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  • 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

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    Old 05-05-2009, 12:01 PM   #1
    dandemom
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    44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    I have these days where I just wish I didn't have to keep living. I've been on Prozac for perimenopausal mood swings for about a year and it helped ALOT! But lately I've been having these thoughts again. I am dealing with a lot of emotional issues, parent with Alzhemiers, grown children with problems, a period that lasted over a month. I guess I just get overwhelmed. I have a good support system but think I'm crazy for feeling this way? I'd never want to hurt the people I love but I sometimes want to stop doing life! I think about dying at least 3 or 4 times a week!

     
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    Old 05-05-2009, 12:40 PM   #2
    TEdds83
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    Man you should just like me! I am 44 and right now I am sitting here in my chair bawling my eyes out. I am seriously having a perimenopausal breakdown or something. I don't know where to turn, who to have help me, I am completely lost.

    I am having a BAD period!! I have had cramps for several days. Something is wrong in my mind. I feel doomed. I am always worried and afraid that I am DYING!! all the time! I can barely hold a job down. I was going to take summer classes at the community college but I am going to fore go that right now. I am just a basket case.

    I just had my hormones tested. I barely have any progesterone or testosterone. The pharmacist made me a bioidentical cream and I tried it one day before my period and I blamed the cramps and nausea from the cream. I am waiting to try it again after my period.

    Periods are worse now....heavy on the first day, then only last like 3 days. But they could change at any moment. I feel like hell. I got diarrhea with this one and my acid reflux is acting up. I have barely slept. This makes it all worse. Basically since age 40 my body is breaking down. I became hypothyroid then too. So I don't know if my thyroid is acting up. I keep getting that checked and it's been normal on my meds. I feel like a nuisance to my doctor.

    My stressors are my house is in Foreclosure. My daughters are now 20 and 22and have moved out in the last year or two, I feel like I am a no body with my life, I am angry with an aunt of mine who has hurt our family and I just plain feel crapped on. There are many other things but I won't mention them all.

    So do I try the creams and hope they straighten out my hormones?? Then see if I need depression meds?? Or should I get depression meds right away? I have only been on Celexa 9 years ago. That was for about 6 months. It did work for me after being on it for 30 days. But those 30 days were horrible. So many side effects. I don't know if I can go through that again to get to a good place. I tried Lexapro for one day. haha! I had an outer body experience with that. Then I threw them out. So what am I gonna do?

    I just don't know how I am gonna get through these years of perimenopause. I really don't. And with the stress of the economy and I have lost alot of my home business I am depressed. I know I sound like a freak right now. I just really need a friend. I have no one, absolutely no one in person to talk to about perimenopause and depression around here. Any girlfriends want to change the subject or actually say to me that they have no symptoms at all. I just cringe like...you have got to be kidding??!! Why do I have all of them??

    Thank God for the boards here. It is the only place I have someone to talk to.
    Thanks! Always here to talk. I hope you feel better. I am sorry about your parent with Alzheimers and kids issues and please don't let anything bad happen. Life is worth living! It just has to get better for us ok?!

    HUGS!

    Last edited by TEdds83; 05-05-2009 at 12:43 PM.

     
    Old 05-06-2009, 04:29 PM   #3
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    First you are not crazy to be feeling overwhelmed or any other feeling you described. You appear to have a lot on your plate.

    Please do this "develop any serious problems, such as suicidal thoughts or behavior, hallucinations, or panic attacks, notify your healthcare provider immediately."

    If I was in your shoes taking Prozac, I would ask to be moved to another med.

    Prozac does not have a good history.

     
    Old 05-06-2009, 04:36 PM   #4
    TEdds83
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    Yes, that is really true about the Prozac. My sister took it briefly a few years back and saw things, like 3 trojen horses running towards her. Apparently she was hallucenating. Sounds horrific to me. I prefer Celexa because it targets anxiety. I did well on that. Hang in there!

     
    Old 05-06-2009, 05:38 PM   #5
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    Thanks Tedds83! We do need a support system and I'm here for you! I don't know what I'd do without being able to vent.. We are not alone. It is a long complicated road. I have more good days than really bad ones, today being good. But when I have a bad one it's bad. Not long ago I ate three chocolate muffins and slept all day after bawling my eyes out and sending texts to my grown kids and husband that I just wanted to die. How stupid! I scared them all and maybe wanted the attention but I honestly felt that way. I wouldn't do anything, but I did give my meds to my husband cause I scare myself sometimes. I do think it is time to ask my gyno about a new med. I didn't have a gyno til recently and a family physician was treating me. Maybe the gyno can give me something that works more consistantly than Prozac.
    I hope things start looking up for you too soon. Grown children are selfish for awhile but I'm hoping they come around! A lot of people are stressed economically. It is hard to see an end sometimes to all the problems. But from past experience with divorce and terminal illlness in my family I know that all things do get better. There is good in life...
    I am having endometrial ablasion to stop my periods. I hope it works but it wont stop the hormonal issues. I haven't dealt with those, no artificial hormones. What about Birth control pills? I've read that may help???
    Be sure and vent anytime to me and I'll try to be here for you. Thanks for your support and sharing your commonality. Take care!

