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    Old 03-27-2008, 01:50 PM   #1
    violetsmom13
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    scary tantrums

    My daughter is two and a half years old and has been having 'scary' tantrums for a week now. I call them scary because she acts like a completely different person. They usually occur after a time-out and spiral out of control. After about an hour, I give up trying to keep her in the time-out chair and let her go to cool off. But she can't cool off and the tantrum turns into a three hour ordeal with her running through the house screaming. I just had a baby seven weeks ago, and there certainly was a difficult transition period. I am so careful to show equal attention to both of them. I had just started thinking that things were going smoothly when these tantrums started. We also have recently gotten rid of the 'binky' which she had still been using to sleep. She did a fabulous job giving it up and going to sleep on her own. She has asthma, but has not had an attack for several months and is not on daily medication. She has always been strong-willed and has always had powerful tantrums, but over the winter months she had started to impress me with how she could be reasoned with and calm herself down. I don't know what to do! My husband travels a lot for work, and I am home alone most of the time. I might lose it if this keeps up another day.

     
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    Old 03-27-2008, 07:23 PM   #2
    mcr285
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    Re: scary tantrums

    a few questions....

    how do you react to her tantrums?

    what is her diet like?

    how does she sleep at night?

    does she still nap during the day?

    when is the last time she took asthma medication?

     
    Old 03-28-2008, 12:17 PM   #3
    violetsmom13
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    Re: scary tantrums

    She has always been a good sleeper. She sleeps 11 hours at night and takes a 1 hour nap almost every day. It used to be a longer nap, but getting rid of the pacifier complicated that. (She naps on the living room couch now.) She's a pretty picky eater, but she loves fruit and a wide variety of vegetables. I probably give her more cookies than she needs, but almost all of her cookies and snacks are organic. I used to yell during her tantrums, but I quickly learned that just fuels the fire. Now I stay calm and neutral. As far as asthma meds go, we gave her Pulmicort over the winter, but only during colds. (Not the typical way to use an inhaled steroid, I understand.) Her last cold was about three weeks ago. She was on prednisone for a few days in October, and that was the last time she had albuterol. Do these facts help you come to any conclusion?

    Last edited by violetsmom13; 03-28-2008 at 12:21 PM.

     
    Old 03-28-2008, 01:57 PM   #4
    AlexaIn2006
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    Re: scary tantrums

    It could be a combination of changes in her life that is making her feel angery. Her father travels often and isn't home and now mom has a new baby. She also recently began giving up her binky too. I would began to yell a few times out of stress when Alexa had a fit and I also realized not only did it not help, but it doesn't look good, nor is it teaching her how to handle herself. I do not give timeouts, but instead I try to enlist Alexa for help in what I am doing, especially if she is cranky or tired or on the verge of a meltdown. Or, I will pick her up and talk to her sweetly, tell her what I am doing or what we need to do and love on her by giving hugs, kisses, or distract her by asking where her nose, etc. is. Another thing I will do if I think she is going to lose it is make her laugh. I will tickle her, pretend like I am a monster or lion and come after her and she will usually laugh her head off regardless of what was going on before. Basically I do give timeouts, but I try to change the mood.

     
    Old 03-28-2008, 08:02 PM   #5
    mcr285
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    Re: scary tantrums

    it's possible she's still not sleeping enough. what's prompted the napping on the couch? my two year old sleeps a good 11-12 hours at night and still needs at least a good two hour nap every day. she's a horrible monster if she doesn't get that nap fairly consistently!

    does she have her two year molars in? if she's cutting those teeth, make sure she gets ibuprofen or teething tablets (i recommend both) at sleep times so she can be comfortable and sleep longer.

    dad being gone a lot and having a new baby can definitely prompt those scary tantrums! my husband is deployed right now and i'm pregnant, and my two year old has really become clingy and wants to be with me ALL the time! and she is a screamer too.... if she doesn't get what she wants, she freaks out! she's always been this way, but it's gotten way worse over the last couple of weeks!!! i just discovered last night that her two back molars have finally broken through, so i think that's what's been making her behavior so much worse lately.

    i think that pulmicort is what turned my oldest child into a little heathen monster (she's usually just the sweetest child you'd ever meet!) and it took her a good solid month to become sweet again. but if your child's behavior just started last week, it's not likely due to the pulmicort. but watch for negative changes in her behavior when you use those medications just in case there could be a correlation.

    and for the dietary question.... something i discovered in my oldest, is that any foods with artificial colors like the reds, blues and yellows, and things with high fructose corn syrup really set her over the edge! she is like jekyl and hyde! sweet as can be on an all natural diet, but the second i let her have something with those ingredients in it, she's a completely different child! very emotional, very short tempered, very MEAN! so i have to really watch labels with her. even things like some juices, and fruit snacks, and children's vitamins, and most medications (i can only give her dye free) are horrible to give her!

    when my two year old starts with her tantrums now, i don't show any emotion at all. i just pick her up, and dump her into her room and shut the door. as i'm closing the door i tell her she can come out whenever she is done. she usually screams a few minutes and then comes out with a tearful apology (it's really quite pitiful!). occasionally she's been known to stay in there for nearly an hour, but i will NOT go get her!!! she has to learn to control herself and so i let her make the choice to come out when she is ready.

    anyway, these are all the ideas i had when i first read your post. hope something here can help!

     
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