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My partner doesnt understand

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Old 10-16-2012, 04:48 AM   #1
Join Date: Oct 2012
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Jaymee18 HB User
My partner doesnt understand

I am only 20years old and had a beautiful daughter 12month ago, after a couple of months i knew something wasnt right, i couldnt get out of bed in the mornin(literally) which wasnt like me before. I always felt miserable and many other symptoms of depression, it was only a couple of months ago i was actually diagnosed with postnatal depression, my partner doesnt understand that its an illness, he thinks you can get better over night, the fact he doesnt understand makes this illness alot harder to deal with as i dont have his support. He thinks im lazy and just shrug all responsibilty off to him, I often ask him if this is what he thinks i wanted. I hardly ever eat and sleep way too much, and im frightened of being left alone with my daughter incase she gets hurt. How do i get him to understand how hard this is for me to deal with? i havent got the bond with my baby that he has due to my depression which he also just doesnt understand.

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Old 10-16-2012, 08:08 AM   #2
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Re: My partner doesnt understand

Hello Jaymee18.

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with depression and your partner is unsupportive.

Are you currently seeing a doctor and/or therapist for your depression? If so, I think it may help if your doctor or whoever talks with your partner about what you're going through and that depression is a real illness and not something you're making up to avoid any responsibilities.

Old 10-16-2012, 10:26 AM   #3
Join Date: Oct 2012
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klq HB User
Re: My partner doesnt understand

as a spouse of someone who is depressed-it is hard to deal with seeing someone you love crumbling and remember he isnt a professional so he cant help you but he also doesnt have the capacity to understand that how hes reacting to you makes it worse for you. he is resentful hurt and angry and he isnt to blame and neither are you-you have a condition an illness and he isnt equipped to deal with it. he doesnt know how.
are you currently seeking treatment? are you trying to get help? if not that can be anissue to. my husband is like you and doesnt want to get outta bed or do anything and its easier to help someone who is showing an initiative to get help. i hope your situation gets better, it will only get worse if you dont do something soon trust me i know.

Old 10-25-2012, 04:19 PM   #4
Join Date: May 2011
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Belly864 HB User
Re: My partner doesnt understand

Hi Jaymee:

I hear you, and it's not unusual for others to not understand. Get some help from a doctor. Sometimes it takes an actual medical professional to help get the point across that your mental health is serious business. Since you have a child, it is even more important for you to be the best you possible to take care of them. You deserve to feel good and have a happy life, and your child deserves a happy parent. Good luck!

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