    Last edited by dandemom; 05-07-2009 at 09:07 AM. Reason: change in personal info

     
    Old 05-07-2009, 03:20 PM   #6
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    Hi Lojreading! and all! I have had another bad, low day today. Man this is weird. Yesterday I as almost ok again and then today I was low as can be. I have had a headache, allergy trouble, SO TIRED...and made a big mistake having McDonolds. I feel SICK! I swear I need to quit eating food there. I have been nauseated and it made me have IBS...constantly running to the bathroom. I think Coke and drinks with caffeine are just a bad idea for me. My system is all messed up with perimenopause that my tolerance for things I used to be able to eat and drink has all changed.

    Am I crazy or what? Am I dying and don't know it? Or do I have depression?? Peri?? IBS?? Major anxiety? Or ALL of this?!

    I just want to lay down and sleep. If I am off balance and need antideprs. maybe the depression is causing the body symptoms. I just want ONE doctor to put the whole puzzle together. I am just running to all different doctors for each different symptom. Grrrrh!

    Do any of you ever feel like this??

    Thanks for being here for me, I am here for you too!

    Last edited by TEdds83; 05-07-2009 at 03:21 PM.

     
    Old 05-09-2009, 12:52 PM   #7
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    I changed my username to dandemom. I am feeling rather irritable today. My mood that is. I haven't had the IBS thing, thank goodness. I don't know if that could be related to perimenapause? Have you had an ultra sound to see if everything is okay with your uterus and ovaries? I did and a thickening of the lining of the uterus was causing my period problems. The endometrial ablasion should help with that and I've heard good things about it. If I don't have a period anymore maybe I'll feel better??? Caffeine messes with me, makes me anxious and my heart sometimes races...don't think it's too good for us moody women I do think it is best to see one doctor about all things if possible. Otherwise there is too many conflicting opinions.
    I do understand where you are coming from. I feel like a hypochondriac!
    I think I did read something that might encourage us all... ""But suppose I live each day thankful that Jesus Christ loves me? That He died to redeem me? That His love never ends, that His mercies are new every morning? Then my bank account does not have me at it's mercy, nor does my happiness depend on a doctor's prognosis. If I lose it all, I can still give thanks to God."- Laughing Matters by Phil Callaway

     
    Old 05-20-2009, 03:01 AM   #8
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by dandemom View Post
    I changed my username to dandemom. I am feeling rather irritable today. My mood that is. I haven't had the IBS thing, thank goodness. I don't know if that could be related to perimenapause? Have you had an ultra sound to see if everything is okay with your uterus and ovaries? I did and a thickening of the lining of the uterus was causing my period problems. The endometrial ablasion should help with that and I've heard good things about it. If I don't have a period anymore maybe I'll feel better??? Caffeine messes with me, makes me anxious and my heart sometimes races...don't think it's too good for us moody women I do think it is best to see one doctor about all things if possible. Otherwise there is too many conflicting opinions.
    I do understand where you are coming from. I feel like a hypochondriac!
    I think I did read something that might encourage us all... ""But suppose I live each day thankful that Jesus Christ loves me? That He died to redeem me? That His love never ends, that His mercies are new every morning? Then my bank account does not have me at it's mercy, nor does my happiness depend on a doctor's prognosis. If I lose it all, I can still give thanks to God."- Laughing Matters by Phil Callaway

     
    Old 05-20-2009, 03:18 AM   #9
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    hi after many years of searching i have found something that can help and may totaly get rid of perimenapause symptoms in time, MACA i found this after many hours of searching i started taking it three weeks ago. Already there are signs of my sanity returning. After many years of looking round at people in the street and supermarket thinking why do they look so normal. Why cant i get a grip on life.The sleepless nights bitchy cranky angry unable to concentrate to the point i couldnt hold a conversation,ibs kronic fatigue pressure in my head so many symptoms i felt like a nutter . Now three weeks in i have slowly built up to eight capsules a day and i am feeling so much better.Sleeping so much better lost a few pound even read a book something i couldnt do before. Even got my labido back hey life can be good.It is still early days but do a bit of research on MACA and see what you think.Kick them hormones back into rhythm

     
    Old 05-21-2009, 09:17 AM   #10
    Matt321
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    Re: 44 year old mom who sometime doesn't feel like doing another day!

    i feel like not doing another day periodically throughout the day
    but i have to

    medicines can stop working and have to be checked throughout using them by your psych. he could probably fix this

     
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