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  • Being An Old Caregiver

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    Old 05-08-2014, 10:33 PM   #1
    Dreamscaper
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    Being An Old Caregiver

    Some days are very difficult, being the caregiver of my son with autism. He also has some serious mood disorder, depression, and I find that I have to use all the many techniques and mental strength of which I am capable to deal with him positively. I am getting older, with a myriad of physical pain and limitations, but I am still expected to be the person I was thirty years ago. Today, I was accused of ruining his life, since I have cautioned him about showing up at people's doors uninvited, or without at least calling ahead. He vents his frustration at me, refuses to see a mental health professional (he had gone for more than seven years to one particular expert), and then, like a storm passing and sun shining through, he goes on to something else, is laughing at a program on television, engaged in something else, and I have to collect myself, be loving, productive and compassionate after feeling shredded and burned. . .I can never hold anything against him, since I always must take the "higher ground," but I think that some of my more recent aches and pains have to do with the extremity of living with a person who is like an extreme weather system. I am very much alone with this, since his step-father is disconnected, and in his own ways presents problems as well. When I was younger, I could recover more quickly, but now, a severe exhaustion sets in. I buoy myself up with meditation, energy healing, prayer, and many mindful and Zen-like practices. I wonder if I were a fully enlightened person, this angst and dismay over my son would be as disturbing and all-encompassing. I feel very alone some of the time with this situation, although I know there must be millions of people who are caregivers, suffering in similar ways.

     
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    Old 06-07-2014, 01:21 PM   #2
    MSNik
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    Re: Being An Old Caregiver

    I just wanted to shout out for you for support. I do hope you are going to a support group for parents with autism or caregiver support group. Youre doing an amazing job, but you do have to have plans in place in case you arent able to care for your son, and places like this will help you to cope with all the issues which you are encountering.
    My heart applauds your determination.
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