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Is it depression??????

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Old 12-03-2006, 04:27 PM   #1
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chestersmom HB User
Talking Is it depression??????

I wish I had found this board several years ago. I'm ok now but for 4 or 5 years I had a rough time and to this day don't really know what was wrong. I so have wanted to find someone else that has had these experiences. I was experiencing spells of extreme fatigue sometimes to the point that all I did all day was sit in the lounge chair. It was an ordeal just to have to get up to go to the bathroom. Then the fatigue would lift and I would be my old (67 yr. old) self again. Very active, working in yard, always busy. Some times I would go for days doing ok then it would hit me. Sometimes last for several hours, some times all day--never any set pattern. I kept a calender or how I felt based on a score of l - 10 trying to get a handle on what might be going on or causing this. My dr. was at a total loss too after checking the usual things and nothing being wrong. She finally asked if I had reason to be depressed which I had in the past (was flooded and lost home twice) husband had had prostate cancer (but recovered) however, I would have thought I would not be having a problem with something that happened several years ago. Anyway, she put me on a low dose of Zoloft and I seemed to do better, episodes not as often and not as severe but still happening. Then about 2 yrs. ago I started getting better and as of this day am back to normal. I might mention that I lost my husband of 47 yrs. and that while he was sick was when I started getting better. Weird huh. I would have thought if it was depression I would really have hit bottom. Anyway, I am still on the Zoloft. Scared to get off. I sure would like to know of someone who has had this experience so I would know I wasn't a nut case. It seems that everyone I have ever heard of did not have these ups and downs that are so physiscal in nature. Glad to be back to normal but forever puzzled.

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Old 12-03-2006, 09:11 PM   #2
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Re: Is it depression??????

I am not a doctor but it looks like it is something other than depression, mind you a lot of symptoms sound like depression. Did the doctor check everything? Blood tests? For some reason it just does not sound like depression mind you I have been wrong before

Major Depressive Disorder With Psychotic Features
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Borderline Personality Disorder
Generalized Anxiety Disorder

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Old 12-05-2006, 02:22 PM   #3
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chestersmom HB User
Re: Is it depression??????

Thanks for response. I too have a problem believing this is depression. The only thing that leads me to think it could be is the fact that every time I've tried to get off Zoloft (several times) I've bottomed out and could barely go and went back on the Zoloft. It may just be in my mind, but I don't think so. My doctor checked everything that she thought might be a problem, blood suger, thyroid, etc. and she was just at a lost. I had been to her several times with this problem and she was very concerned as she knows me well enough to know this dragging, joyless person just wasn't me. She finally suggested the Zoloft and at that point I was willing to try nearly anything. Now every time I have a feel bad day I'm scared to death "the problem" is coming back and due to the fact that I am now alone and keep everything going including taking care of 5 acres of property, I don't know how I'd manage.

Old 12-06-2006, 01:04 AM   #4
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Re: Is it depression??????

I am sorry to read that you lost your husband. Maybe you got better because you knew you had to for him (if it was not sudden) or for yourself to take care of you business or both!

Manic depressive maybe? I don't know but my father-in-law has chronic fatigue syndrome, and he sometimes mopes about and then the next second is wired for sound.

Don't be scared, just from reading your post I get the feeling you have many friends who will help you out in a pinch, though you do not want to burden them. Just make sure you don't put it off too long if it recurs as the longer you are in it, the harder it is to get out.

As far as physical symptoms caused by the mind, my depression does and I feel strongly about it and have some very good examples. It most certainly directly contributed to 2 back surgeries, the latest only 3 weeks ago. I also this year in June, after I left work with an inability to cope at my managerial position I held, had a saliva gland of all things get badly infected to the point it was surgically removed. You have 3, so you can get by with two. I also had a narrowing of the esophagus and a hiatal hernia that were repaired while depressed, but still working at my job.

None of my dr's connnect the dots, but I feel when your mind is weakened, so is your immune system and other PHYSICAL attributes are susceptible to impairment moreso than when your mind is totally well. Am I a Dr? No, but I play one on a message board . I do know my body fairly well and have self-diagnosed, with a great deal of accuracy, most of the issues I have faced, nearly 10 major surgeries over the past 20 years of my 38 year life. I even knew it was my saliva gland that was the problem, despite improper initial diagnosis of a lymph gland. The ER Dr. was kind of PO'd as he said something to the contrary before and I told him no a couple times, it is the saliva gland. He had the, "I am the one that went to school for 15 years, I think I know better."

So my lengthy soliloquy basically says I do not know what you have, but your mind can control/lose control over physical things, allowing if not causing true illnesses. I'd argue that with anyone as I am a very good example.

I too wish I had found this site sooner. I really needed it, though, before Al Gore invented the Internet.

Old 12-06-2006, 05:47 PM   #5
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Re: Is it depression??????

Hi Mongomad, Sounds like you have really had a lot of problems in your relatively short life. You know, it's ridiculous when these doctors think they're God and act like you have mush for brains. Did your doctor apologize when you were right about your problem (I'm sure not). You know, my dr. once hinted at manic depressive but the feeling I had was not manic, just my old self that is usually pretty energetic. I started feeling better in Aug. before my husband was diagnosed with cancer at the end of Sept. of 04 so I don't think that really had anything to do with my condition. I was just so glad I was doing well and was able to be there for him during that time. Also now that I have to be alone. He used to tease me and say he was my "problem" and I guess if he could see me now, he'd say Yep, I knew it was me. Of course it definitely wasn't. I had a good husband.

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