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So confused


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Old 10-24-2006, 03:34 PM   #1
x-Bliss-x
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So confused

Hi
I posted here a couple of weeks ago now I think, as I had just had my meds increased (Celexa 10mg to 20mg) and I was having a rough time of it.

Unfortunately I still am, I started a kind of mood chart to see if could see any pattern at all but so far all I can see is that i'm up and down like a yo-yo! I'm going back to my doctor on Friday as he is on holiday at the moment and wondering whether to take it with me and see if it helps at all. I don't want him thinking i'm unstable or anything

I've just been looking over the chart and i'm just all over the place, I started on the 11th as being quite down (avarage: 3/10), then I had a day where I was in a really good mood and got loads of my revision done (av: 7). Back down the next day (av: 3)until the evening where I 'apparently' although don't really remember being happy at the moment, was in a great mood scoring 8-9 (6 being what I would consider my normal mood) and actually lost track of time cleaning at work and stayed 45 mins late . That lasted for 2 and 1/2 days and thought I was finally settling if not a little hyper but after being so depressed recently it felt good to be happy. Until I crashed again for another 4 days (av: 3) then had another 2 good days (av: 8) and now I'm back down again (av: 3)

Sorry it's long I'm just so confused and tired with it all, any support or advise would be greatly appreciated, thanks. I need a hug

x-Bliss-x

 
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Old 10-24-2006, 09:52 PM   #2
trg247
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Re: So confused

How long have you been on Celexa? How long since your upgrade? Your chart is a good idea you might want to put down any triggers, significant events and even the weather (my mood plummets when it is rainy and cloudy). Sorry your feeling so bad

trg247
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Major Depressive Disorder With Psychotic Features
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Old 10-25-2006, 01:19 AM   #3
x-Bliss-x
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Re: So confused

I've been on Celexa since March I think, either March or Feb. The upgrade has been a months course now.

Writing down triggers sound like a good idea as I have no idea what's caused the depression. I didn't have a very nice childhood (domestic violence etc) but i'm not thinking about that when i'm depressed so I can't see how it would be causing it.

Thanks,
x-Bliss-x

 
Old 10-25-2006, 06:33 AM   #4
Sannah
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Re: So confused

Bliss, sorry that you are not feeling well. You don't have to be thinking about your history of domestic violence at the time for it to be causing your moods. Having a history of this has affected who you are and how you behave and think about yourself. I personally think that most people who have a history of DV grew up in homes that set them up for this. All of this definetely contributes to your depression. When a person is mistreated by others she begins to think that she is worthless because it is natural to think that only worthless people would be treated so poorly (of course this isn't true!). This is only one way a person is affected by abuse. There are many others!

Last edited by Sannah; 10-25-2006 at 06:33 AM.

 
Old 10-25-2006, 12:31 PM   #5
x-Bliss-x
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Re: So confused

Well i'm still not sure about the past being a trigger but I had a really rough morning today and couldn't go into work. I phoned the doctor to see if I could get an appointment and they had one for this morning. I tried to talk to them in as much detail as possible and also took the mood chart with me to help me remember individual days.

I'm going to the hospital for some blood tests to rule out anything physical tomorrow, particularly the thyroid hormones and I've also been offered a pdoc if everything comes back negative, as he mentioned Bipolar being a possibility. I don't really know much about it, but it's sound like a scary label to have and I'm worried that I'll loose my job if diagnosed.

Anyway, dreading tomorrow as I'm terrified of needles, but if it has to be done, then it has to be done.

Thanks for your support!
x-Bliss-x

 
Old 10-26-2006, 02:56 PM   #6
x-Bliss-x
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Re: So confused

Just to let anyone know who is bothered that I had the blood tests done today (horrible experience) and now awaiting the results. I imagine it'll be a couple of weeks so now i'm playing the waiting game.

Thanks for peoples support
x-Bliss-x

 
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