She does not realize you have other things on your mind.

Try to make special time with your daughter, love, cuddle her and see if it will make a difference. Take afternoon naps with her or whatever to be close to her. She will have your attention and you will get a little rest.

She is noticing that something is not like it use to be, maybe you are focusing a lot of time on your pregnancy and she feels left out.

Work on connection and bonding with your 3 year old, it will pay off down the road, otherwise she will become a demanding child on into her teens and later.

Age 3 is a precious age.

Mother of 5

Old 08-19-2010, 06:40 AM   #4
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Location: Australia
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coggles HB User
Re: any one have those days when ....

I have way too many of those days. I have been looking after my Mum, who is in a wheelchair, for about 20 years, and haven't had a vacation in all that time. I get one afternoon a week when a sitter stays with her and I get to go out and do things for myself.
But I've been reading a great book lately, called The Selfish Pig's Guide to Caring, and I highly recommend it to everyone in the same situation. One thing he points out - which helps us all feel like we're normal people and not freaks - is that all caregivers feel guilty about wanting time to themselves. We tend to forget that we're important too, and then start to think we're selfish for wanting to do things for us.
It's SO important to make time regularly to do something we want to do, or something that makes us feel better about ourselves. Even if it's just an hour a day, or half a day a week. Go get your hair done, or phone a friend (not that many of them stay around when you're a caregiver, sigh) or buy a new nail polish, or have a bubble bath, or play at the children's playground, see a movie, have a massage - whatever makes you happy MUST be included in your life, otherwise we just become robots.
It's so much easier to cope with the regimented routine of caregiving when you have something to look forward to, even if it's just something most people who aren't caregivers would take for granted.

Old 08-19-2010, 07:53 PM   #5
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melliann HB User
Re: any one have those days when ....

I'm right there with you right now, but for me it is taking care of my own child, he has 24 different medical problems and we are going to urology and neurology consults down to the Mayo Clinic (which is a lovely - not - 2 hour drive for us). Today I got really bad news, the neurologist lied to me I found out because my son's primary has to write a referral letter for the pediatric neurology office and what was said on the report wasn't said to me otherwise I would have taken it more seriously. I spent the good part of the late afternoon early evening crying about it, just nothing good either way. The thing is he is only 11.

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